- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I just recently told my boyfriend of 3 months about mine. I had the article pulled up on my phone so I could show him, and I wanted to tell him something before I showed it to him. But I couldn't find the right words to introduce the concept to him. I wanted to say something like "I'm not dangerous" or "I'm not actually attracted to these people," but those things would've simply made him apprehensive, I felt. So at some point, I finally just handed him my phone and let him read the NOCD article that explains it. He was accepting and very sweet about it. I would say to get to know the person you're dating and make sure you're on the same wavelength emotionally and commitment-wise. If they truly like who you are, they'll understand that the disorder is *not* you.
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes agreed! POCD is particularly tricky since there are even psychologists and psychiatrists who aren’t well educated on it. I found myself saying to my partner over and over again “it’s important that you understand I don’t want this… It’s important that you understand these thoughts make me want to end my life” before I could actually show him the paper that said the word pedophilia on it
- Date posted
- 3y
I carefully and slowly explained OCD and then POCD to my boyfriend. He freaked out at first, but then asked some questions then understood.
- Date posted
- 3y
I can definitely relate. I kept it from my partner for six years and didn’t feel safe telling him until I was secure in a therapy program. Take your time, it’s not lying. He already knew about some of my other subtypes so I had printed out some articles and materials to share with him so he would have some “proof” that pocd is real. (Since that’s the biggest fear right?) I had a 30 minute panic attack in the fetal position on the floor before I could get the words out. It was one of the hardest things I’ve done. BUT he was very supportive and understanding and it is such a huge relief to have my person understand me and truly see me for the first time. I was worried he was going to be upset that I kept it from him and “lied” but he straight up said “don’t be ridiculous, I’m really glad you shared this with me” I feel very lucky to have this kind of support so I hope the same for you all. It’s made a huge difference in my ERP therapy as well because I have someone holding me accountable
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 18w
Hi all! I was wondering if anyone being treated with ROCD and/or SOOCD has some advice on how they handle the things *with* their partner. For context, my ex and I were together ~7 months before we broke up a year ago, in large part due to my severe anxiety from untreated ROCD/SOOCD. I’ve gotten a lot better through NOCD treatment and we’ve been friends since then. But we’re currently in a “situationship” kind of stage, where I think we’re both trying to figure out if the relationship is still feasible, and I’m finding that I’m a lot more triggered as the relationship nears becoming “serious” again. We’re both really trying to figure out the healthiest way to handle when things get hard for me. Does anyone have input about what they’ve learned or found what has worked in their own relationships? Some specific questions: - I’ve found that when getting really triggered in my own head, I have no clue if I should explain how I’m feeling to my partner or how we should address it together. How do you differentiate between communicating versus falling into the confessing/reassurance trap? - Related to the above, my partner and I are both a bit lost on the best way for him to respond when I’m really paranoid (for examples, I have major I’m-being-cheated-on paranoia and overanalyze if I’m enjoying sex enough), or if I’m overreacting to feeling rejected/misunderstood (e.g. “he didn’t respond to my comment just now, he doesn’t care/he doesn’t get me/maybe we shouldn’t be together…”) - How much does your partner know about ROCD/SOOCD in general? How much have you shared with them about your thoughts and experiences? I’ve explained both subtypes and some of my thought processes to him, but definitely not all of it, and I’m not sure how much is helpful for him to know. Answers to any or all of the questions are very much appreciated. Thanks so much in advance! Hope you’re all well 💗
- Date posted
- 15w
Hi all, I would really appreciate some advice on how you told a loved one about having ocd, specifically a significant other. I’ve been with mine for over 5 years, and I just had a recent diagnosis of OCD. To be honest, with the subtype I have, it’s really crippling to deal with, and I have a major worry of my partner not understanding the subtype. I would love to get some advice on how to best approach it and how to provide understanding that I’m still the same person. Thanks!
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 11w
I have been in ERP therapy for my OCD for nearly a year now. Before my diagnosis and doing ERP, I really didn't drive a car for five years and rarely left the house. Now I drive to work, coffee and other outings. Most of the people close in my life don’t really know about my OCD. They do see me doing lots of things I haven't done in the past. I don't really know if I should explain about why this progress happened. I hope they don't think I was just being lazy up until then. They will talk about how someone is “so OCD” because they keep their room clean and really enjoy things neat. Anytime I hear this, I just think that if they hear about my diagnosis of OCD and what it entails they will think I’m crazy. I feel very conflicted about how to go about this, so advice is welcome.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond