- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Right so this is probably not going to be helpful and I’m trying not to give you reassurance but just know that the fact u have tried to rationalize this so much here means that it is ocd. What u have to do now is leave the thoughts in your head but don’t entertain them or try to rationalize them further. Just sit with the feeling maybe or maybe not which is REALLY horrible I know but trust me is the only way to get better. TLDR sit with the thoughts don’t entertain them and just let them pass by like clouds.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I don’t know if this helps at all, because it’s a form of reassurance… but you said you’re 21 and 18 yr olds are actually in the same age range as you. 3 years is not a huge age difference so it’s not weird to be attracted to guys around your age. It’s the people who are older who target younger people and take advantage of them for control and harm. You’re just sexually exploring, I don’t think it’s wrong to have a small age gap
- Date posted
- 3y ago
irl i definitely get that and usually stick within a year or two in age range for people i date. It’s just in these fantasies it’s like late high school aged i guess because that’s what society portrays as “a normal and preferred” time for guys to lose their virginity. Even though of course it’s different for everyone. But like i said irl i don’t even really have any urge or want to take anyones virginity, i don’t even really enjoy the actual act of sex with guys for the most part. And would never do anything with a minor.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Right out of gate it isn’t pedophilia if you’re scared of being attracted to teenagers. Pedos are attracted to pre-pubescent children. That’s the one and only definition.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
right, my pocd has kinda morphed into what i guess i would call ephebophelia ocd. makes it hard to even enjoy fiction as i’ve outaged most of my favorite fictional characters (especially in anime) and most underage characters in video games or cartoons can vaguely fit an age of ranges and are often portrayed as more mature than real teenagers.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Brain1 This is the exact same as me wow. It’s so hard to read or watch anything without feeling guilty about experiencing a single emotion lol
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@snva i totally feel that! and i can’t even like a character or have any positive emotion towards them without my ocd telling me it’s sexual attraction
- Date posted
- 3y ago
this is helpful, i’ve been on this ocd rodeo to know long enough reassurance isn’t helpful in the long run. Thank you for responding! :)
- Date posted
- 3y ago
No worries u can do this!!!!! Hang in there x
Related posts
- Date posted
- 16w ago
I’m really struggling with something related to me ocd, and I would appreciate kind and supportive advice. If you can’t relate or don’t think anything you have to say would be helpful, I kindly ask pls refrain from commenting this is a really sensitive topic for me. Recently, I’ve noticed a pattern that feels something extremely new and distressing. The first time it happened I remember telling myself before self pleasuring that I am in control no matter what thought comes into my mind because I wanted to prove to myself that these thoughts are just from OCD and I know who I am and an intrusive that came out of no where, and i suddenly felt an intense fear that I was acting on it. In the moment I genuinely felt like I did. And afterword, I panicked and started questioning myself. This SAME FEELING has happened three times in a row each time, the intrusive thought was unwanted and random, and completely against my morals most recently it involved pocd and it feels even worse because it generally felt like I acted on it the thought in the moment while I was self pleasuring the panic doesn’t hit until afterwards when I stop :/ I start thinking that maybe I generally made a mistake and I’m now just realizing that it’s wrong because it generally feels like that :( but when I actually think about it again goes against my morals and values doesn’t make sense it feels incredibly real, and I can’t seem to shake this feeling off that I may have acted on it I’m terrified because I never wanted these thoughts in the first place. And I definitely didn’t choose them. If I had known, I would’ve had these intrusive thoughts I wouldn’t have self pleasured in the first place but it’s extremely hard to convince myself that this may be OCD because I feel like I have no other reason to believe that I didn’t act on it :/
- Date posted
- 10w ago
Being exposed to taboo p*rn as young as first grade ruined my life and now ocd is making me pay for it. I have so much guilt for being a child/teen and looking at taboo stuff, and it was all fictional or anime or whatever but it was still so so gross. and I didn't realize It because I had been used to it at so young 🫠 I think what haunts me most is when I was a kid/young teen (like 12-14ish) and didn't have access to p*rn I'd imagine stuff similar to what I'd seen in the art. I can't even believe I'd imagine scenarios involving kid characters or whatever because it had been so normalized to me and I assumed it was normal since it was fiction. I'm 23 now so it's been a decade since I've done anything like that and I've never had the urge to since but still. I've NEVER been attracted to kids or had any urges or anything ever, even when I was addicted. The thought makes me want to vomit, I'd rather die than associate anything sexual with kids/minors and I think people who groom or assault kids are vile. But I still feel like the fact that I imagined stuff similar to the things I read sometimes when I was young is proof I'm a p*do. I don't think people would believe me if I said I'm not. I just feel like I don't deserve to live or that if I do, I'm living a lie. I know 'I was a kid too' but even when I was 13/14 I read/imagined stuff with characters younger than me because I thought it was normal. I'm so disgusted. I've had this theme for so long I'm starting to wonder if ocd is right. I feel too ashamed to tell my therapist.
- Date posted
- 9w ago
(20f) I have been dealing with severe OCD symptoms for as long as I can remember. I recently got diagnosed about a year ago, and even though I know that these thoughts are probably my ocd, I still cant shake them. Growing up I was always very sexually curious. I was sheltered from a lot of things, as I went to a private school and things like sexuality and sex were never talked about. I remember doing some weird sexual things growing up (never affecting another person), looking up taboo sexual things, etc. I always seemed to become aroused no matter what the situation was, even if I just saw someone getting changed. I have no recollection of being SA'd, so i'm wondering where this all came from? Was I just curious and wanted to experiment and try different things? Or am I really a pervert, pedophile, etc. I have all these thoughts racing through my head and it's killing me. Everything I did as a kid I look back on and am disgusted, as those don't align with my views at all today. I never thought growing up thinking these things were wrong, or actually realize what they were until I got older. I'd like to think it was just my curiosity, but i'm not sure. What if i'm in denial and actually do like these things? I just need to know if theres something wrong w me, I cant keep going on like this. Could really use some advice.
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