Hope everyone is having a beautiful Wednesday! Looking for some advice/encouragement about facing the top tiers of an ERP hierarchy… specifically for HOCD. In my appointment today with my therapist she suggested that it was time to tackle the more difficult triggers on my hierarchy (on the positive side, I think this is progress?)We started to talk about a safety plan and the potential of tackling the more bothersome issues. Of course this spiked my anxiety. However, I’m not completely sure what I would consider as my higher ranked triggers. In past conversations in developing my hierarchy she discussed the potential of going to a gay bar or asking a neighbor of mine about when she left her husband to be with a woman (which really happened and was my initial triggering event that started my HOCD). The thing is I don’t think these type of things are relatable to my underlying HOCD fear. Thinking about going to a gay bar does not spike me with anxiety as I am not nervous around gay people. For me, it’s more the fact that straight people do leave their marriages, even happy marriages with children, to be with someone of the same sex. I am not afraid about going to a gay bar or to have a conversation with my neighbor, I’m more fearful of what could be implied—what if someone saw me (plus with Covid surging, I’m not going anywhere!). What would my neighbor think if we had that conversation? I guess my question is: how have you dealt with moving up the hierarchy? People with HOCD, what are some exercises/ideas you could recommend that were 8, 9, or 10s on your list? Obviously I don’t want my therapist to think I’m avoiding certain things—I’ve been more than open and willing bc with my ERP. I just don’t think those types of suggestions would be beneficial for my HOCD/Pure O. Thanks! ❤️

I have been really battling with my SO OCD, and I’ve recently started to have a ton of wins!!! I’m really excited about it, but as I’ve noticed myself not engaging as much… different things have popped up. Now im obsessed with people’s perception on me, and them looking at me and thinking by how I walk, how I talk, what I wear, how I move… that I am gay? And am so convinced everyone thinks that and “knows something that I don’t”. Is that typical with OCD? If so, any ERP advice on how to overcome these thoughts?

Hey everyone, just wanted to post an honest update on where I’m at in my HOCD recovery. Right now, I'm stuck in what feels like a 24/7 spike — nonstop thoughts, intrusive sensations, identity doubts, and hyperfocus. The worst part? It feels real. Like I’ve “lost,” like I’ve accepted it, like I am gay. The thoughts don't feel like anxiety anymore — they feel like truth. I’ve been trying to do ERP, but the spike has been so constant I don’t even have to “do exposures” — the thoughts, feelings, and sensations are just there all day long. It’s like living inside an exposure. And it’s exhausting. BUT — here’s what I’ve been doing (and what I’m sticking to now): I say once: “These thoughts and feelings are welcome to stay for as long as they want.” I let the doubt, the feelings, the hyperfocus exist. I don’t check, test, or analyze — even when it screams at me. I live my life anyway — folding clothes, watching TV, eating, walking — with the storm in my head. Even when it feels 100% real. Even when I’m fully focused on it. I’ve stopped trying to feel better. I’m letting it all burn — and just not fixing it. It doesn’t feel good. It doesn’t feel right. It doesn’t feel like progress.

One problem - Various themes This is my first post. I had a relapse a few months ago. Life was amazing and then boom, I got triggered by something and started spiralling about my sexuality (having finally been at peace for two years, entered a healthy new relationship and come out of the closet as an older women). How do you, when you're not triggered practice ERP? I'm able to try and accept the thoughts every time I see a man. What should I be doing when I don't encounter these triggers. I was to say as well that I also am starting to get real event OCD about some of the sexual things I did in the past when I was married and in an unhealthy toxic relationship with my ex husband. I am shamed and disgusted and I'm working on it but there's a certain subsection of the LGBTQ community that trigger these thoughts, groinals and thing for me... I feel like I'm beginning to realise I need to maybe be a little more active in my recovery instead of waiting for triggers... But I don't know how