schultzvicki@sbcglobal.net
- Date posted
- 3y
OCD_LemmonaideOCD_Lemmonaide
- Date posted
- 3y
I struggle with this daily so I understand. My obsession is “what if I said something wrong or imperfectly?” I’d say telling your son how you felt is exposure but because you’re reviewing your conversation in your mind, it actually wasn’t truly ERP. For ERP to work there has to be the “response prevention” part. It’s really, really hard I know. I still daily compulse over things I say and do. But essentially ERP would be saying something imperfectly and allowing the uncertainty to remain that you didn’t say it imperfectly while refraining from reviewing. Feeling the anxiety is key. It’s very hard work and one doesn’t just stop compulsing over night. It’s important that ERP is challenging but manageable. If you can’t afford therapy (like I can’t afford it anymore tbh) there are some helpful books out there. I like Jonathan Grayson’s “Freedom from Obsessive-Compulsive Disoder”. There are loads others too. The IOCDF website has a plethora of resources.
Jeffrey Jeffrey
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
First, I applaud you for expressing yourself to your son-in-law. That is a difficult thing to do without OCD - add in OCD and it becomes more difficult. I hear you when you say that you worry you did not express yourself correctly - and that certainly sounds like OCD - you are seeking certainty that you expressed yourself correctly, and perhaps you did, and perhaps you did not - you cannot know for sure, and as much as it is difficult to hear, it is the truth. If I were doing ERP on this particular scenario, I would say that the important thing is that I expressed myself, I made myself heard, and I don't need to know if I did it "right" or "wrong" - and this is subjective to each person anyway - and that I am not going to entertain OCD to try and figure it out. The feelings have been expressed, whatever way is irrelevant and I am going to go on with my day. Having said that, it is not easy to do, but we can choose to compulse or not compulse. What we cannot choose is the intrusive thought - that is beyond our control. I hope this help you - also practice self-compassion and non-judgment toward yourself - you are human and you are the best version of you there is.
schultzvicki@sbcglobal.netschultzvicki...
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank You for your comments—very helpful. So it is okay to feel anxiety ??? I see that compulsion is a choice—it’s such a habit. It is all day with me. I need to deal with reality right?
OCD_LemmonaideOCD_Lemmonaide
- Date posted
- 3y
It’s actually crucial to feel anxiety. If you are doing an exposure and feeling anxious, you can be assured you are doing something right.
Related posts
Anony1314
- Date posted
- 25w
A VERY distressed mom. Someone anyone help!
Please comment. Just say if follows along the OCD pattern or not. I don't need reassurance per se! My daughter was laying across me and every time I breathed a certain way I was getting a groinal sensation. I kept breathing like that anyways (ugh idk why), and then my mind told me I had hurt/a**aulted her that I might as well do something else to hurt because what's more. So idk why or what overcame me other than the thought of doing it because my mind told me I had hurt her already ("my mind literally made me question what to do and I guess the only thing I could come up with was using my elbow) and causing another feeling but it came across my mind to elbow her, and I elbowed her crotch or side/thigh area. Which caused another very unwanted groinal sensation. Then I began FREAKING smooth out. And I've been stressing since. I feel like as a mom I don't deserve to be hers anymore. Idk what overcame me but my therapist says it's all OCD. I was doing SO well! Is this really OCD? This has all caused me a great amount of anxiety. I feel like a terrible person and mom. I just need help knowing if this is OCD. Not wanting reassurance. Just wanting to know if this lines up with the POCD I've been diagnosed with by my current therapist.
Anony1314
- Date posted
- 24w
I'm seriously depressed. Idk what to do or think.
So I dealt with something a couple weeks ago that's caused me DEBILITATING anxiety. I just want to know if this follows the OCD pattern. I talked with my therapist and she confused me. Just say if follows along the OCD pattern or not. I don't need reassurance per se! My daughter was laying across me and every time I breathed a certain way I was getting a groinal sensation. I kept breathing like that anyways (ugh idk why), and then my mind told me I had hurt her that I might as well do something else to hurt because what's more. So idk why or what overcame me other than the thought of doing it because my mind told me I had hurt her already ("my mind literally made me question what to do and I guess the only thing I could come up with was using my elbow) and causing another feeling but it came across my mind to elbow her, and I elbowed her crotch or side/thigh area. Which caused another very unwanted groinal sensation. Then I began FREAKING smooth out. And I've been stressing since. I feel like as a mom I don't deserve to be hers anymore. I was doing SO well! Is this really the POCD I was diagnosed with?
Looping
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 22w
ERP/Therapy
I find while doing exposures, rarely does my anxiety lessen. It usually amps up and stays that way for the remainder of the day. I could be having a fairly decent day, but dutifully do my exposures and then the rest of my day is anxiety filled. I guess that’s just how it is now? Also, I’m wondering if my therapist even believes I have OCD. I totally understand my therapist cannot provide reassurance. But it’s to the point it seems my therapist acts like I actually did the thing I fear. I feel so isolated.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond