Anonymous
- Date posted
- 3y
Sparker1289Sparker1289
- Date posted
- 3y
I experimented with another boy when I was about 8-10 but then didn't want to do it anymore and made it through my teens, and 20s without it bothering me.
Brave through Brave through
- Date posted
- 3y
Same but now because of ocd it feels like i wanted to do but then cause i was scared I didn’t and all this while i have been lying to myself cause I enjoyed myself back then or whatever ?!?!and I always put this whatever or question marks cause i am scared to believe what if i did enjoy then what ?!? Is ocd trying to convince me of something!? Does all this meam something i was too little to even remember anything?!?
Sparker1289Sparker1289
- Date posted
- 3y
@Brave through I went throughout my whole life being semi-proud of it. Because it made me who I was and I was comfortable with who I was because I never had any thoughts about being attracted to men. Just a friendship bond. But then when I couldn't achieve an erection with my lovely girlfriend, it sent me down a spiral
Brave through Brave through
- Date posted
- 3y
@Sparker1289 I have a question if yoy don’t mind answering could use some advice .. i was watching a video right now of this girl who quite pretty and has a bf but like out of all of the girls I would notice her more and I don't even think this sounds okay coming from a straight woman but its like i notice her and then have thoughts like oh she's pretty why does she have a bf?!? Like why would i get that thought and also like out all of the videos i saw hers only and then thought she is like pretty to date and like that felt too real and normal like I would say about a guy and like had thoughts like oh can't date her she has a bf and these thoughts we're not feeling intrusive like what does that mean? And if i am getting these thoughts i should panic and close the video as a compulsion if its ocd but I didn't and continued to watch it and i feel like writing this post too is just a forced compulsion cause i scared or whatever and why do i sometimes start agreeing to ocd or defending my denial and not ocd like I believe its denial more than ocd when i should be screaming and saying no its ocd and not denial and the thoughts that i had just felt so natural like I don't know if they are real or not?!? Like where am i supposed to go from here and what can i do?!? And thoughts like dating her just seem non ocd cause ocd is as i have heard not imagining or fanaticising emotional things and this did feel something dk what but something and soocd is usually sexual intrusive thoughts w/o emotions so what were mine is this even ocd?!?
Sparker1289Sparker1289
- Date posted
- 3y
@Brave through I honestly don't know... I am nowhere close to a professional in what any of this means. I am currently dealing with my own SOOCD/Denial dilemma. I personally don't mind finding people on YouTube or internet attractive. "Oh, he's attractive." It's when it happens to me in real life that it bothers me. I hate the fact that I tend to notice men more now than I notice women. My attraction towards women feels forced where as my possible attraction towards a male seems natural. It's really difficult to make sense of
Brave through Brave through
- Date posted
- 3y
@Sparker1289 Same i am exhausted and tired too of feeling the similar way and idk what to do usually I don’t notice the same sex at all when i am out but if sometimes i do as I notice the opposite sex my brain tells me and my confused heart and emotions too that you noticed her the same way you did him and there’s no difference lime whats the difference line that mean you’re bi and just in denial cause it’s difficult to tell as you noticed them the similar way… like what and where is the difference and this feels so real to deny like i don’t know then what to even do…
PinkLotusPinkLotus
- Date posted
- 3y
Mines pretty bad, my sophomore year I got dared to kiss my girl friends (just a peck) and I did it a few times. I’m 90% i just did it for the attention and because I liked making myself seem “cooler” than I actually was. It doesn’t even trigger me that much honestly because I felt nothing doing it but it still comes back to haunt me from time to time with this theme
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 3y
Did you also do anything as a child, like (this is so embarrassing) but hump a pillow or stuffed animal and kinda feel like a girl? It botheres me all the time and I'm scared I'm in denial or something
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Anonymous
- Date posted
- 17w
Having a erection while simultaneously having bad memories of past actions
Hey guys I'm 17 years old I had experience with OCD I looked trans pornography and femboy stuff I'm straight I didn't jerk off to it I was really only looking at it in the past I have but for some reason I just felt like looking at it and when I did I did experience arousal not only that while I had a boner I simultaneously was thinking of memories and bad actions I had in 4th grade with another boy I myself not a homosexual I was a kid I did something with another boy I regret it I had that thought in my head lingering there in my head but I noticed pre ejaculation and now I feel anxiety because now it feels like I was intrigued by the thought it feels like it is it was probably to the video visual stimulus but it's hard I didn't jerk off to it at all I was really just looking idk what to do it feels like I did experience it to the video but also my thoughts say to the thought idk what to do can someone shed light on this
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johnsarry
- Date posted
- 14w
had very bad hocd need help
i'm positive i was attracted to women before this got a thought when i was high thought really really deeply into and changed my life now im 24/7 scared im gay ive always been attracted to girls but early in my sexual life where im at ive always got with girls and seemed a little disapointed after would love help and to hear past experiences
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- Date posted
- 12w
I’m scared I might be more sexually attracted to women and more romantically to men
Hi everyone, I’ve been really anxious lately, and I just need to get this out of my head. Someone recently told me that maybe I’m bisexual — that I might be more sexually attracted to women, but more romantically attracted to men. That bisexuality is not 50/50. And ever since I heard that, I’ve been spiraling. The thing is: I don’t want this to be true. It scares me. I don’t feel romantic attraction to women, I’ve never wanted to be in a relationship with one. But yes, I get aroused by fantasies involving women — and that makes me feel broken or like I’ve been lying to myself. I love my boyfriend deeply, I don’t want to lose him. I want to feel fully connected to him, physically and emotionally. But now I’m stuck in this obsessive loop of questioning: “What if I’m just in denial?” “What if I’m not really straight?” “What if this is why my libido is low?” It’s exhausting, and I don’t know if this is OCD, anxiety, or if something is fundamentally wrong. Has anyone else felt this split — romantic feelings for one gender, sexual feelings for another? I feel so alone and scared. Thanks for listening.
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