- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Seeking reassurance is a compulsion. It doesn't matter if you get it from your counselor or give it to yourself. Doing a compulsion does relieve your anxiety, but it only lasts a very short time. It also teaches your brain that the thought truly is a threat. Your brain will respond by giving you the same thought even more. It also makes your OCD words. More intrusive thoughts leads to more anxiety, which leads to more compulsions. Also, you can NEVER satisfy OCD. No matter how many compulsions you do, OCD will always say "Yeah, but what about _______?" Does your therapist understand OCD? The fact that she is willing to give you reassurance tells me she probably doesn't. A therapist that understands OCD would not give you reassurance. Traditional talk therapy does not work for OCD and does more harm than good
- Date posted
- 3y
Two things: 1: This is what ERP is for, by exposing yourself to a situation that OCD is telling you is bad acknowledging, but not responding to the thought, over time A) you will have the thoughts less B) you will be able to function C) If you still have them, they will seem less scary 2: Over time, I have come to notice when my brain is anxious and I may not be able to think fully rationally. Sometimes I can feel (or it seems like I can) whatever chemicals/hormones/whatever are being released that make me anxious. Sometimes I know Im in a situation where I cant see the way out, but it is at this point I have to acknowledge that there probably is a rational way to think about it, and simply wait it out until my mind has cleared up to the point where I can think clearly. So I carry on with whatever normal activity I was doing before that occurred and try not to fixate it too much.
- Date posted
- 3y
Absolutely. I am just trying to get to a place where I don’t have the thought and immediately feel the need to share with my therapist so I can get my reassurance. I agree with you though!
- Date posted
- 3y
I can relate so much. I think I have to work more on my willingness to lean into the uncertainty, to allow the discomfort of not solving the "problem."
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Does anyone else experience a moment of clarity where you feel strong relief that the intrusive thought isn’t true, only to then immediately start questioning if you’ve only convinced yourself that because you don’t want the thought to be true? I’m pretty confident it would take some crazy mental gymnastics to actually successfully convince myself I didn’t do something that I deep down knew I did, but every time I resist the compulsions and try to sit with the uncertainty or tell myself to think about what is logical, I usually briefly know that this probably didn’t happen but am unable to move on out of fear I’m just in denial and have convinced myself of that.
- Date posted
- 23w
Hi Everyone! I hope whoever is reading this is having a good day so far :) So for years now I’ve had very bad intrusive thoughts about things that I have done or embarrassing things that I’ve said or have happened and it’s mortifying and debilitating on a daily basis. Specifically these thoughts are mainly things that have occurred from 2018-2020 and some are more simple just as a stupid joke I made or being way too loud on calls while my family was trying to sleep and others being way more complex such as past relationships and how I’ve hurt some of the people I care the most about and when I have acted on intrusive thoughts and these thoughts will appear with no triggers at all I’ll just wake up and already have something I did just nagging me. I don’t want to live like this anymore and I’ve tried working through it with self compassion but sometimes the things I said or did back then it’s very hard to forgive myself for and I’ll reminisce on it for hours on hours, gaslight myself into believing that’s not how it happened and try to change the memory itself, or just suppress it entirely. I know those habits aren’t healthy and truly I want to get better but I don’t know how to overcome some of these thoughts. I have talked to my fiancé about this a few times and even today we talked about it and he fully supports me and is helping me work through it. I might also contact my sister too, I don’t talk to her overly too much but ever since I was little she’s thought I’ve had ocd and was one of the people who made me consider that I might have it (I’m still undiagnosed but I’ll try to when I have the money and time) and I know she could maybe provide some insight. Another thing that is troublesome about the situation is my other family members specifically my mom aren’t the most helpful and can trigger thoughts. To put it in perspective on how her thought process is and some background info she is an ER nurse and has been for 30 years due to this she believes she knows mainly everything there is about mental health and she gets extremely upset when I don’t take her advice or set boundaries. She’ll force me to talk to her about my problems and when I don’t want to she’ll pin me in a corner where I’m forced to and last summer I had a really bad episode and was really overstimulated and I just finished taking a shower and due to the water on me, my hair being wet (my hair is naturally curly and it takes forever to dry and it’s very draining taking care of even with a keratin treatment) and all the intrusive thoughts I was having and she forced me to talk to her and I did open up for the first time about my thoughts and brought up how sometimes I have thoughts of hurting my animals and it makes me physically sick. Her response to this was threatening to call the cops on me saying it was a behavioral thing and I was doing it for attention. I have never hurt any of my animals but later that day my cat came into my room and a few minutes later she comes up just gives me the death stare and after a few seconds just asks me “are you going to go kill snickers?” In the most condescending tone and she’s always like this daily where she’ll force advice onto me or get upset and yell and then reinforce thoughts I’m having. I just want to know first how to stop the thoughts from so frequently and how to heal in an environmental where it keeps reopening wounds despite trying to place boundaries? I’m sorry this is really long I usually do go really in detail about things and it’s just how I’ve always been. If anyone has any questions feel free to ask and I’ll answer them to the best of my ability. I really appreciate the time you took to read this and thank you for your help! 🥰
- Date posted
- 19w
Hey everyone, I just wanted to share something I’ve been struggling with, especially around making decisions. It’s really hard for me to feel confident in the choices I make, even when I know what the right thing is. I constantly find myself needing validation from others—whether it’s about something small or something really important. For example, at my job, I might know exactly what I’m doing and have done it right a bunch of times, but I still feel the need to double-check with someone or ask if it’s okay. It’s like this fear kicks in, and I start imagining worst-case scenarios—like what if I mess up and someone gets hurt, and then I get blamed or even end up in jail or prison. I know that sounds extreme, but these thoughts just come automatically, and they feel so real in the moment. This has been going on for maybe a year or two now. Even outside of work, the same thing happens. Like recently, I’ve been trying to figure out a gym schedule—my girlfriend wants to go with me, and I’m trying to plan the times and make it all work. But instead of just choosing what works best for me, I overthink it. I go back and forth in my head, and I ask other people what they think, even though deep down I know this is something I should be deciding for myself. It’s my life, but I still need that reassurance from others, and I don’t really know why. It’s exhausting to always doubt myself and to feel like one wrong choice could lead to something terrible. I’m trying to work through it, but I just wanted to put it out there and see if anyone else deals with this or has advice. Thanks for reading.
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