I had a good time tonight as I celebrated one of my friends' birthday -- and OCD has been quite manageable for a few days. But for no reason, while waiting at the crossing on our way back home I suddenly had this image of me pushing another friend of mine (who was here) in front of a bus. It felt so real for a couple of minutes, I thought I actually did it. This is so disturbing, I can't stop thinking that I might be capable of hurting people and I really should avoid them for their own safety. I've always had low self-esteem but it feels even worse at the moment.

itsmatilda

206d ago

Now I feel like I don't deserve (and also won't be able) to sleep well tonight 🥲

hello123_

206d ago

You aren’t your thoughts!

Anonymous

206d ago

i had this exact thought a thought that i was going to push my bff into the water and i backed up and starting bawling you are not alone

PolarisJoy

206d ago

I've been living with the uncertainty that I might hurt my friends and family. You are not alone. Please don't avoid people, that's a compulsion and it prevents you from getting better. Lean in to your fears and even confront them. You'll soon realise that it's no big deal.