I feel mentally numb. š
ā ļø TW ā ļø
I keep trying to get my post count down but every time I get it back into the single digits something happens.
I have had the horrible habit of taking Flexeril or Tylenol p.m. extra strength to help me go to sleep. Iāve been doing that basically almost nonstop for like a month. And the pills do add to things if you know what I mean. They both have the potential of giving you weird dreams. Flexeril can cause abnormal thinking and dreaming by itself itās not like I donāt have abnormal thinking anyway but it adds to it.
My mom walked out and Iām scared ā cause sheās looking for sports bra and Iām friend I donāt like her big round boobs! And then I started to say what makes you think I donāt I do I donāt like boobs thatās what makes me think that! I donāt wanna emphasize I do cause I was saying that Iām the one that thinks that I donāt like boobs you know I was trying to positively say that I donāt wow that doesnāt make sense.
Iām scared I am Iām not starting to like the way boobs look or are structured. I donāt want to like the roundness and there was some neighbor guy walking behind me I made a face because he doesnāt have it and Iām scared they are and Iām smiling weird but theyāre not delicious I donāt like the rounds of boobs on boys and balls and I make a face like I donāt but I want that. I just literally made an expression like I could smell something bad and shook my head in the negative thing I donāt and Iām doing it now shaking my head no I do want boys and balls I donāt want boobs.
Iām was kind of just making excuses. Iām scared of the way Iām reacting over guys chest muscles I literally act like something is wrong with
a guy because he doesnāt and I donāt want him to have round boobs I donāt want him to have boobs. Iām scared I do I donāt want to start this! I donāt want the round is a welcome to go back to being disgusting mean itās not like they actually make me happy but I want I said I crave it thatās probably not true I wanted to go back to just being straight up disgusting and up for me to treat guys like thereās something wrong with them because I donāt have round this and I literally acted like they were closed because I donāt have it and I try to copy paste boots but I donāt want heavy roundness or sagging or unnatural perking us or anything.
Iām scared I keep shaking my head in the negative but I want balls I want boys
I hate acting like I itās like itās just so sensory you know like so details so realistic like I do but I donāt want the roundness of boobs and Iām scared I am and I frightened that I keep thinking mean things like go now that heās gotten in shape and I keep shaking my head and the negative but Iāve always wanted my guy we even when he was super skinny and I donāt understand why Iām shaking my head the negative. I do want him no matter what his shape is Iām not gonna act like heās not in great shape now!
This whole roundness of boobs things really getting on my nerves I donāt want boobs but I donāt like how Iām treating him and I donāt wanna be over my guy and I donāt wanna act like thereās something wrong with the guy because I do I donāt want the strained heavily overly rounded sides of foods and I donāt want any other shape size are consistency they come in
