- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I am so sorry you’re struggling with this. This sounds so familiar to me, I went through very much the same things. I was not brought up in a religious household. I went to church with a friend and learned about things I had never heard of since we did not practice any religion in my home and became very afraid and started having obsessions about it and then compulsions (not knowing then that it was OCD). I have become more religious as an adult and started reading the Bible, praying, watching church online. But it is hard because a lot of the things you are told in church seem at odds with what you should do to treat your OCD. I think it’s hard when the lines are not clear from where magical thinking OCD and true religious beliefs and practices ends. I just started therapy to address these issues. I’ve only had my informational sessions so I can’t tell you how it ends but I have hope that it helps me to have a better relationship with God that is not tainted by compulsions and OCD fears and is based on true faith.
- Date posted
- 3y
If you don’t mind me asking, has sexual stuff bothered you too? I don’t think it’s wrong from a moral stand point but, I know they think it’s bad
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m just confused yknow
- Date posted
- 3y
I did struggle a lot with that and my boyfriend and I ended up breaking up over it. I got away from being religious while we dated and we got back together and then got married so it doesn’t bother me now since it’s not considered a sin for me anymore but it did a lot then. It also didn’t bother me from a moral standpoint, but only from a Christianity standpoint. I would say you should work with a therapist and a clergy member of some sort to help you sort through this. I’ve read it works well if you incorporate both. I’m not an expert on either but definitely know what you’re going through and how hard it is. I hope and pray we both can find help for this! My biggest piece of advice would be to not wait to seek therapy. I have struggled so many years with this and wasted so much time. I am 35 now and was definitely struggling with it at your age. I did go on medication at that time and that helped tremendously but it’s not enough on its own.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 14w
This is gonna be a long one: So a little over a month and a half ago, my OCD started to spiral again. I’ve had ups and downs with it in the past, my main themes often changing. When I was younger it as afraid I’d run away, in middle school it was germs. But as I got older I started having intrusive thoughts of the meaning of life, suicide, and dying, with those fears being my common themes now I’ve gotten a lot better since it started back up, but lately have been panicking because I’ve had intrusive thoughts that my methods of trying to heal are wrong. I’m 21, and for the last 3 years have lacked ambition and haven’t pursued my dreams or things I want to do. I just sleep, work, eat junk food, and play games or watch YouTube on my time off. Things I still love, but after years of living this way, I’ve hit a breaking point and want to start doing more with my life and the people in it Yet, almost EVERY new thing I’ve been trying to do or start, I’ve been having thoughts that they’re wrong or won’t help. Here’s some examples: I’ve started trying to eat a bit healthier, and my brain is telling me it’s not gonna fix me and I’m just avoiding food I like (junk I know makes me tired and sad). Then the moment I indulge in even one unhealthy food item, it tells me I’m failing at taking better care of myself and that junk food just numbs the feelings Same with video games. I tell myself it’s okay to play them as long as it’s not to avoid anything or they don’t take up my life like they have been. The second I do I feel guilty, say it’s cheap dopamine and hindering me from being productive and that I’m numbing my feelings again Same story for everything. Trying to walk and go outside more. Head tells me I’m avoiding being home because it makes me anxious. Then when I stay home it tells me I’m wasting time I could be spending outside or with people I love I’ll wanna spend time with my family or friends because I’ve been a hermit for years and miss spending time with them. When I try to, head tells me I can’t because then I’m avoiding the issues I have and seeking reassurance, and that I need to learn to tolerate this alone. But then when I stay home too long, I get anxious and sad because it does make me happy being around them even if I’m not seeking reassurance, and they genuinely do help me feel better (for example I saw my grandparents last night and talked about my feelings and desire to actually go out and live life, and they helped me understand uncertainty is part of life and I should do things I want anyways and even helped come up with things I may like to try doing. Now my brain tells me it’s bad to get help or open up about my pain) I’ll have racing thoughts in my head and I’ll be arguing with myself over rather it’s better to face them head on, ignore them, or let them run their course. It feels like no matter what I do, I’m feeling guilty and shame for it. As if any attempt at feeling pleasure or doing something that makes me happy is “avoiding the problem”, like I HAVE to focus on my intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and sadness 24/7 otherwise I’m “avoiding/burying it again” I know not to avoid these things and it’s best to confront them (if they’re real problems I have like relationship issues and insecurities and loneliness) and learn to tolerate the anxiety and uncertainty of life and OCD, but my attempts at “helping myself” are quite literally what I feel is currently keeping me so miserable. They’re sucking whatever joy I have in life out, telling me it’s bad, and that I have to feel this way all the time so I can “learn to tolerate it” I’m just so scared of doing all of this wrong, and I think my OCD I knows that and is currently using that to toy with me. I want to be healthier and happier, but then I feel guilt and fear for not being healthy 24/7 and indulging in not healthy things like video games and the occasional junk food. Anybody else ever felt this way?
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 7d
My religious OCD is having a field day with Christianity. I grew up Catholic, although we were the type of family who only really went to church on holidays. It was just a knowing of our belief in Jesus, and trying to live morally good lives. Knowing that Jesus died for our sins. Then my OCD latched onto the idea of “willful sinning”, knowing something is a sin but doing it anyway. I am not a saint. I swear, I engage in sexual activity, I tell white lies occasionally, drink alcohol occasionally…. Much less than the typical person. I know these things are sins according to the bible. I feel like I do decently well and am a decently good person. But my OCD has decided that because I don’t 100% align with the teachings of the bible, I must be going to Hell. The worst part is I don’t even entirely feel guilty, which makes me feel like I’m just truly evil and want these things. No amount of reassurance feels like enough, it feels like unless God told me directly himself that I’ll never be able to let this go. I’m getting frustrated with religion, and with myself. It feels like no answer is right. You would think the fear would drive me into being a perfect person, but its not, and what OCD deems as “perfect” feels impossible to attain. What am I supposed to do? How can you feel peace with God, while you’re also supposed to fear Him? I feel like I’m not good enough for Him, and never will be.
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