So I know I have “just right ocd” and the need to even things out and do things “correctly” including body movements and stuff.... does anyone experience it worse at night? Like before they go to bed? This might sound weird but it always comes at me the worst when I’m trying to go to sleep. I’ll lie down and my ocd will tell me that I “didn’t lie down correctly” and I’ll have to sit up and lie down again. Then it’ll tell me I did it too fast and that if I don’t sit up and do it again then I’ll die. Then I do it again but it tells me some other excuse like that I had a pain in my chest or head and it was because I lied down wrong so I have to re do it, and so on. The cycle goes on forever. Sometimes I even feel like I got into bed wrong completely, and I’ll have to get up and walk around my room for a second and re enter my bed until it feels right. But I have a lot of back, chest, head, and neck soreness/pain (I’m only 18 I don’t even know why :( and it happens a lot when I lie down, and for some reason when I feel a pain or sensation, my ocd makes me get up and re lie down or else “whatever sensation I felt will kill me” I literally don’t understand any of this, but it would make me feel so much less overwhelmed if I knew this was normal for ocd. I told my therapist about this stuff and she acted all shocked that this was ocd

Is it possible to have a huge fear of OCD itself? (OCD about OCD) I’m scared that I’m not perfect and that I’ll go crazy or something like that, that i won’t achieve the life that i want, that im weird bcs of ocd, what other people will think bcs of my ocd, that i will feel like this forever... I try to reassure myself that I don’t have it, but I just want to cry. Everything related to OCD triggers me, and I know these things are also signs of OCD. Is this normal for OCD? Maybe I just need to accept it, I don’t know. I think about this 24/7—some days are better, and I kind of feel like I don’t have OCD, but it always comes back when something triggers me. I also keep asking my parents if they’re sure I don’t have OCD. They tell me I don’t, but it doesn’t help because I know they don’t really understand OCD. So, it’s basically just another obsession, but about OCD. Has anyone dealt with this? I’ve never heard anyone talk about this, so I’m not sure if it’s even a thing.

I’m hoping to get some feedback or hear if anyone else experiences similar things. Lately, I’ve been noticing a lot of repetitive behaviors and thoughts that feel hard to control. Some of those things are: - I often get this uneasy feeling, and if I don’t do certain things in a specific way, it just doesn’t feel "just right." - I have to wash my hands until it feels "just right," and if I try not to, I get a thought that something bad will happen if I don’t. - I dislike using public bathrooms and even shared bathrooms at home. - When I shower, I have to wear socks before stepping on the floor. If my feet touch the ground, I feel like I have to shower again. - I get hyper-fixated on cuts, worrying about them getting infected, and I avoid touching water or anything else to prevent bacteria, even if I can’t cover them with a bandaid. - I can’t use dishes that have just been washed because I think they haven’t been cleaned properly. Instead, I use the ones that have already been dried and stored. When I type (like on emails or texts), I’ll fix what I write over and over, trying to make it "just right." - I have a strange dislike for certain numbers (7, 4, and 6) and feel uncomfortable around them. - I also have to follow routines, like making my bed in a certain way, and I can’t stop until everything is in the right order. - I get stuck on intrusive thoughts, like needing to wash my hands repeatedly or constantly checking things (like if I turned off the stove) because I fear something bad will happen if I don’t. - I’ll even repeat things in my head, like words or phrases, to make the "just right" feeling go away. - Sometimes, I treat inanimate objects like they have feelings and worry about hurting them, even though I know it's not real. - I’ve always felt like I’m being watched, which causes a lot of distress. There’s more, but these are some of the main things. I feel like these thoughts and behaviors control a lot of my day, and I just can’t stop them even when I know they’re kind of irrational. Does this sound like it could be signs of OCD, or is it something else? Or just normal behavior?

My mom will sit and listen to me for quite a while, but she interrupts a lot and gets angry/upset. While I appreciate her passion, it's often stressful. Every time I come to her, if I even *mention* OCD, she gets frustrated and says, "Everyone deals with these issues, you know. It doesn't mean it's OCD." And I repeat, "I'm not saying my issues are unique — I'm saying the way I respond to them is a problem." But she just shakes her head and says, "Okay, I need to get back to my day." Full context, I'm an adult, and I live with my boyfriend, but I'm staying at my mom's for the next month. After living away from home for years, I went back to living with her during the pandemic, and I only recently left to live with him. Honestly, I think living with her for so long in my adulthood really messed with me and made me feel like a teenager all over again. I feel like my mental growth is stunted, and that's part of why my OCD is so bad lately. Not blaming, just noticing. She doesn't seem to understand how relieving the OCD diagnosis has been for me, because it explains so so so many things I've struggled with for years, and it's exciting to have more resources that can help me. But I think she sees it as me finding an excuse to *not* work on myself, which is just untrue. I'm not going to let OCD hold me back or use it as an excuse, but I'm also not going to pretend it's not a problem when I know it is — I was even diagnosed through NOCD. The whole point being to fix it, not use it as a crutch. When I have an issue, it's unbearable. Any issue, big or small, feels just the same. I feel a sinking feeling, my mind races, my heart beats out of my chest. I end up running to my support systems, crying, ruminating for days on end. Then, months later, the same exact issue can feel like nothing anymore, because it's no longer an obsession. I'm sure everyone deals with issues in a similar way, but I *know* there is something specific and debilitating going on with me. This is reassurance seeking, but in the face of being told I'm making a big deal out of nothing, can someone diagnosed with OCD tell me if they relate to the specific intensity of these feelings??