kaylee26
- Date posted
- 3y
Adam FAdam F
- Date posted
- 3y
Sorry to hear you’re having a flare up of OCD. So, you looked up psychosis and saw some things that resonated w/ you, eh? Note the pattern: Thought (Am I psychotic?) > Thought causes anxiety > Attempt to reduce anxiety through compulsions (e.g. researching “psychosis”, seeking reassurance that you’re not psychotic, however, still having doubts about having OCD) > More anxiety > More researching, googling, etc. Maybe googling something like “thought of hurting someone” and up comes some result for a serial killer > ANXIETY GOES MAX. > Time to convince myself I’m sane, that I’d never actually do these terrible things in my head… but, would I?., and so on. So, these are the themes: people with OCD think they’re one of the three “mad (as in nuts), bad, or dangerous”. How? The importance OCD sufferers place upon thoughts, i.e. every weird or troubling thought “means” something. Right now, if I were to bet, your google history is filled with “symptoms of psychosis”, “Are these thoughts signs of psychosis?” “Am I a paranoid psychophrenic”. What do these have in common? You’re engaging in a compulsion, viz. seeking reassurance that you’re NOT psychotic. Now, I’d also be quite willing to bet your google search doesn’t contain the following “how to get away with killing everyone”. This will probably give you momentarily relief that I’ve said that, but then you’ll do the same thing as before, viz. but DO I want to learn how to kill everyone? And, so goes the reassurance again. We all have thoughts of harming people. I had thoughts like that today. I forgot about them until now. But they’re not to be feared. You have a value system in your heart, and these ego-dystonic thoughts are perceived as real threat, when they’re simply just thoughts, no different than anyone else. Your problem isn’t that you want to hurt people. Your problem is your desire for “absolute certainty” that you aren’t “nuts” and “wouldn’t hurt someone”.
Adam FAdam F
- Date posted
- 3y
Post 2 of 2. So, my point is simply that OCD-sufferers place an enormous amount of importance & “meaning” on thoughts, when they’re simply the mind “doing its thing” so to speak. The average person doesn’t notice the weird thoughts they have, as they just don’t.. well, “care”. They’ll say, at most, “well that’s weird” and move on. Not so w/ OCD. With OCD, you look at the image in your head of you killing all your loved ones and try to neutralize it w/ reassurance “but I’d never do this, would I?!” “This isn’t what I really want, is it?” “Am I psychotic? Oh no!!!!” “I need to get rid of these thoughts, what kind of person am I?!!” “WHY AREN’T THE THOUGHTS GOING AWAY?!! I MUST BE INSANE!!!!!”, and, so on.
kaylee26kaylee26
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so very much 😭 this helps a lot and makes me a lot less scared. Even though I’m still scared lol but I really appreciate it!
Adam FAdam F
- Date posted
- 3y
Well, it’s a good first step! =) OCD is a weird beast; it turns your fearful thoughts into anxieties about what you potentially “did” or “would” or “want to do”. The complulsion underlying ALL this is the desire for reassurance (“I wouldn’t really do that, would I? I love my family!! How could I ever dare think of such a thing?! I must be monstrous or insane!!!”). The problem: Attaching “meaning” to your random weird thoughts or concepts. Then: compulsively trying to undo them by seeking absolute certainty and reassurance. Again: your problem is NOT that you are a danger to others, or that you’re insane. Your problem is your inability to live without certainty and reassurance.
Adam FAdam F
- Date posted
- 3y
And you’re welcome! ☺️
Related posts
kenzieisfound
- Date posted
- 19w
fear of losing control??
I’ve never been diagnosed with OCD, but I relate so much to what people here are going through. I used to think it was just anxiety, and I felt like I could handle that. But lately I’ve been spiraling—constantly afraid that what I’m feeling is something worse, like psychosis or losing control of my mind. I feel so detached and scared, and I just want peace again. I have anxiety doing the smallest things, like the thought of waking up everyday and even eating give me straight up panic. I am afraid all the time, it’s paralyzing. And a lot of people say someone with psychosis wouldn’t worry that they’re in it, but then I convince myself I’ve been in it this whole time, and haven’t known, and that maybe I’ve been doing weird stuff. Idk. I also get really scared of labels. Even the idea of OCD makes me feel like I’ll never get better or like I’ll be stuck like this forever. I just want to be okay. If anyone has felt this way—confused, overwhelmed, or scared of what’s happening in their mind—I’d really appreciate any support or encouragement.
justsomone1
- Date posted
- 18w
ocd or phycosis?
idk why this is such a recurrent thing for me , I get so scared through the day when I’m not distracted when I think about psychosis. or being put in a mental hospital that it gives me bad anxiety, one time I had a panic attack at the thought of having it 💔 I can’t pin point if it’s intrusive thoughts because it’s a fear of mine .. or not. I think this is the worst thought / fear I have
cait1299
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 16w
Really struggling!
Hi guys! I had really bad harm ocd about 2 years ago and I went through therapy and eventually got really good at handling it when it would pop up. The other day, I was scrolling on TikTok and came across a girl talking about a guy who was presenting a lot of schizophrenic symptoms but no one paid attention and got him help, he was having a lot of delusions, hallucinating, thinking everyone was out to get him, thought he was Jesus and his dad was the president and ended up doing horrific things. The day after that, I was dealing with some work drama and had the thought of “what if all my coworkers are against me and trying to get me fired”. That really stressed me out, cause I don’t normally think about them like that and I went down a rabbit hole of thinking that was the beginning of me developing schizophrenia, ended up googling stuff all night, taking tests, crying and seeking reassurance. I had a thought the other day “your dad is the president”, this one didn’t stress me out as bad as I knew it was just the video I had seen and it was an intrusive thought about it, and I also didn’t believe it. Today I was with some friends and I got a prize at a place we went and it said “lonely” on it. I do have my moments of feeling lonely and this week has been specifically trying so I had a thought like “oh someone’s out to get me cause I got this”. I know this isn’t logical and it wouldn’t make sense to just randomly get it if someone was truly after me and it was just a stupid prize at a random place, anyone could’ve gotten it. Im just struggling a lot with schizophrenic OCD and thinking I’m in the pre stages of it. In my good moments, I don’t think I am at all and it was all just sparked from the video I watched but in my bad moments, these thoughts feel real!! They really stress me out and make me feel like I’m going to lose my mind causing me to lose my job/ end up in a psych hospital/ never live a normal life/ end up alone, never see me my loved ones/ hurt my loved ones. I just want to feel normal and not like I’m about to lose my mind and everything I care about. Please help!!! Anyone else going through something similar and can help me get through this!
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