- Date posted
- 18w
I am the mother of an adult child with ocd.
Overwhelmed
Overwhelmed
It can be overwhelming to see your child struggle with this or any condition. Just try and be there for them if they need someone to listen and whatever they tell you doesn't define them, it proves they're strong enough to face the struggles and done the hardest part, telling their closest people what's happening
I sort of understand I have a child who's schizophrenic and I try so hard to help her and understand I don't think anyone can understand what they are going through as a parent ww want to be there for them. It has made my OCD way worse when she was diagnosed her grandmother on her dad's side of the family was also schizophrenic. I do think that something traumatic can make OCD worse it is difficult but as a parent ww have to be positive and be there for them and try to understand
@Carebear3271 Thank you.
Hi, thank you for the vulnerability here. You are not alone in feeling overwhelmed with supporting loved ones with OCD. Often how we want to support them does not actually support the person, it ends up fueling OCD and keeping our loved one from recovering. I hope that your loved one is in good care with an ERP specialist. We have a few resources you may be interested in; I've attached them below. Supporting someone with OCD: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZVIeBV9M-c Reassurance and OCD: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jzHHjSI4Ek
Big hug to you. I can't imagine what that's like. Here is an article that may be helpful to you in your situation: https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/how-to-lovingly-detach-from-our-childs-ocd-and-anxiety
So am I! Yikes, what a challenge! As parents, we think can do the same for any of kids whether they have OCD or not. But people with OCD do not benefit from reassurance (such as 'don't worry, you won't get sick, etc.) In fact, reassurance makes OCD worse! So does doing as the adult child asks in order to alleviate their stress (for example washing your hands or doing something a specific way to calm them down.) The best we can do as parents is to instill confidence (you've got this!) and assert yourself as unwilling to give in to their OCD's demands. There is much more to this! Here is an article that may be helpful. https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/reassurance-is-actually-making-you-less-assured
It's so hard to love an adult child who suffers but will not seek help. So much time wasted and lost when they should be building a life for themselves they love. Breaks my heart every day. My son can not keep a job due to ocd and it's really ripped his self esteem to pieces. He now obsesses over politics on tv to the point he is angry with everyone around them for not being ampted up as much as he is and it's ruining his relationships. It's heartbreaking.
Please read this. I’ve had ocd pretty much a lot of my life but never knew what it was until my senior year of highschool. I’m 21 with 2 kids and i believe i’ve had pocd a little bit before my daughter was born (which was 8 months ago). It made me start looking at all kids differently and i hate it. But it really started triggering me about 3 months ago. I’ve been thinking if i’d intentionally touched or harmed my kids the wrong way, or any kids for that matter. This started giving me false memories (or at least hope they are). I’ve been having panic attacks, yelling at myself, punching walls, praying, and even thoughts of ending my own life. I grew up in a severe toxic household throughout my childhood and teenage life. I’ve never wished that on my kids since i became a dad. I wanna give them the life i never got. I look back my photos of my children and i feel like i’m a complete fraud of a dad. I cannot look at my kids or be around them a lot of times. I can’t hold my daughter right. I can’t change their diaper when they need it. Even my son came and was hugging on me the other night while i was watching tv and i acted like a stranger to him. I can very little do this stuff sometimes because it’s either i get relief or i push my thoughts as far back as i can. I get scared if i did something to not just my kids, but any other kids in the past. I have such a a great life and such a beautiful family. It was hard and stressful at first being young with a family but i couldn’t be more thankful at all for them. I’m just so lost and stressed right now that i just don’t know what to do anymore
Hi everyone, I’m Cayla. I’m a mom that’s lived with OCD since childhood, but my breaking point came more recently after having my son. I was consumed by terrifying thoughts—What if I hurt him? What if I did something awful without realizing it? I was so afraid of my own mind that I couldn’t be alone with him. The shame and exhaustion were unbearable, and I convinced myself I was broken. In 2024, I finally sought help. ERP therapy at NOCD was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but it saved my life. Even now, I have tough days, but I know I don’t have to be ruled by OCD. When my 12 year old daughter began showing signs of OCD, I felt overwhelmed with guilt. I never wanted her to go through what I had, but I knew what to do. I told her that I have OCD too and made sure she knew it wasn’t her fault—and that she wasn’t alone. One of the hardest parts of this journey was trusting someone else with my daughter’s OCD. I knew how vulnerable it feels to share intrusive thoughts, and I wanted her to feel safe. Her NOCD therapist was able to establish trust and genuine empathy from the start, and that relationship gave her the confidence to face ERP head-on. Seeing her build that trust made me certain she was in the right hands. ERP has helped both of us reclaim our lives, and it is beautiful to see my daughter managing her condition and making visible progress. Parenting with OCD while raising a child with OCD isn’t talked about enough, but I know so many parents are struggling with these same challenges. If you have questions about managing OCD while parenting, helping your child through ERP, or breaking cycles of guilt, drop them below—I’d love to share what I’ve learned. I’ll be answering all of the questions I receive in real-time today 4-5pm ET.
Please comment. Just say if follows along the OCD pattern or not. I don't need reassurance per se! My daughter was laying across me and every time I breathed a certain way I was getting a groinal sensation. I kept breathing like that anyways (ugh idk why), and then my mind told me I had hurt/a**aulted her that I might as well do something else to hurt because what's more. So idk why or what overcame me other than the thought of doing it because my mind told me I had hurt her already ("my mind literally made me question what to do and I guess the only thing I could come up with was using my elbow) and causing another feeling but it came across my mind to elbow her, and I elbowed her crotch or side/thigh area. Which caused another very unwanted groinal sensation. Then I began FREAKING smooth out. And I've been stressing since. I feel like as a mom I don't deserve to be hers anymore. Idk what overcame me but my therapist says it's all OCD. I was doing SO well! Is this really OCD? This has all caused me a great amount of anxiety. I feel like a terrible person and mom. I just need help knowing if this is OCD. Not wanting reassurance. Just wanting to know if this lines up with the POCD I've been diagnosed with by my current therapist.
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