I left my civil services preparation (most prestigious exam of country) and will be joining a private sector job. My confidence crashed rock bottom as my OCD got triggered. Because of one guy I decided to leave preparation. But still sometimes I feel if I leave this preparation I'm going to regret my entire life. Please help me what should I do to gain back my confidence and prepare along with job? I need some advice as my doctors aren't kind to me.. they are very rude and they disconnected my call asking for money before therapy without giving me details of payment link. NOCD services aren't available in India I called them for help. Please help someone. Admins of NOCD if you all are seeing this please provide some help. I'm from India. It is not possible to pay in dollars nor can I afford much. I can pay once I start earning and I will join soon. Please help. Please. I want to build a strong career but I have a lot of confusion in my mind..my confidence is at rock bottom. I have hirsutism too and eye issues. But my OCD is making me sink. With ocd I also have depression also. I have suicidal thoughts too. I feel I'm useless and not worthy of life. That I'm wasting my parents hard earned money. Because of one guy i started repeating one thing again and again(saying one thing again and again) and I can't organize my thought well..which test series I Need to join etc..I'm in confused state of mind which never happened to me before. When I read something I find difficult to read..I understand it in 3-4 times of reading despite reading the same thing several times last year. My concentration power has declined. My emotional well being is affected. Please help me out. I need someone to listen to me and help me out. A doctor who won't judge me because ocd makes us do wrong things(sexual etc) which I personally feel I'd against my values and my family's values. At the age when I have to develop a career I'm sinking with ocd. I don't have much years to establish my career so I need help as soon as possible. Please NOCD please help me I'm from India.. I've reached out to many people and no one helped me out. Around 4-5 psychiatrists. All I got was Anti depressants and I kept sleeping and my concentration too declined. Please help. Please. I don't have any hope left. I know it's just another effort in vain. I don't want to die. I but I can't live either with a life of no dignity and confidence. Please help me. Please. Please.

Mak2022

Date posted: 4y

I am so sorry for what you are going through, OCD is a monster! I mentioned this is an earlier post, but the reason why these thoughts bother you so much is because it is so far from your character. If you really did believe these thoughts you wouldn't care and find yourself relating to it. Just know that your intrusive thoughts say nothing about who you are as a person. OCD cannot make you do anything you don't want to do. I know our mind tries to trick us, but we have to take our mind back from OCD. The only way to combat OCD is to not feed into the thoughts. It's going to be hard, but just the simple fact that we deal with something as scary as OCD every day means we are stronger than we let ourselves believe and can overcome it. There is no cure for OCD because intrusive thoughts happen to everyone, they just brush it off and people with OCD think it has something to do with their character. I have actually heard a friend of mine who doesn't have OCD describe having an intrusive thought. The difference is they acknowledge the thought as weird, brush it off, and don't think about it again. Our intrusive thoughts keep coming back because we obsess over them. Then we try compulsions to make them go away. Avoidance is a compulsion. The only way to fight this monster is to face it head on. You are not your thoughts. It's your OCD not you. I believe in you and I know you've got this! Go out there and be great!

nayan14

Date posted: 4y

My mother too has the same issue. So my parents fight a lot over it. I don't want such a life for myself. I'll try not to do compulsions and face my obsessions with a calm mind that they are part of everyone's life and they too will pass. Thank you so much mak2022. Can we connect?

[Deleted]

Date posted: 4y

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nayan14

Date posted: 4y

There is nothing I can do. I don't know how to get rid of it.

nayan14

Date posted: 4y

@Dialup I know what makes me behave abnormally. Relationships. It means I can't get married? When I get into them..I start repeating one thing again and again. Those are my compulsions. It is not a very big thing but the impact it causes is tremendous which I mentioned above. I repeat things so many times that the person leaves me.

Mak2022

Date posted: 4y

Yeah of course! Do you have instagram

nayan14

Date posted: 4y

https://www.instagram.com/nayansaxena14/ 😃

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