I wanted to give some advice to my rOCD friends. I also have rOCD, but I’m happy to say that nearly 2 years after my diagnosis I’m doing much better and am in a loving relationship. I see a lot of you worrying about whether or not you’re with the right partner. Worrying about if you actually love them or find them attractive. And of course, worrying that you don’t actually have rOCD. It sucks, I know. I used to worry about the same things too (and still do, just far less). I’m not here to tell you that you’re partner is right for you, because idk if that’s true. You could very well be with someone who’s not good for you. Or you could be with someone who is good for you. That’s beside the point. The point is that regardless of whether your partner is right for you or not, a person without rOCD doesn’t worry like we do. The anxiety, ruminating, and constant questioning and reassurance-seeking we do is not typical for most people. Why am I saying this? Because I want you to try ERP. A lot of you seem very hesitant to give ERP an honest try for more than a few days because there’s this fear that you’re lying to yourself. I understand, I used to feel like that too. But regardless of whether or not you’re lying to yourself or not, the amount of suffering and anxiety you experience is not warranted even if you are with the wrong person. The only way to recover from this anxiety is to expose yourself to it and face it head-on. Maybe you do ERP for a few weeks and you come out the other side realizing you don’t live your partner. So be it. Maybe you come out realizing you still love your partner. Both scenarios can happen. The point of ERP is to help you accept your negative intrusive thoughts, not to save your relationship. Whether or not you should stay with your partner, I can’t say. What I can say is that you can’t properly make that judgment when you’re plagued with all these intrusive thoughts and anxiety. So treat that first. Only when you learn to accept your intrusive thoughts and not let them bother you can you really make some sort of judgment. Even then things will never be certain. But that’s ok. You guys got this 💪🏼

lexi1347

Date posted: 3y

Too afraid to get help because I’m too afraid to come out and realize I don’t love my boyfriend anymore and it’s horrible and it’s not “okay so be it “ for me because that’s my best fucking friend , that’s my support , my comfort , my heart, my waking up in the middle of the night to see him still there .

ragv

Date posted: 3y

Can we practice ERP and thought stopping together in SO OCD

JLG323

Date posted: 3y

I couldn't have said this better. I have had rocd for almost 4 years now through two different relationships and I recently started ERP's. I can truly say that I'm starting to actually feel and objectively see that I am starting to make a hell of a turn around. I've had a million good patches through this hell and I can tell clear as day that this is not a good patch, this is not relief from reassurance, this is change. Self induced change. I'm proud of you.

Drvmstick

Date posted: 3y

Yeah it’s a hard oth but it’s worth it. Thanks for the kind words friend 👍🏼

lexi1347

Date posted: 3y

But before I even had rocd I loved him sm so idk it gives me hope

Drvmstick

Date posted: 3y

Yeah. It’s hard but you truly have to face your fears to get passed it. But I can tell you from experience that ERP totally works. But you can’t hold back. Def get help if you’ve an though

lexi1347

Date posted: 3y

@Drvmstick But I loved him even before rocd so idk it’s just all so confusing but I’m finding therapy now He’s supporting me he’s afraid that I’ll leave him but he also has hope all I can think is negative

Drvmstick

Date posted: 3y

@lexi1347 Yeah, that all sounds like rOCD. I’m glad you’re getting help. I know it’s all confusing and there’s nothing I can say to make you feel better. But it worked for me and I’m still happily with my gf so I hope the same can be done for you ❤️

Drvmstick

Date posted: 3y

Path*

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond