Yes. It’s ROCD. If you wanted to leave, you wouldn’t be tortured with intrusive thoughts about it. The same thing happened to me. Check out concioustransitions.com
Is the same if I want to leave him (I already left him) and I'm happy to not being "hurt" anymore; but at the same time I keep thinking "what if we get back togheter?" He had my same problems, and staying togheter whas really hard and hurtful in the last month... I would love to get back togheter like at first, but I hate the possibility that he keeps changing his mind too! I think I can't stand anymore nothing wrong that he could do! What does this all means?
May I ask how old you both are? And how long you have been together? Remember- OCD feeds on doubt. It’s the disease of uncertainty. It wants what it doesn’t have. That’s why when you’re together you get thoughts of leaving, and when you’re not together, you get thoughts of getting back together! Doing what OCD wants is what feeds it. Trust me, I know how hard it is to ignore it, but the more you do it, the easier it will get. As for the guy you were seeing, has he ever been diagnosed with OCD? I think you both need to have a heart to heart. Really think about how you feel about him - from your heart. Not from the back and forth on your head. Once you make the decision, you will know whether to stay or go. And remember, OCD can seem so real at times. It wants to cause you distress. That’s what it feeds on.