Cheating OCD

I feel guilty every time I'm happy. I have cheating OCD, I read articles about having an emotional affair.. it said when you have an emotional affair you share details of your relationship to your friend. In fact, you love sharing your trouble and you love it when your friend listens to you so well. I have this guy friend who knows about my struggles with OCD and my relationship whenever I felt like it was falling apart. I would rant to him, he said I should prepare for a break up because my boyfriend wasn't making effort and I'm not his fav person if he doesn't text me that much cuz no one is too busy to text back. I was like yeah I agreed because I literally felt it was a one sided relationship and I couldn't open up to my boyfriend about this because of my past relationship it causes me anxiety, like I'm afraid if I complain about something to my boyfriend he'll get upset and tired of me.. so I had no choice but rant to my friend for the sake of advice. I did like few things about my guy friend but i see him as my brother. And idk what to do. Life is getting too tough and overwhelming and now I'm convinced that I cheated. Whenever I panicked because of something I would think of texting my bf but then I remembered he wouldnt text back.. and that frustrated me, and now I'm about to tell my boyfriend about all of this.. I'm guilty and I feel like I don't deserve happiness at all.

l419

Date posted: 3y

Hey idk your age but a decade ago i met a guy who is the cousin of an ex. He was older and wiser and told me “only have girl friends, never be friends with guys” and i have noticed guys i thought were my brothers even knowing them since we were kids, would still take the opportunity to try and become my bf or even just have sex if they thought i was finally single. Guy friends are turtles.. they take their time to find their chance with you. .. you did not cheat because you didn’t know any better. From here on out I want you to consider whether you could see yourself dating this friend. Seriously think about it. And from there make a decision. In regards to your bf, the relationships that work are ones where you can voice your concerns and get the courage to do so despite your fears, and the guy may respond positively or negatively but he stays even through an argument, even through discomfort he stays and you choose to stay. If you really want this guy you have to have courage to tell him what it is you want, and if he doesn’t work on it within the next week or two, if he doesn’t care to give you more effort then you can leave so that you don’t have to suffer through this anymore. You deserve happiness and you deserve better than someone who isn’t there for you.

joy M

Date posted: 3y

I asked my boyfriend why he leaves me on delivered/seen for long hours sometimes and he said " sometimes I'm busy and sometimes I don't feel like replying " I've always known how to deal with that I know he loves me and I love him and I choose to stay with him and I know he would stay through an argument. I did imagine myself being with my friend but i don't think it would work out, he's more like a brother to me, he has a girlfriend and I'm happy for him he would also tell me about his crush and everything was okay maybe I did feel a bit jealous but not in a way that I would be like " oh I wish I was her " I support his relationship and I also gave him advice I told him he's capable of building a good relationship etc. My boyfriend is my last hope, I always choose him no matter what and I've always been scared of losing him because I know if we break up it'll be so hard to move on I can't imagine a future without him. I wouldn't want to be with anyone else. I'm turning 18 soon ♡.

graygoose-2

Date posted: 22w

School anxiety/OCD

So I have cheated on tests and exams before, and I just now have started feeling guilty about it because of my OCD flare ups among everything else in my life. I also have really bad relationship ocd that I may cheat or may have cheated in the past (I didn’t) and so having these thoughts that I cheat in school makes me feel like a really bad person. I didn’t feel bad about it until now, because I know that it’s wrong. I still can’t shake the feeling of guilt and I feel like I should confess to my professors.

JazzyRoses

Date posted: 19w

Being Cheated On OCD

Hi everyone! I have been having a rough time. So my boyfriend talks to his ex still as friends and I’ve been struggling with it lately and I can’t tell if it’s OCD or not but it does feel so distressing. She wasn’t texting him for about 2-3 months as she got into a relationship with this guy and they broke up. She had messaged him saying that she has no one else to talk to and needed to vent to someone. At first I felt okay, but my intrusive thoughts took over and it seemed like she was trying to get with him after the fact. It’s probably just my intrusive thoughts talking but he looks on Discord (the app where the message) constantly now and my intrusive thoughts convince me that he’s still in love with her. Then yesterday I saw one of his BeReals (a little photo app that shows a photo of the day) and I saw that he was watching one of her streams as she is a streamer. I struggled to talk about it because it made my worst thought feel like it came true where he is still in love with her. When we talked he gets a lil mad that I don’t tell him right away like straight up what I’m feeling but it’s hard to process because my thoughts flood in of all the worst things and I don’t want to come off as toxic at all and I know relationships are built on trust and I want to trust because this is literally the only thing that makes me nervous about him. It also doesn’t help that I’ve been cheated on before so I’m trying to protect myself but I’m lost. I get so depressed and so anxious because I feel like I have to grieve the relationship and it’s just so dramatic. I’ve never loved anyone like this before and I don’t wanna lose him by bringing this stuff up constantly when something occurs with his ex. I don’t know why I get triggered so easily and I just wanna heal from it and be the good girlfriend I’m supposed to be 😭

Anonymous

Date posted: 12w

Relationship OCD- fear of cheating

I have this deep fear I’ll accidentally cheat on my long term partner. This fear was initially triggered a couple years ago after being at a bar with my friends where I enjoyed the attention of being flirted with by a stranger. Because of my enjoyment of receiving verbal attention, I began spiraling about what if I accidentally cheat. Since then I have made multiple confessions to my partner to seek reassurance, replayed events over and over in my head, spent hours googling/looking at reddit threads, and now I dread “bar like” situations where I know my partner won’t be around. Today I was triggered and have wasted about 4-5 hours of my day ruminating. Does anyone else with relationship ocd struggle with this fear and have any tips?

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Cheating OCD

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