I was talking to this girl and she was talking about how she took some guys virginity and I got a groinal and it’s giving me intrusive thoughts about how I’m aroused by the fact she was talking about a guy... 😞😞😞

Hey guys I'm 17 years old I had experience with OCD I looked trans pornography and femboy stuff I'm straight I didn't jerk off to it I was really only looking at it in the past I have but for some reason I just felt like looking at it and when I did I did experience arousal not only that while I had a boner I simultaneously was thinking of memories and bad actions I had in 4th grade with another boy I myself not a homosexual I was a kid I did something with another boy I regret it I had that thought in my head lingering there in my head but I noticed pre ejaculation and now I feel anxiety because now it feels like I was intrigued by the thought it feels like it is it was probably to the video visual stimulus but it's hard I didn't jerk off to it at all I was really just looking idk what to do it feels like I did experience it to the video but also my thoughts say to the thought idk what to do can someone shed light on this

Everyone talks about the physical sensations that come with reacting to sexual content, even if it’s something you do not agree with (like bestiality, pedophilia, or incest). But what about the mental feeling, like when it feels like you liked the thought? I think I might have asked this before, but does anyone else relate? It stresses me out that I have a mental reaction to something of sexual content more than groinals. Anyone else?

I remember another thing from the past where it was a sexual thought and I don’t remember if I was talking to or dating my gf at the time but it was like “if I was talking to someone else like _____ I’d be able to have sex already” and I feel terrible bc I don’t want sex. I would rather be with my girlfriend than any other girl. Idk if the thought was intrusive or not. I think the people or person I was thinking of may have been intrusive. I’m just terrified bc I really love my gf and don’t care about sex