I hate that we have to suffer with sexual orientation OCD. Heck in the way, way past I was aroused by Lesbian porn but it never made me doubt my heterosexuality. But now with this OCD subject and the constant mental rituals ocd tells me that because of what I did in the past it means I’m a lesbian and I just haven’t realized it yet. And during ERP when the behavioral specialist tell me to imagine that the thoughts might be true (that’s what you have to do in ERP) it terrifies me and makes me so so sick. I just don’t want it to be true. I’ve always dreamed of having a husband, even now in moments like these I wish he was here to hold me now and tell me everything will be ok...

Also: STOP CHECKING. Its very hard, but you need to stop checking people for whether or not youre attracted to them or checking your reactions to porn. This is a huge compulsion and will only hurt you. Its very hard to resist but its something you have to learn to do.

There is a difference, but you are supposed to treat them the same. Labelling one as bad and one as good will only hurt you and make your ocd worse. One is a response due to the anxiety, but again, youre supposed to treat both as neutral.

I don’t know if this will help but I will share and hope it does. Try ( and I know this is hard) to say I might fall somewhere on the sexuality spectrum but it doesn’t matter because i love my current partner and I will not let a specific label dictate who I love or marry. I don’t have to identify as anything in particular to myself or anyone because I know I am happy with this Particular person whether it male or female. Basically don’t let the need for a label control your decisions. Hope that makes some sense? If it doesn’t completely disregard. Just know I’ve been there.

@gfaux im a straight guy with so ocd so i was wondering how it impacts u physically? Do you get the groinal sensations towards women?

@js94 i do, yes, but my body doesnt respond sexually to them. I.e. if i try to masturbate to the idea of a woman or her parts, i cant get erect or have any sexual progress. I do, however get groinals as theyre coupled with checking behaviours and anxiety. My symptoms however may not be synonymous with others though as everyones bodies and brains are different.

I didn't know we were supposed to treat them as the same thanks gfaux. Do u get any other physical reactions or sensations. I always get the sensation that someone is behind me doing sexual things to me

Oh i get tons. I dont even think i can list them all but i know theyre all symptoms of my oc and my anxiety

An important thing is accepting that its your ocd. When an intrusive thought comes into your mind, instead of debating it, notice that its there and let it sit there and float away on its own. The harder you fight it, the worse it will get and the more intrusive and graphic itll become. An important thing is to try and find a therapist who can lead you through ERP. ERP is exposure and response prevention, in which you are slowly exposed to what you fear and are denied doing your compulsions to make you feel better. You can look up self-help ERP, but many people find a therapist the best choice as self guided erp can sometimes be too much too soon. Its supposed to be stepped to gradually make you less afraid.

Right there with you. Im a gay guy with so-ocd. My brain is super hard on the "you just havent realized it yet. Keep trying and youll figure it out." Its horrible. Im in a relationship with the love of my life and i feel like im pissing the days away. Its terrible.

Same here.. :(

@gonzalmc no disrespect but that does not really help me. I don’t really care about or focus on labels I’m just scarred that I won’t be able to be with the sex/gender I prefer witch is with men. And I scares me thinking I would have to be with a women

Finally someone can tell me what is groinal responses??? I know what it is!!! but what is the difference from arouse , how are you sure what is happen?

Yeah it sucks. Any advice for me ? Seems like you have a good idea about dealing with obsessions and compulsions