Peter !
- Date posted
- 3y
Recoverer Recoverer
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
I’ve bounced back and forth between thoughts of harming others and harming myself when I’ve been alone the last few weeks. It’s incredibly dehibilitating and I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. I believe getting the anxiety under control is a good step but it’s also hard because to an extent you can’t really control it. Because as a result, it’s not the thoughts that cripple us but the anxiety that comes with it. But anyways, talk to a friend, get out of your home, go for a walk, exercise, play a video game, those are my first recommendations. Medically, I’d say an antidepressant combined with therapy will help lower the anxiety, but some people can find relief in doing just one or the other. However, with antidepressants, they can make you feel worse at the start before you get better as your body is adjusting to the medicine. And it can be a game of cat and mouse trying to find a medication that works for you because there’s so many meds out there and our bodies can have reactions or side effects to any of them. Lastly, for the thoughts, as much as they suck and as terrifying as they are, the more you try to run away from them and tell yourself “they’re not me, I don’t want to do anything bad” the more the thoughts will keep coming in and attacking you worse. And with harm, trust me, accepting these thoughts is extremely tough, I just was dealing with this and I still am to an extent, but it’s less about actually “agreeing” with the thoughts that you’ll do them and more about just acknowledging their presence in your hand and then remembering and saying, “hey, I can’t control the future, but I’m just gonna keep it moving anyways. Maybe something terrible would or could happen, but I’m not there and I can’t predict it” and also get yourself into an activity or routine everyday. The more you shift your focus to other things, the less time you’ll spend ruminating. In doing this, you may even hit a point saying, “well I haven’t been thinking the thoughts as much lately, so does this mean I want to do them now?” And in essence, that’s just your mind telling you to keep focusing on the fear when you know deep down it’s not a threat because thought doesn’t automatically equal action. If you hit this point, you’re already improving because you’ve already been taking less time obsessing over the intrusive thoughts and ruminating. You’ll get there, it’s hard for me to say those words to myself even but we will.
Recoverer Recoverer
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
*in your head
Related posts
Stacey353
- Date posted
- 24w
Can’t stop the what if thoughts
What if this and what if that. It’s all harm related and the urges feel so real I just can’t stand this anymore. Does anyone have any advice that has conquered OCD harm intrusive thoughts. I have them 24/7 and they are so scary.
Andi 🤓☝️
- Date posted
- 23w
Anxious
I'm at my college and don't feel like being here. I didn't even want to come here. I woke up with anxiety bc i feel like i need to solve this. I had a bad stomach ache when i arrived to school and still havent even eaten breakfast yet bc i feel like i have to solve this. Im just so worried bc i have harm thoughts daily. If i could i would remove this! I dont want to think anymore. Its just, how do I know i dont have real urges when I'm feeling a negative emotion like anger or disappointment or annoyance? Im worried EVERY time i feel a negative emotion. Yesterday I was playing video games with my neice (we are close in age range) and she made us lose. She started blaming me and I guess i felt a little annoyed, it really wasnt my fault (dumb mini argument it was more playful since we started laughing but it was a bit annoying). Anyway i got a harm thought while feeling annoyed of me getting off the couch and lunging at her to attack. I immediately look at my bodily reaction and I tense up to stay as still as possible. My stomach was hurting and i wanted to leave as fast as possible. I stood up and turned off the game and said i was tired while making sure to stay back from her (and i had my hands away and stiff) but i felt so uneasy. I laid I bed and felt sad and heavy. And i kept getting thoughts that said "íts only a matter of time before you can't take it anymore". I started to reassurance seek using ai to ask if i was about to or if they are real urges or thoughts i mean until i eventually fell asleep in the middle of the compulsion. Im just so worried, what if I act out impulsevly one day? I dont want to! But what if when feeling a negative emotion, i suddenly dont care and do something? I really dont want to! I dont even want to feel negative emotions anymore since they trigger the thoughts and I dont want to think about any of that. As a result i tend to avoid my family as much as possible bc they are annoying sometimes. I just wish i was all alone sometimes so i wont get any more thoughts and so everyone can be safe. I usually just stay in bed under my blankets all day long to avoid my family and pets. I am constantly uncomfortable. I miss when i would never think any of this. Living life has become very scary for me now. 😞
Brian.Hope
- Date posted
- 23w
Harm ocd
Hey, I suffer from harm ocd and I feel as if it’s non stop everything I do everyday I believe I killed someone I believe it’s harm ocd and false memory but like today I went to the store and saw a older lady and my head thinks of images of me pushing them or killing then and right after that thought I feel as if I done it then the rest of the day I ruminate replaying everything. I know erp and I should just accept the thought and let it go but it’s not easy and I feel as if i really hurt or killed someone and I don’t want to go to jail for something I don’t want to do . Any tips would be appreciated I don’t know how to accept and move on when it feels so real that I did something!
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