i finally got a laptop so i can do online sessions and be able to look stuff up better nocd doesnt accept my insurance and im on ssi and get 560 a month and cant afford therapy im hopeing theyll accept my insurnace soon ive been looking for online docotrs that can prescribe me medications and help me find other ocd therapists to help me theres alot of mental health olaces round me but none that realy understand ocd they dont realy have time to tlk to you and i feel like they dont have the ability to prescribe medications properly if there not able to tlk to you and only prescribeing 1 antidepressant isnt gonna help as much as prescribeing a few for all your symptoms i struggle at nite i wake up alot cause i have anixety cause i dont want to get off my phone and stop watching tv i have alot of anxiety i have ocd and depression i was on medications wit no therapy cause i had no idea there was therapy for ocd and i was doing well for awhile then my ocd got triggered and i just was laying in the bed all day i was staying up late and still do i gained alot of weight which wouldnt matter to me if i was better but i wasnt so i was bigger for no reason i tried admitting myself into the mental hospital but they didnt understand ocd i keep my clothes in bags i wash my hands prior ot touching them and getting them out to do my dressing ritual everyday i chnage my cothes i lay my clothes out a certain way put them on a certain way i get out my deodorant and qtip and wash my hands everytime i touch something and i ou tmy hair up in a bun and use face pads on my face its all done a certain way like order and symmetry i wash my hand sget my clothes out i undress a certain then pu tmy clothes on a certain way then deodorant clean my ears then wash my hands then ahir up then face pads then wash hands again when i went to the hsopital they went threw all of my clothes i was crying telling them i cant have ppl touching them they dont allow qtips so my dressing ritual was being messed up i was gonna have a roommate and share a abthroom so id have to do my dressing ritual on the floor of the bathroom and take up the bathroom i cant wash my own hair cause it takes to long the process is just aggravateing its hard for me to shower and shave and pluck my eyebrows ive not worn makeup in along time and not straightned my hair its all hard i went to the hospital to get help but they couldnt accomodate my ocd and me being different and not being able to help wat i do witout getting help for it the doctor there told me they didnt have the resources to help me and refered me to a place in chicago for ocd but when i got home and did the over the phone call appointment they denied me cause my insurance can only be used in my state but there is no inpatient ocd place in my state theres 1 outpatient a few hours away but they dont take my insurance and i dont think i could make the drive im up late im tired i can barely take care of myself and get ready i live in tennessee i was told i could move to the state were theres an inpatient facility but i cant do that rite now i just want to find a doctor thatll listen prescribe me some medications so i can start to feel better anf maybe be able to drive to therapy if i can even find somewere thatll accept my insurance i have tenncare theres also a place in canada that accepts usa insurance as long as your insurnace will cover it they have like a year long program and online stuff the only thing that sucks is im on suboxene i started useing drugs when i got discharged from the hsopital that reffered me to that place in chicago and denied me and was on drugs for a few years on and off doing suboxene and alot of places wont allow you to be on drugs and be on suboxene.

I’ve recently been struggling a lot with OCD. I have had OCD for a long time I just didn’t realize it until more recently. About seven months ago I developed panic attacks one day randomly at work. I thought I was having a heart attack and went to the hospital where they told me it was just a panic attack and I assumed I would snap out and be better within a few days. However it didn’t. Here’s where it gets scary, I was staying at my then boyfriends house while dealing with blurry vision, anxiety attacks everyday, and more (unsure of what was going on). But at some point I saw my bfs (pew pew 🔫) on his table and it sent me into an anxiety attack after sudden thoughts that I was going to hurt myself with it. I begged him to put it away when I’m not looking so I didn’t know where he put it. He did. These thoughts lasted for about four days but began to go away. (I thought that was it and I would be back to normal). Unfortunately though I ended up moving back in with my family when we couldn’t get my panic attacks under control in time for me to get back to work and pay bills. However, coming home brought up a lot of trauma from when I was kid. My anxiety got worse but I didn’t have those thoughts again. About two and half months ago though, I got sick and went to the hospital where they gave me steroid pills and a steroid shot but sent me into some kind of psychiatric event. Ever since then though, I have been suffering from harm OCD, I have had moments of intense anger that I usually have to completely walk away and go on my own because of how intense they are, and it feels like it’s getting worse. Today I felt fine until about and hour and half ago where I started to dwell on the fact that my suicidal thought was influenced by my OCD and at the moment my OCD is at the worst it’s been. This caused me to get suddenly really depressed and I started crying thinking about how I can’t handle this. I then saw a post talking about how suicide rates are high for people with this form of OCD and it made me question if I am mentally strong enough to pull through this. I fear that at times I’m getting worse. I have good days but I have a lot of bad days. Unfortunately this sent me into such a bad panic attack I went over to my nanas crying about how I can’t deal with this. I took a 0.25 mg Xanax which helped calm down the panic attack portion of it but my brain is still uncomfortably active. I guess I just need hope. I’m so saddened by this. It’s like my life took a total 360 in 10 months and got even worse since the steroid shot. Idk what to do about it. I can’t stop the spiral. I talk to two different therapist weekly and start more next week, making it 5 times a week. I feel no improvements…

17f There is a chanse I will get prescribed medication but it's implied that I will go to therapy too. But therapy in my country is very shitty. I'm absolutely not comfortable talking about my POCD there. I have other ocd themes, like checking, symmetry, moral ocd, troubles reading because of ocd and some other themes, but they are not that severe and they don't make me sui🔪idal (please don't flag my post, you will make it worse). Like I can deal with them, but real even ocd and pocd are absolutely insane and I need help, but I know I won't get it there. I'm thinking of moving to another country in the future if I will make it. But to function and stay alive I need meds, cause a lot fo times its extremely bad. So idk is it possible to just be on meds with no therapy

Hi everyone, I'm in a bit of a difficult situation and I wanted to ask for some advice. I recently finished my studies and I am living from my savings while I look for a job. However this process has turned out to be a lot more difficult and tedious than I expected. I suspect I have OCD as I relate to a lot of the experiences described here, in particular those corresponding to pure OCD. I have continuous intrusive thoughts about how what I'm currently doing is not enough, I constantly need to reassured that what I'm doing is right, with some magical thinking and concerns about my relationship sprinkled in. These intrusive thoughts have made it very difficult to make any significant progress in looking for something. Added to this I'm not even sure I have OCD as I don't have the money to afford therapy right now (my mind keeps telling me that it's silly to write this message because there's no way I have OCD). I live in Switzerland so as far as I understand my insurance won't cover sessions with NOCD. In conclusion I'm a bit stuck, therapy would help with finding a job but I need a job to get therapy. If any of you have had any similar experience and have some piece of advice it would be very welcome.