Something really stressful is happening to me and I need your advice. in fact tomorrow i will start again the sport i stopped because of the pandemic, cheerleading. in the team there is a person who is lesbian and on whom my hocd it was attached a few years ago and I really want to start again because I like her but I already know that I am going to have a bad time and I don't want that to change what I have with my boyfriend

Its really kinf od you for responsding on my post thanks it means a lot! I had my first pratique tonifht and it was difficult but i manage to finish it! Or course at thé end i had a lot of thoufhts about that same person ans i was avares to go to sleep but i did it

Hi is it okay if we talk about SOOCD?

@missbluesky Yes sure

@S.verv20 How long have you had HOCD?

@missbluesky I think it’s since like primary, 11-12 years old but I’m questioning my self if it was really that at that moment and you?

@S.verv20 I was 12 years old too! It’s honestly such a trigger for me, because I feel like because that’s the age most people find out they’re gay that it couldn’t have been ocd.

@missbluesky Yes same! What trigger you the most and what is the thoughts that you hate the most

@S.verv20 Things that I have done/ that have happened in the past that feel like very clear indicators that I’m at the very least bisexual. What about you?

@missbluesky Same, when I was young and also friend that I have, they are huge trigger for me because my head tell me that I like them so im afraid to have new friends and I’m afraid of people touching me! What helps you the most

@S.verv20 Nothing, really. My HOCD is on and off in terms of severity. When it’s better, it’s still In the back of my mind. I’m never really free of it.

@missbluesky Same, I never had a break like I always think of it. Each time I do something or I see something or I say something it’s always there to see if I’m okay or I’m not lying etc

@S.verv20 Are you able to function in like your day to day life? I worry that because I still have the thoughts but can live my life to a okay extent without serious anxiety that it’s not ocd and that I’m just in denial.

@missbluesky Yes i can live my life like normal but it’s always there but I have a lot of problem to do activities with my family because I always have the feeling that I’m lying and they will be mad etc

@S.verv20 I just feel so scared because the anxiety is so minor but the thoughts remain

@S.verv20 It really feels like I’ve been in denial since I was 12

@missbluesky Yes same!

@S.verv20 Are you followed by a professional ?

@S.verv20 I have gone through NOCD erp twice but I’ve never fully committed to it. I always am doing compulsions the whole time

@S.verv20 Are you diagnosed?

@missbluesky No i have not been diagnosed because I lives in Quebec and It’s very difficult to find someone like a therapist who is in ocd like I have seen 4 therapist but none understood what I had the whole time

@S.verv20 Do you have things that have happened in your past that you feel mean you’re lesbian/bi?

@missbluesky Yes i have when I was younger and a lot of dream too why?

@S.verv20 I do too. It just seems like there’s too much evidence pointing to me being bisexual for me to ignore these thoughts, especially because it’s been happening since I was 12.

@missbluesky Are you in a relationship

@S.verv20 No. Are you?