Now it’s feeling like I’m attracted to this boy in the tv show I’m watching :/ and it showed that he got a bit older? In it and I noticed his voice was deeper and now I just 🥲🙄 idk anymore if it’s attraction or not and Ive been feeling super emotional for the past couple of hours and yesterday I found out that the boy in the show is actually 20 now 😭 so idk what to think abt this Bc he’s older than me and I- idk how to explain it, I really wish I could have someone to tell my most disturbing thoughts to irl Bc I feel like no one else can understand what I’m going thru :(..

It feels like I’m faking this now :( like it’s not ocd anymore Bc it’s real and true or Bc I actually think and feel that??😭🥲

❤️💗🥲

@BlueMountain How was your day?

@BlueMountain It was good tbh, but the boy in my class who’s i figured out was 14 sat near us today and idk if All I was feeling was atttraction bc I kept getting glimpses of his face and idk if it’s also curioustity bc he has his face covered but idk what I’m trying to figure out if like 😭 idk like it feels like it every time he’s near and it’s hard bc i feel like it is :( and idk if he’s bc he looks older? Idk 😭 I just feel bad and not normal like this is me me that’s like that when I don’t want to be this and it feels like I’m denying a truth 🥲😭

@BlueMountain And feelings ?🥲

@BlueMountain It’s been awhile just wanted to say hey 👋🏽 😊 and how you are doing

@BlueMountain That’s good 😌 and also happy late thanksgiving lol 😅 I’m doing ok though

@BlueMountain It was pretty good I got eat some good ham and mash potatoes and watched a movie with my mom :). How about you?

@BlueMountain Yess and do you put cranberry sauce on yours? It’s hella good, and np ! 😊 thank youu

@BlueMountain Lmao 😂 ahh I see not your type of fruit 😭 yeah either way stuffing is delicious plain

@BlueMountain Making mash potatoes 😂😅😭 they were so good last night I decided to make them again for dinner and eat it with the left over ham I have. What about you?

@BlueMountain It’s sex and the city 😭 I just love it because of the fashion and the comedy of it

@BlueMountain Thanks !🥲🤍💙 hope you are as well !

@BlueMountain I’m not doing so well it was pretty challenging today 😅 if I’m being honest, I just feel like my thoughts and opinions changed abt the things that I care abt and used to like hate with a passion like mostly with stuff that is wrong but it seems like it’s okay or like I’m defending it or something when I have thoughts that like just idk :( 😭 it’s hard. But I’m glad that you’re doing good ! 🤍🤍

@BlueMountain Is forcing good? 😭😭 but I’ll try my best how do you do it? It’s just a scary thing yk 🥲💙

@BlueMountain Thanks 💙🥲 and ohhh I understand now 😭 it’s sooo hard how did you like even come to like be so strong and not take shit from it now?