I left my civil services preparation (most prestigious exam of country) and will be joining a private sector job. My confidence crashed rock bottom as my OCD got triggered. Because of one guy I decided to leave preparation. But still sometimes I feel if I leave this preparation I'm going to regret my entire life. Please help me what should I do to gain back my confidence and prepare along with job? I need some advice as my doctors aren't kind to me.. they are very rude and they disconnected my call asking for money before therapy without giving me details of payment link. NOCD services aren't available in India I called them for help. Please help someone. Admins of NOCD if you all are seeing this please provide some help. I'm from India. It is not possible to pay in dollars nor can I afford much. I can pay once I start earning and I will join soon. Please help. Please. I want to build a strong career but I have a lot of confusion in my mind..my confidence is at rock bottom. I have hirsutism too and eye issues. But my OCD is making me sink. With ocd I also have depression also. I have suicidal thoughts too. I feel I'm useless and not worthy of life. That I'm wasting my parents hard earned money. Because of one guy i started repeating one thing again and again(saying one thing again and again) and I can't organize my thought well..which test series I Need to join etc..I'm in confused state of mind which never happened to me before. When I read something I find difficult to read..I understand it in 3-4 times of reading despite reading the same thing several times last year. My concentration power has declined. My emotional well being is affected. Please help me out. I need someone to listen to me and help me out. A doctor who won't judge me because ocd makes us do wrong things(sexual etc) which I personally feel I'd against my values and my family's values. At the age when I have to develop a career I'm sinking with ocd. I don't have much years to establish my career so I need help as soon as possible. Please NOCD please help me I'm from India.. I've reached out to many people and no one helped me out. Around 4-5 psychiatrists. All I got was Anti depressants and I kept sleeping and my concentration too declined. Please help. Please. I don't have any hope left. I know it's just another effort in vain. I don't want to die. I but I can't live either with a life of no dignity and confidence. Please help me. Please. Please.

This isn’t OCD related so I’m sorry, but I don’t know another platform like this where I can talk to other people and actually get responses. OCD has been a huge fucking setback for me in life. I had to drop classes, wasn’t able to do things, and just felt so shitty all the time because of it. I feel like I blame OCD for everything I’m not. I constantly feel like I’m not good enough. Just today I saw someone I once knew and felt all of those feelings I used to have that made me miserable. Anyways, I tried taking my driver’s test a couple days ago but I wasn’t able to. The DMV only accepted cash. I felt upset but it was whatever. I’m almost 19, and I don’t have a driver’s license. So passing it would mean a lot to me. I compare myself to others my age; they have cars, hobbies, friends, go to college, etc… I don’t have any of that. Maybe comparing myself and all of that is my fault. My family says it’s my fault I’m sad because I just wallow in it. Hearing them say that makes me frustrated and hurt, but maybe they’re right. My mom texted a couple of my siblings in a group chat I wasn’t a part of, “He wants to wallow and be depressed. And woe is me, wah wah wah.” That made me really angry because my siblings were agreeing with her. Maybe they are right. Maybe I am selfish and think the world revolves around me. My sister tells me I need to advocate for myself more, I just don’t want to be a burden. I’ve only been a burden my whole life. My OCD created this whole issue in my family and I hate that. I don’t know what to do anymore. I just want an answer. Am I really a loser? Do I really wallow in it? Am I not trying like my family says? I just want to talk to someone.

I had to cancel my therapy because it was no longer available with my insurance. And I just kind of feel hopeless with OCD. Even when I was doing therapy, I think my OCD started getting too complicated for my therapist and she didn’t even know what to do. My fears are so complex it’s crazy. So my big fear is my OCD being bad and being super depressed again like I was a few months ago in high school. I attended a public highschool for a semester and started the worst flare up I’ve ever had. I was harshly bullied for no reason whatsoever, and not accepted by anyone. I am an athletic kid who usually keeps to himself so I didn’t understand why people targeted me, especially when I wanted nothing to do with them. From August to now ( March) I CANNOT grasp hold of my OCD. I am very hard on myself about it. Going into dangers anytime I see one so I can expose myself. But constantly obsessing about if I’m doing enough for my OCD. And comparing myself to how I use to be, before the flare ups. From the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep I’m obsessing about my OCD and if it’s bad and comparing. Another HUGE fear of mine is being treated differently because I have OCD. So being bullied for so long I always assumed it was because I was shy and didn’t want to stand up for myself - due to my OCD- so I blamed myself for everything that continued to happen, . from people bullying me in the past . The people at that highschool were downright crazy. Even the teachers and coaches had major issues and I’m so glad to be out of there, but I still obsess the same everyday and hold so much resentment for that school and when I try to let it go, I just feel more passive pain and obsess even more about it weather my ocd is okay or not. I feel mentally sick. Please someone give me some advice for my fears, because I feel like I’m doing everything in my power to expose myself to everything but nothings working.

Hi ❤️ I’m really struggling right now I’m in my sophomore year of Highschool and I’ve finally started planning or thinking abt my future (for context I was extremely depressed and suicidal from 6-9th grade) After conquering my depression this is a huge leap for me and I’m proud of myself ❤️ But there’s something still holding me down :( and I’m not sure what to do anymore that thing is OCD. Since 6th grade I have had strong and invasive intrusive thoughts all the time they scare me so bad and make me feel as though I’m not even real anymore :( I’m sick of taking the time to do ridiculous compulsions to rid or ease these thoughts it’s a waste of time and energy and it hurts me so bad I feel like I will never get to just live my life without this :( How can I plan my future when I can’t even find myself in this mess of anxiety 💔 I’m so tired of fighting my mental health it’s been years from anxiety attacks to sh to survived suicide attempts (I got help dw❤️‍🩹) and recovery there. Just to be thrown into a storm of awful scary sickening thoughts day and night-when can I just be a normal teenager and possibly a happy adult? How do I conquer this so I can love myself to the fullest and live my life free and happy? :( ❤️❤️‍🩹 I’m so scared to talk to my parents about it I’m ashamed of my thoughts and every time I bring it up they just say I shouldn’t be diagnosing myself or it’s just ADHD. It really really hurts me they have no idea how awful this feels and it makes me feel so alone sometimes 💔