- Username
- debmarstay
- Date posted
- 3y ago
You are right. If he's not ready to start treatment. I am not a therapist just someone who struggles with OCD. Here are some tips. 1. Educate yourself about OCD. If you don't have it yourself, it can be hard to understand why people with OCD think and act the way they do. A good book is OCD Travel Guide by Michael Parker. He does a good job explaining obsessions and compulsions. It is common for people with OCD to rope others into doing compulsions with them. Especially if they are dealing with contamination OCD. Don't let him do that. It is also common for people with OCD to seek reassurance. Do NOT give reassurance. It will relieve his anxiety for a short time, but ultimately, it will only make his OCD worse. Treatment for OCD is not fun or easy. There is no quick fix. Recovery is possible, but it takes time and hard work. Seeking treatment is scary. But you can't just wish OCD away. The longer it goes untreated, the worse it will get. I would ask your son if he wants to spend the rest of his life feeling and living the way he is right now? Unfortunately, some people have to hit rock bottom before they are willing to change. Hope this helps.
Hey I made long reply but it got deleted so just ask me any question and I will answer.
I agree with most of what Lms526 said, but I differ in opinion when it comes to prompting someone to imagine a lifetime of despair in the hopes that they'll see a therapist. I can see how that might be a useful exercise for certain individuals, but it might be unhelpful for others. Speaking from personal experience, it's not uncommon for some of us with ocd, myself included, to regard themselves through a perfectionistic lens. My tolerance for personal inconsistency used to be a lot lower, and I'd beat myself up any time I failed in the smallest way. I was also deathly afraid that I'd never really get better, because how could I when I was still able to fail so easily? Accepting my flaws and the possibility of failure was incredibly liberating because it gave me the freedom to work toward a better life without feeling as afraid of setbacks or as devastated at minor mistakes. For the first time, I was motivated by a desire for a better life rather than my fears of a terrifying one. So I think it can be helpful advice, but part of that depends on the person it is being given to, what motivates them best, and where they're at in life.
That is a very good point. 100% agree
I’m new here and need help, not as someone who suffers from OCD, but as a mother who’s child (I believe) suffers from OCD. We have not had an official diagnosis yet as I am searching for a physician at this time. She has all of the aspects on the subject specifically, so I really wouldn’t be surprised by an OCD diagnosis at all. My question is, do any of you remember a time when the OCD became a problem for you? I meant, did something happen to trigger it or make it much worse or more evident? I’ve always known she was a “perfectionist” and very intellectually minded, so to speak, but several incidents happened last year (she’s almost 14) with some friends that didn’t end well. Since then, it’s as if she can’t focus at all and gets very obsessed by things. Almost like the incidents last year exacerbated the underlying problem. I want to help her however I can until we can get into a Dr, I just don’t know how and it seems she gets mad and irritated with me when I try, which is hurting this Moms heart. Can any of you suggest what I should or shouldn’t do at this point? She literally becomes frozen with certain fears, like being stung by a bee (never been stung before). Honestly, she’s had a fear of going to the bathroom forever (10 years), but medical Drs have never been able to help and now I know why. So, all to say, I’m not in denial but just want to help her. Thanks for any input you can give.
I’m new here. My son who is 10 is developing OCD rapidly, I feel like it’s getting worse. I don’t know how to help him. He keeps washing his hands . He is afraid of touching everything. His hands gets irritated and starts to develop rash but he never stops. When I encounter him he gets rigid or starts to cry . He makes his brother clean himself or his hands again n again too which annoys and frustrates him which eventually cause them into serious fight. He is developing other miss behavior too. How to start with this thing ? I’m afraid if he doesn’t get help , it will get worse with age .
Hello everyone! I am not the one having OCD, but my boyfriend does, and it is combined with depression. He hides it pretty well (he doesn't want to make me or any other person sad) and acts like everything is normal most of the time (makes everyone laugh etc. - like many other depressed people) even though I know he suffers a lot. We know each other on a very deep level and I am the only person who he has told about having OCD and depression, and I just want to help him as much as I can. The thing is that he has a lot of negative thoughts most of the time and if he doesn't do something, for example, claps his hands 8 times, he believes 100% something bad is going to happen to me, like I'm gonna get hurt or something. At the moment it is not possible for him to talk to specialized OCD therapist as there is not one in the area where we live in, but I am confident that I can help him or, even better, guide him, so he helps himself, so that he, at least, suffers less from this. What advice would you give me? I know that I shouldn't be too pushy or telling him what I think he should do. I just want him to know that I'm there for him and that, even though I cannot understand what he's going through, I can at least educate myself about OCD (I've seen some self-help books you posted here) and talk to him about what I've read, because I think it is better to talk about it rather than him hiding it and suffering in silence.. This is how I thought I could help him: When I see or when he tells me that compulsions are happening or going to happen, I'm gonna let him know that he is not going through this alone and that he can trust me. Then I will ask him to tell me what kind of thoughts are going through his mind at the moment, and if he, for example, tells me that he thinks something bad is gonna happen to me I'm gonna tell him to try not to do any compulsive behaviour and try to, no matter how hard it is at the moment, accept that thought and repeat after me: You are safe. I am safe. We are always going to be safe. Only good things happen to us and always will. I believe that if this is done constantly that it will make his OCD more managenable (and depression as well). I would really appreciate any comment, expert or from a person having a similar experience that my boyfriend has. I really want to help him. Thank you! ❤
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