I’m so mad because I got my post count down pretty low and now I’m spiking again I said might be I’m not I don’t think I might be at all I said just because I don’t I do find my guy attractive but I am worried because of the really bad thought I had last night I’m looking at him now like I don’t want I’ve always found him attractive whether he had like facial hair or not and I’m acting like he’s not and I don’t I said I don’t want to I don’t want to find him attractive I do find him attractive I don’t want to not all of a sudden find him attractive. Because I was really feeling it for him over one old picture that’s like technically more recent but still kind of old as opposed to something from years ago and I’m scared that I am and I make a face like he is he is not ugly I don’t he’s fucking gorgeous I don’t wanna ever not find him attractive I don’t wanna lose a friend and I don’t I’m scared I’m treating him like he’s weird because he’s but I’m not gay he’s not weird because he’s a guy he is gorgeous I don’t wanna look at his face and act like not when he is attractive to me. I don’t wanna lose it for him I’m scared I have and I’m acting weird and happy like I’m smiling I smile awkwardly and then I take step back in my mind like mentally like I don’t but I do find them attractive I’m scared I don’t want to change your switch teams I don’t want another guy despite Not being with him I don’t want to I don’t want this. I’m literally making a face and stepping back like he’s not but he’s fucking gorgeous and an awesome weird dorky guy and I’m scared I don’t really and I know I don’t have to but I do love the guy I do love what I know about his personality I was gonna say I wish I could be with him but that doesn’t look to be in the cards it’s not that it’s not in the car it’s just hard to tell So it’s not necessarily impossible for to be in the cards so to speak just really hard to be at the same time if that makes sense but I don’t like looking at him like he’s not he’s fucking gorgeous I don’t wanna female knock

I’m like 90% sure I’m just bi, more romantically inclined to men, mainly my bf who I wanna marry. But now my brain is like “if you lean into liking women or keep circling and circling for answers you’ll lose all attraction to men and your bf. You’re practically already a lesbian” I feel so tense and anxious I will admit I am talking to chat gpt out of desperation I’m scared of losing all attraction to him I don’t wanna be thinking about women. I don’t unless I’m really stressed cuz when I’m stressed my ocd can take advantage of that I can usually ground myself when I’m in the city with him but I’m back home for most of the summer and I can’t be physically close to him which usually reminds me that hey this is real this is what I really want in life. Him But then I panic and question I haven’t been here in a while tbh. I’m worried I don’t feel enough. I don’t like magic Mike all that much, I like softer guys. But now the fact I don’t like/get turned on by random men on tv but do women in lingerie really stresses me out and makes me worry I’m truly a lesbian but I’m not. Once I started getting to know my bf and my ex bf’s I really did truly genuinely like them and wanted to make out and everything. Idk can anyone relate to the not liking big buff men All my brain is repeating rn is “when he dies you’ll be able to date a woman, when you break up you’ll only wanna date women” and it’s stressing me out. It’s making me nauseous. I was doing well for about a couple days after I initially left but being at home has been so incredibly draining This might give you a vision of how stressful home is: I’ve been on nexplanon for 7 months ish? Only had very minimal spotting during a stressful school period. Today: fully bleeding, like a usual period. I haven’t had my period since having it put in. I wanna go back to my bf so badly rn. I’m so worried I’m faking or don’t feel enough. I’m learning what a healthy relationship looks like and I’m terrified I’m gonna up and leave him when we’re older cuz I’ll finally figure out that I’m a lesbian or smthn. Idk. Someone pls just help me out a tad

Hey guys so I have been suffering with sexual ocd due to the fact that I don’t feel that romantic spark with him anymore, I love him and I know I do but I get to much in my thoughts thinking about why can’t I feel that anymore what has changed what if I don’t wanna be with anymore I’ve been with him for 4 years and at first I think it was ROCD but now I started thinking what if I’m into girls now I’ve always been the type to say oh a girl is so pretty or I like this about her but now I feel like every time I see a girl I’m like do I see myself in a relationship with her oh she’s pretty oh I like her voice do I find it attractive and sometimes I do !!! Which is killing me I feel disgust thinking about because what if I secretly am no shame to people who are my sister herself is but I just feel wierd because I wanna be with my husband and feel happy there not with a girl and feel like a man because I see myself in the mirrior and I’m like do I myself being a man do I look lesbian? Do I act lesbian or bi? What if secretly I wanna be a man or I imagine myself being a man in a relationship with a pretty girl and idk what to think

seriously someone pls give me advice 😭 I think last week I posted about how I have a crush on my friend and how my brain was making me question everything (mostly my sexuality). Well now I know he has a crush on me too and I’m already worrying about not liking him anymore, even though I was thinking about him all day before he confessed to me. I went to look at pictures to make sure I still think he’s attractive and I didn’t feel the same. Now I’m worrying about if I’ll no longer feel attracted to him when we hangout in person. Why can’t I at least have a simple crush? Why must I question everything??? WHY CANT MY BRAIN JUST FUNCTION NORMALLY THIS IS DRIVING ME INSANE!!?? If you have any tips on how to deal with this please let me know 😭.