- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I'm sorry you're going through this. It's really hard when your partner is not fully understanding the issue, especially with rocd. I showed the channel "Awaken into love" on youtube to my boyfriend and it really helped him. There's a video on how partners can help and understand rocd better. Maybe you can try by showing him this?
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes it would be a good idea but we are Greeks and he doesn't know the English language so i will have to translate everything which may be difficult...it feels so lonely to go through this and not being understood...i dont know what he understands...that I may want to be like this or i can change by myself??? He is totally unable to help me if he doesn't try to accept the full thing i go through...
- Date posted
- 3y
@zoed Ah very sorry about the language barrier... That must be even harder! I wish I could do more, but best would be that he learns in depth about ocd and especially rocd. That's really the only thing that would help.
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes i have to find articles or videos in Greek! Thank you for your help!
- Date posted
- 3y
Hey im greek! Lol. With relationship ocd
- Date posted
- 3y
I do try to understand and thank him almost every day for accepting my situation but there are times when he is. Not careful with his words and he would say hurtful things. I know he doesn't really want to hurt me and maybe its because of his tiredness and sadness. I don't like to make excuses but it is a reality that suffering from a mental illness makes you feel horrible with yourself first and guilty for doing compulsions and say unkind words to your significant others. All I am saying is people with mental illness experience symptoms that they do not desire and suffer as they are locked in an endless negative loop. On the other hand the partner does suffer from this situation but if they have a good mental health they can, in a way, control some of their reactions and behaviour towards the other person. All we need when we suffer from Ocd is understanding, compassion and support. We don't want to be excused but fully accepted as we already feel so bad for ourselves. I would like him to be more careful with his words and reactions just because he already knows and sees I didn't choose to be this person and act like that.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
I am at a very difficult spot in my relationship. My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years, and I have a history of cheating that for years we’ve been trying to work through. To me, it makes a lot of sense that my OCD has attached itself to this and for the last few years I’ve experienced intrusive sexual thoughts of others and relationship ocd. I have been open to him about the content of my thoughts and now, with a proper diagnosis of an anxiety disorder, I am able to reframe them and work through them with ERP so that my brain will *hopefully* get bored and stop sending them. But, things have not been easy. As a result of this and everything in our past, he has become anxious about all the scenarios where I could be having sexualized thoughts about other people. To him, if I am thinking something utterly different than what I am telling him or acting like to him, he can’t fully trust it. And of course, I can imagine how difficult it is to know your life partner is sexualizing others in her brain and to be able find a way to dismiss them as unthreatening, especially when past mistakes say otherwise. Is there anyone that has gone through this with a partner? And other than repeatedly explaining the egodystonic nature of my thoughts and providing reassurance, what are some things you did that helped them? Any advice helps! Thank you
- Date posted
- 19w
Lately my ROCD has been flaring up, making it difficult to even be around my partner. I’m having so many troubling thoughts with the one that bugs me most being, “maybe this isn’t my OCD, maybe I’m just in a bad relationship and I’m trying to cover it up and blame it on OCD”. This thought really scares me because there are valid doubts in my relationship but my boyfriend and I have openly talked about them and are trying to work through. My OCD won’t take that as an option tho. It makes me feel like I need to be 100% certain that these things can NEVER happen again or else we need to break up immediately. So anything he says in that moment about trying to do better, my OCD will not trust anything he says and just wait until the next “bad thing” happens. When I continuously bring these things up to my boyfriend even tho nothing has happened between these conversations, it exhausts him making it feel like he can never do enough. I feel so bad because I know it’s just my OCD getting in the way. But then that thought creeps in saying I can’t trust him because I need to protect myself. It’s just an ongoing cycle that is so tiring. I don’t even know what I want anymore. We are very opposite when it comes to emotions. I am very in tune and very emotionally intelligent, and he is not. He is the opposite. I do recognize that my anxious attachment style may be hard for him too but I can’t stop thinking about all of his flaws and all of the things he needs to do to make our relationship better. It makes me feel like I’m the only one putting in effort when in reality that is not true. But my OCD does make me feel like he doesn’t really love me or want to be with me and that he feels forced to be with me or do things for me. It makes me feel like him being with me is like a chore. Can anyone relate? My OCD just makes me feel like I can’t trust anything he says to make our relationship better.
- Date posted
- 13w
[ vent ] At times, I'll be doing fine, and I won't be thinking about anything, and then boom. I have thoughts like, you don't love your partner, you only say I love you to convince yourself you love him, you don't actually like him. It makes me really upset because I genuinely do like my partner, I genuinely do want to be with my partner, I wouldn't do anything to hurt him, and I love him so much. But I always tend to talk to AI, and AI is always telling me my symptoms are just ROCD. And I just want to get rid of it because I didn't have these problems before, and now I do, and I just want them to go away. Yesterday, I was literally crying because of how bad I felt. My partner does me amazing, he treats me amazing, but my thoughts always lead me to wonder, what if this isn't ROCD and I just genuinely don't like my partner? Even though, as much as I want to, what if I don't, but I really do, and I want to be with him, and I do love him. Recently, I've talked to him about these feelings, and he told me that he's felt like this before as well, but the way he comes with it, he doesn't think about it as much. But me, it goes in my head over and over and over and over and over and over, it's like a loop or a cycle that never ends. And I always look up, how can I heal from ROCD, and it just says to settle with the thoughts, don't look for reassurance, and it's hard not to do that because like, what else am I supposed to do? It's hard for me not to do that because it's so heavy, and to me, for my ROCD, it never shows up as what if questions, it always shows up as statements like, you don't, you don't love him, you don't want to be with him, you're only saying that you love him to convince yourself you do, stuff like that. It's hard
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