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Being alone for the rest of my life
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How did u figure it out?
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Losing my husband
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When it started a long time ago it was social rejection, and it went away for a while, now it’s losing my husband and family.
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I think mine is social rejection (due to childhood trauma of being bullied)
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@cc97 My friend group was extremely homophobic, I was terrified if I *was* gay they would ruin me. Turned out two of them were gay themselves! And then I went on to date men and then it came back because It latches to your fears
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@Anon1294 Makes sense. Thanks for the insight!
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@Anon1294 Do you think mine could be possible bc of the childhood trauma?
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@cc97 Absolutely, I have childhood trauma as well and It does something to our brain, we become very anxious and hyper vigilant… to make sure we do not endure any more trauma.
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@Anon1294 Thank u!
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being left alone/ leaving the one i love
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How did U figure it out?
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@cc97 surprinsly talk therapy, but I am stopping that to continue with an OCD therapist
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I think I've always known but I went through CBT and i realised dating terrified me! So that's what I'm doing now (men and women 😬!) and seeing how it goes. Going ok so far
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Makes sense! Dating terrifies me too!
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@cc97 The fact that i found it so scary meant that i had to start doing it (ERP is about doing things that trigger you). I took it slow and said to myself i am just meeting new people. It helps if you are seeing a therapist, ideally a CBT one, when/if you start but you could just see how it works out...
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@N1ckn0ck Thank you!
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I don’t understand tho, because wouldn’t me protecting myself to no endure any more trauma be having no worries that I am gay bc if I had the thought then I’m gonna avoid it to not go there. But instead I have repetitive thoughts of actually being gay so how is that me protecting myself? Help!
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Not even sure it’s hocd anymore, but I don’t want to lose my partner at all. He is my bestfriend and absolutely the one I want to get married to, I can not imagine a life where is not by my side. I can’t keep doing this anymore I don’t want to hurt him :,)
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What do you think you will solve if you find out your core fear in HOCD?
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All of the podcasts I have listened to said discovering your core fear is a vital part in getting better
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- OCD Conqueror
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@cc97 Interesting. Maybe that is true. At the same time, I think giving acceptance in not knowing why you have this fear is a good way to fight the compulsions that you need to figure it out
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@Jesse Miller Also a good point! Thank you so much for that
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@cc97 You got this!
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@cc97 I hadn't heard the phrase "core fear" but it does make sense in terms of the CBT process. For me, it was important to to it with a therapist to get to my core fear. Had i done it alone i would have gone in circles latching on to different fears (which is what i have done for decades). OCD is also called "the doubting disease" and you will question everything, (including having OCD!) so it is important to have a therapist who is familiar with OCD to keep you on track. Good luck, you are on the right track
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