Ever get a feeling to just to say your right and blame your self for everything? And agreed to everything anyone say cause you feel hopeless? Do you also just say your thoughts out loud sometimes when your angry like the harm thoughts and then overthink it after wards? I feel hopeless at this point
Hi Justaguy23, have i said my intrusive thoughts out loud and ruminated on them afterwards…yup. Have i ever felt like I just wanted to give in and believe what my OCD Bully tells me is wrong with me and everything is my fault because it’s easier than the anxiety of standing up to it…yes. Have i ever agreed to what everyone else says because I either have no confidence thanks to my OCD Bully or because it’s left me numb and apathetic….again yes. You’re definitely not alone in this. Especially if you have OCD plus another illness (or multiple) like I do. OCD wants you to doubt anhything and everything about yourself and your life and your potential so that you spend your time only focusing on it and feeding into it to make it consume you more. Your intrusive thoughts do not define you or your future. You did not ask for them and everyone has them, ocd just gives us much more of them and makes it harder for us to not pay attention to them. There is always hope, even when things seem bleakest, but your OCD wants you to only need it so it won’t let you even consider it. When I feel that way, I try to focus not on my thoughts but at least one thing or memory that always makes me smile or feel happy or good, and think of ways to make that feeling happen again. Don’t blame yourself for your thoughts or your OCD, you did not choose to have it or your intrusive thoughts, but you can choose to not let them consume your life or your future. If you’re not already doing so ERP and therapy can help with your OCD Bully over time, the little steps can have a major impact, but trying not to listen to the doubts the bully tries to convince you of are a good start. Your OCD Bully doesn’t know you, it just wants to confuse you and make you doubt who you are, try not to let it. Best wishes and stay strong.
Thanks glad I'm not alone ♥️
Hi this my first time ever hearing about this app n i downloaded it because lately my ocd been really bad and I feel I can’t have control over it it scares me because I sometimes hurt people around me when I don’t mean to for example my bf everytime something goes well my head just starts spinning in circles with bad thoughts n wanting to ruin stuff with him lowkey I messed up big times bc I let this time my thoughts win me over n took everything off on him without thinking n realizing how bad I had affected him it kills me because everytime I think im jus a weak person bc I always let everything get to me I’m jus so scared because now my head jus tells me your not good enough your gonna lose him this literally jus happens when something positive comes in my head or something good happens always jus wanna ruin it I hate it because I always believe my thoughts instead of him not because I don’t want to but because also of my past n trauma jus fucks it even more from the deep of my heart i believe him but my head reacts differently n lets it out n now am in the situation of knowing I can lose him any minute now even tho am putting my faith in god n trying my hardest to think positive n be better everyday I’m really trying but w ocd it’s so hard n jus get scared n let my thoughts get to me😞 idk what to do anymore
So recently my mind is trying to make me feel like I accept the thoughts, like I'm ok with for example loving X person. After I get a thought like that and I realize it I get anxious and, like right now, I cry for 1 hour+ on the bathroom floor. I feel exhausted and I want to know if I'm the only one having this.
I can be way too hard on myself and beat myself up over the smallest slip up in regards to OCD. Sometimes it can feel like I'm gaslighting myself on what was "so blatantly and obviously a moral atrocity in thought and intent", when 95% of the time I'm not even sure what my own intent with dealing with these thoughts is or why I do what I do. It makes me feel like some shameless beast for "daring to even entertain the thought of something so VILE!!!" When I just get so confused and scared on moral issues, like my mind is pulled down a rabbit hole I can't escape until the tricks are done on me and it's too late, i've accepted such ideas I hate until that hate and trying to not give in convince me "it might not be that bad". It feels like anything, even the most mundane things can trigger this. This cycle happens mainly because I feel like there's "no way to escape committing more 'attrocities' in thought or compulsion anyway"...and these cycles become the basis for more of these incidents. there a way to stop this? There have been multiple times where I called myself the R word, and even knowing it's a slur I still called myself that because "I'm nothing if not deserving of such scorn". Any attempt to stop the madness makes it worse and it's like all this I talked about is so convincing I dare not question it until after the fact. Please help.
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