This all started out when i got a random thought telling me i didnt love my boyfriend anymore. It spiraled and the intrusive thoughts got worse. Im at a point where i almost broke up with my boyfriend because i feel no attraction anymore. Is this normal? Will it ever go away?:(
I don't want to give you reassurance, because they will make you spiralling even worse. BUT let's say that once you learn to recognise and manage your ocd thoughts and compulsion, they will not be a problem anymore! You are already at a good point! You recognise your ocd process! "This al started with thought 1, it spiraled (probably you intended mental compulsion like rumination, checking, rationalisation etc) and intrusive thoughts gets worse. Now I have an urge" Now. You saw how the circle of intrusive thoughts - compulsion - more intrusive toughts - harder compulsion. You need to get out = stop this circle. And because you can't stop thoughts, you need to work on stopping compulsion (especially mental ones!). To get out from this spiralling, you need to stop checking, stop fighting your emotions, stop rationalising, and most important to not follow any urges. It's hard; but the best thing you can do to get out of this, is letting thoughts be there; without fighting nor accepting them. Same with emotions, feel them! It doesn't means that you are accepting them; nor that something is wrong, nor they will stay forever!
Thank you. Hearing this helps me feel better. The only thing im afraid of by doing that is if i accept the thoughts then theyll be true since they feel true already. :(
@iloveanimals You are not accepting anything by doing this! You are simply acknowledging that these are toughts and let them stay in your mind! The more you fight them; the more thoughts will follow. The more you accept them, the more urges follow. Let them sitting in your mind, without giving them attentions. In that way, you are not fighting them, neither accepting them! :)
@Saraa Thank you. Idk if this is a compulsion but is it common for people with rocd/hocd to feel like theyve lost attraction to their s/o?
@iloveanimals Absolutely yes; it happens to me a lot too. Especially when I start to continuously checking my feelings for my bf, when I keep ruminating about thoughts and when I do compulsion! I usually feel a lot of anxiety and guilt too! But thoose are a consequence from the circle, so by feeling anxious or guilty, I know that it's ocd haha Not always the spiralling lead to anxiety tho, sometimes it leads to sadness, apathy etc... it changes from person to person!
@Saraa Thank you thank you. You are so good with your words. I was about to ask if feeling anxious was how youre supposed to feel because i dont anymore, but you answered for me. Youre so kind for this🤍🤍🤍
@iloveanimals I want to precise this: thoughts and feelings aren't compulsion. You can't control them directly. But thoughts and emotions are fueled up by compulsion! Compulsions are actions that can be phisical (like keep repeating words, having to touch things x times) or mental (so ruminating/rationalising = keep trying to answer your doubts, that kost of the times doesn't have an answer! For example: "do I really love him enough? So this time I did this, but I could means x, or maby it means y" and so on. Checking/testing= for example "do I feel like I am attracted to him now? Uh he is Hugging me; do I feel in love? Thinking about this memory, do I feel happy?" Etc! Thoose are the most common one!)
@iloveanimals Hahaha no problem, someone helped me in past too. I know how hard it can be, and how bad it is sometimes! 💖
Hi so I've been having a recent theme of soocd hocd. At the start I was all panicked and couldn't leave my house. Now all my emotions feel like they have turned off. It feels real now like I'm just in denial. It's bringing up memories from the past of shows I've watched or people I was friends with to try and prove the point or people I thought were pretty. It's saying you've only realised now cause you are comfortable as I had a difficult childhood. I feel no attraction towards men and can't remember if I ever have now even though I know I did. It's saying its all fake. I really am. Starting to believe it's real and I just feel depressed now. Am I going to have to leave my boyfriend who I planned my life with. It feels like life is going by and I'm stuck. I have no energy at all.
Good morning everyone, I need some opinions or help on what people might think is wrong. March 2024 is when I started questioning everything about my relationship for no reason he is everything that I wanted, but my mind is trying to tell me that it isn't April 2024 was probably one of the worst times of my life I stayed home from work because I was constantly crying and totally sick because I didn't know what to do. The thoughts slowly started to not bother me as much. I feel like since it ever started I never have gotten that. Love feeling back for my boyfriend, but I want it back so bad because when I did have it, it was absolutely amazing. I have no desire to kiss him or be intimate with him either which also scares me fast-forward to today. I am waking up with so many doubts in questioning myself. Is this ever gonna go away or am I ever gonna feel that love back for my boyfriend ever again? I feel like I'm wasting his time and my time because it feels never ending. I went to a therapist shortly after starting to deal with this and she didn't really seem to help so now on Wednesday I have a new therapist that specializes in OCD I think does anyone have any advice? Thank you so much in advance.
Is this ROCD? My girlfriend spent the night yesterday and we were cuddling when I felt that I may have not felt attraction towards her anymore. I started to freak out, because I felt that I hated her and didn't love her. When we would kiss I would get an uneasy feeling, like that I didn't want this relationship. I know I do, but it's freaking me out, it's like I can't even feel emotions towards her specifically anymore. I've been so distracted by this problem, I feel I'm also lacking attention towards her. I've been on my phone a lot during her stay because I've just been trying to distract myself. It hurts really bad, and I feel like a rude bitch.
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