Some one please help me I feel like I am about to have a panic attack this hocd or soocd feels so real

Be careful though, searching about ocd could turn unintentionally into a compulsion.

I feel you, it's awful. Feeling like you're in denial is a really common ocd worry, even now that I'm recovering i get this doubt a lot. Be patient and it'll get much, much better. Never give up, NEVER. It's really important to not pity and let yourself give in and drown. It's hard but very, very possible to beat. Many people managed to do it, you're just as capable.

Although i haven't been officially diagnosed, I've been told by my therapist that i have autistic treats so i get how you feel to a certain extent (although everyone is different).Even though your mind is prone to analysis it doesn't mean that you have to constantly be a slave to it. Take it as an extra challenge, not as an obstacle that makes beating the game impossible. Start by stoping when you can some of the mental compulsions, you don't have to all of them. It may seem almost impossible to see, now that you feel awful, but by stopping yourself from doing compulsions (something which will make you feel worse for a bit) you'll get a sudden sense of long lasting relief the next days. Try it. You don't have to do erp. At the start you'll not be able to completely stop yourself and you'll keep on doing them but that's a normal part of recovery. It's making a goal and trying little by little what matters.

@LydiaK Pls help me

@Brave through Sure! What's your problem?

@LydiaK I wrote it in the post above

@LydiaK Also i am so confused of getting starting therapy what if my doctor says I don’t have ocd then what what is all this then ?!? Is that a possibility?!? If it is then where do i go from there.. its so messed up i am exhausted sometimes i question is this even ocd?!? Am i even straight was i ever?!

@Brave through Ocd can even make you question your own name. Ruminating by constantly analyzing possibilities reinforces it. This utter panic and confusion you're currently feeling is very common when you you have ocd. The reason you exhaust your self is the fact that you entertain these thoughts. Let them be, without adding additional commentary and analyzing them. In other words, feel awful without trying to avoid that by trying to neutralize your thoughts and it'll get better. Good luck.