I think all the stress is making me dislike my time with my girlfriend. I love her but the ocd is legitimately debilitating. Any help ?

How do you feel when you're with her? What kind of thoughts are running through your head?

Lately, I've been overthinking everything. "She touched my chest. I should like that" basically that for everything. I can have a good time with sex but it feels like I can't finish you know

I do know, do you feel like you're enjoying it and then you over think it and you stop enjoying it?

Yep. Every time

I've had issues with that as well. I've come to realize when you spend your time thinking you're not really giving yourself a chance to feel anything but the feelings that come from the thing you're thinking about. How long have you been going through this?

2 ish years

It's been over 3 for me now. The first year was with my ex and the last 2 plus years have been with my wife. To be honest I'm not even convinced rocd exists anymore. However if it does, there is no way on hell I don't have it lol. I noticed it says sexual orientation ocd as well. Do you have thoughts that you may be gay and if so what makes you feel that way?

I get alot of arousal and physical sensations when I think of men. I don't like it and I've tried to accept it but I just don't want to be with a guy

Have you always found guys attractive?

If it makes you both feel any better I had to check nearly every box when I downloaded this app. Ocd thoughts manifest in so many different ways The clue for myself that it’s my ocd and not really true is if a thought is obsessive chances are it’s probably also rooted in my ocd. Whether it be relationship wise, related to being a parent, identifying false threats in people, false memories, purity ocd, religious ocd, afraid my thoughts will become real if they’re a bad one etc chances are if you’re sitting here analyzing and questioning it’s the ocd these are more subsects of ocd thoughts and actions but it’s all ocd

Thanks man, that was nice to read

Yeah, I needed that

@Exoduslevi It will help to stop analyzing yourself These are just thought you have and don’t have to act on them or even believe them. They are distressing to you because ocd likes to make you think what is most scary to you. A small thought or fear becomes something to analyze something to “make true” rather than how lost people can say “geesh that was a weird thought” and move on. We can’t do that. So often times a normal thought or random brain poop I call it will lead to us questioning what it means, we then give it power as if it is “real”, we then fear it more, which causes more distress, which causes us to obsess etc etc When you get the urge to “check your thoughts or actions or feelings” to “make sure you are or aren’t something” That’s the time to try and distract and avoid tell yourself brain no. I don’t need to solve anything let the thoughts Pass try and not put more analyszing into the physical and emotional discomfort the thoughts cause I used to have to hide all the knives in my house at night. Then I realize o didn’t “have” to I just did it because it made me feel better. By not allowing myself to do that anymore I have slowly learned to deal with that one fear. Many others take its place and the fear still exists except I am better at allowing that fear to flow through me and have stop compulsions to alleviate it etc Find the areas in which you comulse mentally or even physcially and try your best to slowly try and do something else when those issues arise—art, reading, singing, walking anything to distract. He talking to yourself out loud if you had to. And it sound silly but if I have to I say inside my head like scream it stop stop and distract every single time it happens. Eventually things slowly get better and even thought the thoughts will always be there you’ll get better at not giving into analyzing them. And the soecific thoughts will occur less. The more you can learn not to “fear” whatever it is you’re thinking the less power your ocd will have. I try just saying to myself so what! I’m in control of my actions and who I want to be. And I repeat that type thing a lot when it gets bad

@hurticanekat524 Thanks man

@hurticanekat524 - Very well said! Sums up OCD’s bullying, and how to cope with it and recovery so well. I still have to verbally shout at myself sometimes when I notice I am giving into my compulsions. The thoughts never truly go away, but eventually the volume on them has gotten turned down and they don’t cause me nearly as much anxiety as they used to. And @Exoduslevi, my OCD definitely gets much worse when I am stressed and/or tired. I have had those times when the intrusive thoughts or just some minor distraction while I am being intimate with my girlfriend will take me down a rabbit hole and complete take me out of the moment and I absolutely hate it. Trying to not focus or give those thoughts any weight is definitely key, but it so much easier said than done.

@BK when it does that does it feel like its so much real and u feel like it will always feels that way with your girlfriend ? Because ive been doing erp for a week now and i dont get as much anxiety and i have more strength in me to say " Yea maybe, youre funny" to my thoughts to give it less importance but yet i still feel like theres something "wrong" or i cant feel the love or be peaceful with it n feel like i rather just be having the anxiety 24/7 because atleast then it makes me feel like om fighting it, meaning that i love her

@DB444 It will get better you’re in a really bad spot right now I go through phases like this and YES I DO FEEL YHE LOVE AGAIN AND FEEL BETTER in moments that I do not give my ocd power. It will take a lot of work but once this bad blip passes you will be able to see more clearly For now just know you can’t really think clear just take it one second at a time. If your kissing and you find yourself analyzing etc try to being yourself back into the moment and say ok I cannot enjoy love or feel it if I’m battling my own mind every second and. It allowing myself to “feel” I hope that makes sense and gives you comfort. And you will question the comfort it gives you but you’re ok. It will all be ok.