Why is soocd so confusing?? Anyone else’s OCD just bring up past experiences and make you believe that it could mean you’re the opposite sexual orientation you are? I identify as a straight female but in the past I had thoughts I could have been bi so it made me think I was even though I’ve never actually liked a girl? Idk. I’m so confused. I’m not attracted to women, I’ve always been super boy crazy. I just feel super alone in this regardless of all the similar experiences other people go through. I can’t watch tv, work is really hard because I have to talk to other women, certain clothes trigger me, hanging out with friends is hard, being lovey to my boyfriend is hard, even looking at myself is hard. I don’t feel like me. I’m just so confused and so lost. My OCD really sparked back in October and since it’s just gotten progressively worse. I have therapy today, and I’m looking forward to it. Anxiety and OCD is so hard. It effects me of every moment of every day, in everything I do. Im just so tired. Anyone have exposures that may help with this??

I’m okay. My main compulsions have been reassurance so I’m doing my best to not give into those. I understand spiraling..sometimes it all just feels so real😞

Thank you for sharing! I’m 18, and have been going through this since October and got diagnosed about 2 weeks ago. It is very scary and uncomfortable but recovery is possible!

Thank you for sharing that. I understand. It is super hard and distressing. We can get through this!

@Anonymous A gay friend that I have really calmed me down with this situation and explained that he never had erections towards girls or that he never had a real interest in one and that is completely different from me

Thank you!

@Anonymous You’re loved, you’re awesome, give yourself grace

I’m in the same boat right now🙋🏻‍♀️I’m currently trying to not react to the thoughts and when I do have an intrusive thought I’ll say to myself “maybe I am, maybe I’m not. I don’t need to figure out right now. What I need to do is *whatever you’re doing in the moment*” I feel like OCD takes me completely out of reality causing me to feel like someone I’m not. I’m constantly doubting who I am, but that is the nature of OCD.

@Anonymous That maybe i am and maybe not kills me… like if maybe i am then what do i do? I consciously feel like i am forcing ocd and forcing to be in ocd whereas the truth is something else… and its like i will forget these thoughts in a while and not care and is that what ocd is?!? Or are they thoughts true and I don’t care like what is it?!?

@Anonymous Also because of lack of resources I haven’t been diagnosed yet so idk if this is ocd at all and all in my head and just me in denial like who can tell me what do i do?! Where do i go? And what if i go to therapy and it turns out it was never ocd and its just my mind telling me its ocd and its actually denial?!

@Brave through I understand..the maybe, maybe not causes a lot of anxiety but I’m like “I don’t even want the possibility that I could be bi/lesbian” …it’s very confusing. Do you have a therapist?

@Brave through Sorry just saw this!

@Brave through Before I was diagnosed with OCD I had the same exact thoughts!! One of my main intrusive thoughts is also “will I just figure out that I’m in denial and it was never OCD” ..it’s very difficult. Personally, my therapist isn’t from NOCD but I would suggest setting up a call through NOCD. It can be very hard at first but it will be worth it.

@Anonymous i am struggling. . I can't deal with this anymore and feels like i am experiencing something i was scared of and it wasn't denial like my cominv out Irocess or something and its feels like its my truth and i am just crying cause not pf anxiety but of shock And overwhelmed its like what if and this what if is a big possibility Liking the same sex personality wise emotionally is that false attraction cause of ocd?!? What if its not.and I don't know if its true or not?!? Like i feel like that?!? And thats like the biggest proof and my fear coming true cause there's nothing to combat or fight this…how do i know not more than friends? What telling me its just as friends??Noticing and stuffing just adds to it? And if its not intrusive and on hangout basis and then everything is true then.. all this ocd was a lie and i was lying to myself and i feel like this thought doesn't give me anxiety but i feel scared in an overwhelming way and like not anxious like its my truth?! Would i feel better if I accept it whether its true or not?! What do i do?? This can't be ocd?! I am so numb and confused rn…how can this be ocd!! And this doesn’t even feel like ocd and i would ask this only if i think there’s possibility and like also that I believe in it and might have in the past had it and never knew… otherwise why would i even have this thought or ask this and like what do i do i am sorry for venting ig i just needed someone to talk to

@Brave through I get it. I have a lot of the same thoughts and feelings. Take some deep breaths, I would suggest to schedule a call with NOCD, the first call is free and they’ll go over the concerns you’re having, and any questions you have. They’re very understanding.

@Anonymous Thankyou:)) I appreciate the help