kyle g tucker
- Date posted
- 3y
mbutelermbuteler
- Date posted
- 3y
Same. Last night was awful. But today i'm better, and i'm reading a lot (not about being gay, as i had done before, but about hocd)
LydiaKLydiaK
- Date posted
- 3y
Be careful though, searching about ocd could turn unintentionally into a compulsion.
LydiaKLydiaK
- Date posted
- 3y
You're not alone, mine was like that a few days ago. I know it won't help much if i tell you it gets better, but it really does. I had reach my limit, i felt like killing myself but now I'm closer to recovery. It may be hard to do it when your brain feels like it gets fried, but do try meditation. It's the only thing that helped me, including not analyzing my thoughts.
kyle g tuckerkyle g tucker
- Date posted
- 3y
I feel like their is no end to this honestly it just feel like denial it every day all day my head is about to blow I have a girl friend and two kids this I just wish this night mare would end I just don’t know what to do or which way to turn
LydiaKLydiaK
- Date posted
- 3y
I feel you, it's awful. Feeling like you're in denial is a really common ocd worry, even now that I'm recovering i get this doubt a lot. Be patient and it'll get much, much better. Never give up, NEVER. It's really important to not pity and let yourself give in and drown. It's hard but very, very possible to beat. Many people managed to do it, you're just as capable.
kyle g tuckerkyle g tucker
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you man that is very uplifting I really appreciate that. You see I think what doesn’t help is that I have Aspergers too which makes it even worse
LydiaKLydiaK
- Date posted
- 3y
Although i haven't been officially diagnosed, I've been told by my therapist that i have autistic treats so i get how you feel to a certain extent (although everyone is different).Even though your mind is prone to analysis it doesn't mean that you have to constantly be a slave to it. Take it as an extra challenge, not as an obstacle that makes beating the game impossible. Start by stoping when you can some of the mental compulsions, you don't have to all of them. It may seem almost impossible to see, now that you feel awful, but by stopping yourself from doing compulsions (something which will make you feel worse for a bit) you'll get a sudden sense of long lasting relief the next days. Try it. You don't have to do erp. At the start you'll not be able to completely stop yourself and you'll keep on doing them but that's a normal part of recovery. It's making a goal and trying little by little what matters.
Brave through Brave through
- Date posted
- 3y
@LydiaK Pls help me
LydiaKLydiaK
- Date posted
- 3y
@Brave through Sure! What's your problem?
Brave through Brave through
- Date posted
- 3y
@LydiaK I wrote it in the post above
Brave through Brave through
- Date posted
- 3y
@LydiaK Also i am so confused of getting starting therapy what if my doctor says I don’t have ocd then what what is all this then ?!? Is that a possibility?!? If it is then where do i go from there.. its so messed up i am exhausted sometimes i question is this even ocd?!? Am i even straight was i ever?!
LydiaKLydiaK
- Date posted
- 3y
@Brave through Ocd can even make you question your own name. Ruminating by constantly analyzing possibilities reinforces it. This utter panic and confusion you're currently feeling is very common when you you have ocd. The reason you exhaust your self is the fact that you entertain these thoughts. Let them be, without adding additional commentary and analyzing them. In other words, feel awful without trying to avoid that by trying to neutralize your thoughts and it'll get better. Good luck.
Related posts
vaiiolyn
- Date posted
- 22w
feeling helpless
As a lesbian with SO-OCD, I feel so helpless. It's truly exhausting because no one I know understands what I'm going through. The first response is always, "You're just confused" or "You don't have to know yet." But that's not the issue, I do know. I just never see any lesbians with SO-OCD so I feel so invalidated. These thoughts flood my brain constantly, forcing me to analyze my reactions to every man I see. I feel trapped in an endless cycle of "testing" myself, trying to prove that I don't like them. But my brain fights back, telling me I do want to love a man, making it feel real even though don't want it. It's terrifying. At this point, it's hard to even hold onto my identity as a lesbian because I'm so overwhelmed. I don't know if this is what real attraction is supposed to feel like, and that fear eats away at me. The truth is, when I think about being with a man, all I feel is disgust and fear-but my brain twists that into doubt. I hate it. I'm at the point where I'm scared I'm going to have to accept something I don't want because I don't know if this will ever go away. I miss who I was before all this.
ocdsurviver
- Date posted
- 15w
I’m so tired. HOCD is the worst.
I don’t know what to do with this bs anymore. I’m crying again and again and again and again. I cannot describe how painful this is. I’ve recovered from every single OCD subtype expect this one. HOCD is so scary and it’s so incredibly scary how it feels so real. The issue with this subtype is how intertwined it is with feelings and sensations. I hate how it keeps latching onto the past and uses the past as proof. I don’t want it to be the truth. I don’t want to accept any possibility.
youllwintheb...
- Date posted
- 10w
hocd
I feel like I'm lying to myself, like I just don't accept that I'm gay, I don't want to be gay, I don't want to feel any kind of attraction anymore, I want to go to a psychologist to find out if I really have hocd or if it's just an excuse, because it feels like I really am gay, but nothing was authentic, it all started with thoughts that made me panic extremely hard and I felt like crying and I had delusions, I don't understand why this is happening to me, I didn't like any boys before the thoughts appeared, but exactly one day after they appeared, all the boys were attractive, of all ages, I want to recover :( I'm only 17 years old, for about 2 months I've been having thoughts, I don't know what to do, I can't go to a psychologist, I need help :(
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