- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I deal with rocd but not with these exact thoughts. However, I went to one of the ROCD group sessions and there were a lot of people going through the same thing. You should think about attending one
- Date posted
- 3y
Are they free? Where do I attend them? I am new to this app
- Date posted
- 3y
yes! in my first relationship and my current relationship (2nd) i experience obsessing about my partner cheating on me. and everything at first, especially in the beginning of my current relationship, triggered the shit out of me. eventually i was able to just give into the idea that im not gonna no for sure, so i might as well continue giving my all in the relationship. to which my rocd is triggered and has me questioning if he’s even worth it in the first place lol. its been a huge battle but i can definitely say continuing with mindfulness and erp and most importantly, self-compassion, has greatly improved my situation to be manageable. ngl i dont expect this sort of thing (ocd) to just go away, but im learning how to live a good life and make friends with fear and uncertainty. i totally feel you though, its exhausting and even heart breaking that you can’t fully enjoy time spent with your partner because of your doubt. no matter what be kind to yourself
- Date posted
- 3y
Yess! I feel like I can’t even enjoy it, in a way, it’s as though i’ve always got my guard up thinking that he’s cheating so that I don’t even have to be vulnerable with him. If I constantly believe he’s cheating, it means I don’t have to put myself at risk of getting hurt if you get me? It is completely exhausting and occasionally I will have moments where the doubt disappears and I finally enjoy it and it feels amazing to just not care but it always comes back after being triggered. I’ve found that paradoxically, one of my triggers is when he’s super loving and affectionate :( seems to be like I self sabotage our relationship when it’s going well
- Date posted
- 3y
im going through the same thing right now!!! i had an episode a couple days ago after like a good two weeks of just being happy. my therapist says it could also be linked to my anxious attachment style as well, and looking into that has helped me gain some more compassion and understanding for myself. she also says that keeping your guard up doesnt make it any less painful, kinda like when you’re getting a shot and you tense up and it kinda just makes it hurt more. like yeah maybe you wont be caught with your pants down but you miss out on being in the moment, and thats what matters most i think. of course its easier said than done, and theres moments where it’s hard to believe in any of this (probably always gonna be) but i think we owe it to ourselves to make connections that help us and the other person grow. going through this is really difficult, but knowing we’re not alone in this helps :)
- Date posted
- 3y
I have this too you’re not alone
- Date posted
- 3y
I feel like there’s not a lot of info out there and I feel crazy with the thoughts. I thought it was ROCD but ROCD seems to be more concerned with other aspects
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m wondering if there is a way we can keep in contact so we can help each other when we become triggered
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
For about a month now I’ve been really obsessed with the idea that my girlfriend has feelings for this guy we know if he has feelings for her. We’ve only known him for about a month and we’re not that close to him. The stuff that makes me worried is completely normal for friends to do or are things that aren’t real. . They respond to each other on group chats . They hangout in groups when I’m not there . She finds him funny and smiles when she’s around him . I just have a bad feeling It’s become such a thing in my mind and it’s deteriorating our relationship. Every time I see him and her talk I feel mad and sick and anxious. And now I’m starting to hate him. I feel like I’m being so unfair because she hasn’t actually done anything, and I keep accusing her and treating her like she has. She says she feels like all I see is the worst in her and like she’s a bad person. I’ve brought this up to her many times and every time she tells me she would never cheat on me and that he’s some random guy and that she doesn’t want him she wants me. I just can’t get the idea out of my head, I can’t stop unconsciously looking for signs of romantic feelings between them. I analyse her body language or how she looks at him, I check if there online at the same time to see if their texting or something. It’s really bad. It’s gotten to the point where it’s not about the idea that they have feeings anymore it’s more just I want to get the idea out my head. I want to stop seeing this. Because she would have said something by now. And I know this is coming from a place of fear and insecurity about myself and the way she feels about me, because he’s no different to any of her other friends I just chose him to be the one I worry about. I want to get past this because our relationship needs to move past this and I want to be able to enjoy the time I spend with my friends instead of relating it to this and the idea of hanging out in this group with her where he is, and if causing instant anxiety. She’s not like this, she’s a good person. It’s not necessarily the idea she’ll actually cheat it’s the idea she’ll develop feeling or he will and will make her catch feelings too. It’s all just a “bad feeling” I have and an obsession with this idea. I can’t stand to be around them in a group cuz all I can see is that “she’s in love with him” or “he would make her or does make her happier”
- Date posted
- 21w
I suffer with a constant worry of what if I’ve cheated. You name it I’ve thought I’ve done it. I’m quite flirty at nature and also insecure. Sometimes hand in hand I don’t think they balance each other out as the constant need for attention to validate myself can backfire. Although I have the best partner ever and she makes me feel nothing less than beautiful I still crave validation from others. That being said someone I used to work with left over half a year ago and when they worked at my current place of work we were very close. Text everyday, phone calls you name it. However looking back I was extra flirty as I wanted him to fancy me. I wanted the power to turn him down to make myself feel better. Awful I know. Now all I can think about is what if I’ve done something. What if I kissed him. What if I’ve slept with him etc. I’ve kept our whole conversations from the minute I got his personal number. I constantly search key words to see if my intrusive thoughts are real. I can except the uncertainty my therapist tells me about as if I have done the worst and cheated I would loose my partner and our 10 year relationship. I love her so much she is my life but I can’t stop thinking what if I’ve cheated. Does anyone else suffer with the same theme? If so how do you cope?
- Date posted
- 19w
I have this deep fear I’ll accidentally cheat on my long term partner. This fear was initially triggered a couple years ago after being at a bar with my friends where I enjoyed the attention of being flirted with by a stranger. Because of my enjoyment of receiving verbal attention, I began spiraling about what if I accidentally cheat. Since then I have made multiple confessions to my partner to seek reassurance, replayed events over and over in my head, spent hours googling/looking at reddit threads, and now I dread “bar like” situations where I know my partner won’t be around. Today I was triggered and have wasted about 4-5 hours of my day ruminating. Does anyone else with relationship ocd struggle with this fear and have any tips?
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