I first got ocd when I was 14 15 years old I had alot of rituals and alot were visible I had alot of repetitive things I’d do so my family noticed something was rong wit me I was also takeing showers for 2 hours so I was taken up the bathroom I was doing rituals and doing them just rite I didn’t think I was dirty I just felt like I had to wash my body a certain way and I also counted it was just hard and my mom also washed my hair and my face when she could to help me not take so long getting ready so I could go to school none of us really new bout ocd and my mom took me to our family doctor and I guess he told my mom bout it and wat to do to help me I finally went to a mental hospital for a week they told us first time patients usually only stay a week which now that doesn’t make sense then I had to go again and staid for 2 months it was very scary for me cause the showering for 2 hours wasn’t allowed in the hospital cause the workers had to get all the kids in the showers I shouldve obviously been an acception considering I had no control over my shower time it could’ve been worked on and shortened but I couldn’t just take a normal shower cause I was being threatened I told the workers hysterically crying out of fear that I couldn’t do it that I had ocd they didn’t really care they were only there to babysit us so there job and go home no actually therapy and work occurred at this hospital so I sat for 2 weeks in the hallway wit the bad kids I ate breakfast lunch and dinner on the cold tile floor and wasn’t allowed to do anything I wasn’t allowed to tlk to anyone so for 2 weeks I’d just sit there nothing to do except sit I was being punished for my ocd so as a child I thought there was something rong wit me that was so horrible it needed to be punished I was already embarrassed and confused being young wit ocd now I was definitely embarrassed and scared to tlk bout my ocd cause even this mental hospital couldn’t help me so I isolated at the hospital and didn’t tlk to the staff I didn’t open up at weekly doctor visits cause I felt so disrespected and invalidated I wasn’t bout to share details of my ocd obviously they couldn’t help me noone there was qualified to assist me in my ocd I told them I had ocd I had rituals I did they wanted spacific details like exactly wat I did which was pointless to tell everyone there this information I have ocd and do rituals help me that’s it but noone liked that but I new the way I was being treated wasn’t rite I new that I was shareing enough information to get help and they just weren’t qualified but they gave me medication which helped I did somewat get better but also I didn’t have alot of different ocd subtypes at this time and I hadn’t ritualized some things yet but if they would’ve told me they couldn’t help and transferred me somewere for ocd then then maybe I wouldn’t be this way now when I developed different ocd and started doing more rituals here and there they kind of slowly crept up on me I could’ve had the tools to fite those urges instead of graduallay getting worse over the years I trusted the doctors and hospitals and therapists I saw for my ocd and thought I was doing wat I needed to get better but never really was getting better and was to scared to tell them this wasn’t working I’ve been on all kinds of medication and seen different doctors over the years and they were all the same cause they didn’t understand ocd they didn’t even no the way to treat it they didn’t have any respect towards me and just blew me off basically but now I’ve learned a little bit more that ocd is very hard to treat and requires it’s own therapy but now no ocd place accepts my Medicaid and it can only be used in my state and there’s no facility’s in my state.