- Username
- Tolly537
- Date posted
- 5y ago
- Username
- GfauxGfaux
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Also: STOP CHECKING. Its very hard, but you need to stop checking people for whether or not youre attracted to them or checking your reactions to porn. This is a huge compulsion and will only hurt you. Its very hard to resist but its something you have to learn to do.
- Username
- GfauxGfaux
- Date posted
- 5y ago
There is a difference, but you are supposed to treat them the same. Labelling one as bad and one as good will only hurt you and make your ocd worse. One is a response due to the anxiety, but again, youre supposed to treat both as neutral.
- Username
- gonzalmcgonzalmc
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I don’t know if this will help but I will share and hope it does. Try ( and I know this is hard) to say I might fall somewhere on the sexuality spectrum but it doesn’t matter because i love my current partner and I will not let a specific label dictate who I love or marry. I don’t have to identify as anything in particular to myself or anyone because I know I am happy with this Particular person whether it male or female. Basically don’t let the need for a label control your decisions. Hope that makes some sense? If it doesn’t completely disregard. Just know I’ve been there.
- Username
- js94js94
- Date posted
- 5y ago
@gfaux im a straight guy with so ocd so i was wondering how it impacts u physically? Do you get the groinal sensations towards women?
- Username
- GfauxGfaux
- Date posted
- 5y ago
@js94 i do, yes, but my body doesnt respond sexually to them. I.e. if i try to masturbate to the idea of a woman or her parts, i cant get erect or have any sexual progress. I do, however get groinals as theyre coupled with checking behaviours and anxiety. My symptoms however may not be synonymous with others though as everyones bodies and brains are different.
- Username
- js94js94
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I didn't know we were supposed to treat them as the same thanks gfaux. Do u get any other physical reactions or sensations. I always get the sensation that someone is behind me doing sexual things to me
- Username
- GfauxGfaux
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Oh i get tons. I dont even think i can list them all but i know theyre all symptoms of my oc and my anxiety
- Username
- GfauxGfaux
- Date posted
- 5y ago
An important thing is accepting that its your ocd. When an intrusive thought comes into your mind, instead of debating it, notice that its there and let it sit there and float away on its own. The harder you fight it, the worse it will get and the more intrusive and graphic itll become. An important thing is to try and find a therapist who can lead you through ERP. ERP is exposure and response prevention, in which you are slowly exposed to what you fear and are denied doing your compulsions to make you feel better. You can look up self-help ERP, but many people find a therapist the best choice as self guided erp can sometimes be too much too soon. Its supposed to be stepped to gradually make you less afraid.
- Username
- GfauxGfaux
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Right there with you. Im a gay guy with so-ocd. My brain is super hard on the "you just havent realized it yet. Keep trying and youll figure it out." Its horrible. Im in a relationship with the love of my life and i feel like im pissing the days away. Its terrible.
- Username
- zilenzilen
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Same here.. :(
- Username
- Tolly537Tolly537
- Date posted
- 5y ago
@gonzalmc no disrespect but that does not really help me. I don’t really care about or focus on labels I’m just scarred that I won’t be able to be with the sex/gender I prefer witch is with men. And I scares me thinking I would have to be with a women
- Username
- zilenzilen
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Finally someone can tell me what is groinal responses??? I know what it is!!! but what is the difference from arouse , how are you sure what is happen?
- Username
- js94js94
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yeah it sucks. Any advice for me ? Seems like you have a good idea about dealing with obsessions and compulsions
Related posts
- Username
- Idk
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I seriously have never thought about girls until now. It just never crossed my mind. I never liked or had feelings for a girl. And now that I’m constantly questioning everything and picturing everything. It just feels like I like it. It scares me, would I be happy with a girl ?? I don’t want to be with a girl but I feels like I do want this. It’s so confusing. I can’t tell whether this is actually ocd or I’m genuinely attracted to the same sex. I hate this so much !!! It’s like I just completely lost myself and questioned it so much I’ve just become lesbian but some things just don’t make sense. Why would I catch feelings for other boys? Never girls. I don’t know anymore. I’m happy with my boyfriend. Without these thoughts I’d be so good and so much more happy. Now I just don’t fucking know and this hurts so damn bad that I can’t just rest not one day. This is so damn stressful and hurtful to question your identity every single day. Sometimes I seriously just feel like I’m lesbian but I can’t seem to settle on that because I just can’t be. I want to just die. I hate what my mind is doing to me. I hate I have to go through these thoughts alone. I hate everything. I just want to crawl in a hole and never see anyone. I just want to hug my boyfriend and have my thoughts erased. I’ve thought too much and too deep I can’t stop. I’m crying from sadness because I don’t know what’s real anymore and I never in a million years thought this is something I’d have to deal with.
- Username
- Lavander
- Date posted
- 1y ago
so-ocd
New thought just creeped in: as I used to watch same sex porn, am I afraid of what this means (being gay) or am I just denying that I liked it? It seems like it's the same thing, but what if I, deep down, know I like it and am just denying it? Maybe this isnt even OCD. And my so-ocd latches on to this, to sexual attraction so much, bc it's not something we choose. But I want to be attracted to men. I've always liked men. I don't want to be with a woman. I'm so done with this, it brings me so much suffering. Please be mindful if you respond to this. I'm already feeling so bad..
- Username
- yessyess
- Date posted
- 1y ago
Starting ERP with NOCD today
I was able to sleep better but being calm takes me down to a spiral. I’m scared, what if I’m bisexual or a lesbian and I’m just lying to myself? What if I like the exposures, what if the exposures become my moment of truth? I feel like my attraction to men is there but it has disappeared. My mind keeps screaming I am lying about being straight and my attraction to men. It makes me feel like I like the idea of being with a woman now. My face smiles, it feels like it’s playing cruel games. I don’t see myself growing old with a woman. I know it’s OCD, but it just feels so real. I have friends and family who would accept me if I were bisexual or a lesbian. But I don’t want to. I feel like I have fed this monster even more fuel with doing mental reviews and googling. It’s like I don’t even know who I am anymore. I’ve struggled with SO-OCD in the past and was able to not think about my sexuality. But this time it just feels so real. I started sertraline yesterday. I know ERP is going to be hard work, but I’m just scared what if I’ve been in denial? I don’t want to lose another part of myself. My heart goes out to the bisexual community and how challenging it may be for them loving two or multiple genders. But I just don’t want to be with a woman. But my mind is telling me I have internalized biphobia. I just don’t want to. I hate this so much.
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