- Username
- ImagineSisyphusHappy
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I just recently told my boyfriend of 3 months about mine. I had the article pulled up on my phone so I could show him, and I wanted to tell him something before I showed it to him. But I couldn't find the right words to introduce the concept to him. I wanted to say something like "I'm not dangerous" or "I'm not actually attracted to these people," but those things would've simply made him apprehensive, I felt. So at some point, I finally just handed him my phone and let him read the NOCD article that explains it. He was accepting and very sweet about it. I would say to get to know the person you're dating and make sure you're on the same wavelength emotionally and commitment-wise. If they truly like who you are, they'll understand that the disorder is *not* you.
Yes agreed! POCD is particularly tricky since there are even psychologists and psychiatrists who aren’t well educated on it. I found myself saying to my partner over and over again “it’s important that you understand I don’t want this… It’s important that you understand these thoughts make me want to end my life” before I could actually show him the paper that said the word pedophilia on it
I carefully and slowly explained OCD and then POCD to my boyfriend. He freaked out at first, but then asked some questions then understood.
I can definitely relate. I kept it from my partner for six years and didn’t feel safe telling him until I was secure in a therapy program. Take your time, it’s not lying. He already knew about some of my other subtypes so I had printed out some articles and materials to share with him so he would have some “proof” that pocd is real. (Since that’s the biggest fear right?) I had a 30 minute panic attack in the fetal position on the floor before I could get the words out. It was one of the hardest things I’ve done. BUT he was very supportive and understanding and it is such a huge relief to have my person understand me and truly see me for the first time. I was worried he was going to be upset that I kept it from him and “lied” but he straight up said “don’t be ridiculous, I’m really glad you shared this with me” I feel very lucky to have this kind of support so I hope the same for you all. It’s made a huge difference in my ERP therapy as well because I have someone holding me accountable
I’m afraid to date with this disorder. I got diagnosed about 2 months ago. I’m on medications and doing erp. I feel like the whole subject is so taboo I have a hard time talking to my own mother about it. I’ve told my best friend but I don’t know how to talk to someone “new” about this. It’s so shameful I cry almost every day. I never had to deal with this disorder in previous relationships. I’ve been out of my previous relationship for about 8 months. The Pocd became unbearable about 5 or so months ago. I’ve been asked out on dates but I’m completely afraid of being triggered and talking about it. Any advice?
How do you guys connect with your significant others without scaring them about your ocd? I want to be open but it's hard to know what is too much... thanks
At what point in dating do you let your (potential) partner know that you have OCD? I’d like to start dating this year but sometimes I feel like I need to be in a better place to do that? Also I feel like if I actually get into a relationship and I don’t say anything about it that I’m hiding some dark secret. Any thoughts/experiences?
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