- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Seeking reassurance is a compulsion. It doesn't matter if you get it from your counselor or give it to yourself. Doing a compulsion does relieve your anxiety, but it only lasts a very short time. It also teaches your brain that the thought truly is a threat. Your brain will respond by giving you the same thought even more. It also makes your OCD words. More intrusive thoughts leads to more anxiety, which leads to more compulsions. Also, you can NEVER satisfy OCD. No matter how many compulsions you do, OCD will always say "Yeah, but what about _______?" Does your therapist understand OCD? The fact that she is willing to give you reassurance tells me she probably doesn't. A therapist that understands OCD would not give you reassurance. Traditional talk therapy does not work for OCD and does more harm than good
- Date posted
- 3y
Two things: 1: This is what ERP is for, by exposing yourself to a situation that OCD is telling you is bad acknowledging, but not responding to the thought, over time A) you will have the thoughts less B) you will be able to function C) If you still have them, they will seem less scary 2: Over time, I have come to notice when my brain is anxious and I may not be able to think fully rationally. Sometimes I can feel (or it seems like I can) whatever chemicals/hormones/whatever are being released that make me anxious. Sometimes I know Im in a situation where I cant see the way out, but it is at this point I have to acknowledge that there probably is a rational way to think about it, and simply wait it out until my mind has cleared up to the point where I can think clearly. So I carry on with whatever normal activity I was doing before that occurred and try not to fixate it too much.
- Date posted
- 3y
Absolutely. I am just trying to get to a place where I don’t have the thought and immediately feel the need to share with my therapist so I can get my reassurance. I agree with you though!
- Date posted
- 3y
I can relate so much. I think I have to work more on my willingness to lean into the uncertainty, to allow the discomfort of not solving the "problem."
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Hey everyone, I just wanted to share something I’ve been struggling with, especially around making decisions. It’s really hard for me to feel confident in the choices I make, even when I know what the right thing is. I constantly find myself needing validation from others—whether it’s about something small or something really important. For example, at my job, I might know exactly what I’m doing and have done it right a bunch of times, but I still feel the need to double-check with someone or ask if it’s okay. It’s like this fear kicks in, and I start imagining worst-case scenarios—like what if I mess up and someone gets hurt, and then I get blamed or even end up in jail or prison. I know that sounds extreme, but these thoughts just come automatically, and they feel so real in the moment. This has been going on for maybe a year or two now. Even outside of work, the same thing happens. Like recently, I’ve been trying to figure out a gym schedule—my girlfriend wants to go with me, and I’m trying to plan the times and make it all work. But instead of just choosing what works best for me, I overthink it. I go back and forth in my head, and I ask other people what they think, even though deep down I know this is something I should be deciding for myself. It’s my life, but I still need that reassurance from others, and I don’t really know why. It’s exhausting to always doubt myself and to feel like one wrong choice could lead to something terrible. I’m trying to work through it, but I just wanted to put it out there and see if anyone else deals with this or has advice. Thanks for reading.
- Date posted
- 15w
I know the solution is to always say “yeah that could be true, but I am choosing to live my life anyway.” However, I feel like my biggest issue is my brain always assuming that it is immediately true when I do that. Like if I say “maybe I’m attracted to teenagers, it’s possible,” then my brain INSTANTLY starts rationalizing that thought and defending it and being like “oh okay so you think this now and it makes sense because xyz, and now that’s who you are and your real desire is now and always will be teenagers.” I feel really alone in this area of feeling like my brain “accepting the thoughts” means my brain immediately accepts them as true. I obviously don’t want to think they’re true but I feel so stuck now.
- Date posted
- 9w
This is my first time posting on here, and it’s sorta a general question. I genuinely don’t know what to do with myself when my emotions take over from a thought. I know the basics of ERP work is to sit with your feelings, label it and let your thoughts pass, but even when I try to indulge in good distractions and avoid the thought, the feeling still lingers and I can’t help but vent to my partner about it. I can see it’s affecting him and our relationship. I’ve tried journaling, going out for a run, breathing exercises, labeling my thoughts and feelings, but I’m still left restless and unable to sleep because my frustrations and anxieties get too strong. I listened to a recent podcast on reassurance seeking, and she says that a study shows that venting has ZERO benefits. The host says she journals or records herself venting to avoid “bottling it up” and she acknowledges that others may also be going through their own things. I want to be able to ride the wave on my own and practice these tools in the process, but does anyone else have any advice that helps them? TLDR: My feelings get too strong and leaves me restless. I’m seeking advice on what other strategies I can use to cope with my emotions on my own, besides journaling, going for a run, breathing exercises and labeling my thoughts/feelings.
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