Does anyone else struggle with following religious rules? My therapist is trying to get me to be more flexible in terms of rules but I don’t see how they can be flexible.

Somewhat. I also have religious OCD so it is very similar. Mine is mostly to do with doubting my salvation, but it can include rules/laws

I feel the same way about my OCD rules as well. A few days ago I tried breaking free of a contamination rule. I couldn't let my cat children in the room because if they touched the carpet, or rubbed against a wall my OCD deemed dirty, then they got on my bed, my only safe spot in the house would be compromised. It literally felt like the worst thing in the world that could happen to me. We have different compulsions obviously, but you could compare it to the anxiety you feel from one of your hardest compulsions. My therapist recommended that I try to let them back in the room. I did. They rubbed all over things I can't touch and got in the bed and I just tried my best to deal with it on the inside. Then I realized that my outside was fine, I was only freaking out in my brain. Of course this felt terrible, but nothing bad actually happened to me like it felt like it would. The biggest thing that kept me from cleaning and doing my OCD routine was keeping in mind why I was doing this. Because I missed my kitty babies. Because they hated being locked out of the room and would scratch at the door. Seeing them so happy helped me endure the anxiety for them. It wasn't easy and it's a different type of compulsion than what you described, but I think all OCD comes from the same place. Anxiety. I've learned a lot from this exposure experience. While I'm uncomfortable, that's all it is. Discomfort. If you can hold on to a good reason for why you're trying to get over a compulsion, it'll help you work through the anxiety. Also I am emotionally worn out after this experience, but my emotions, feelings, and general physical and mental health were all doing badly from the OCD anyway. So if doing my compulsions barely makes a scratch in fixing my anxiety, why not just not do the compulsions and be anxious towards a healthy path? I may feel like I'm going to explode on the inside, but I can try my best to do the behavior of a non OCD person and fake it til I make it. With ERP the anxiety eventually gets desensitized, so I've just gotta maintain until I'm better. I have had scrupulosity types of OCD come up before and it was a lot of "in my head" gymnastics. So it might be harder to control compulsions that are in your mind rather than with your body like my example. The best thing might be to try your best to separate your OCD from yourself. Because it is separate. It's like a leech on our brains trying to do whatever it can to force us to do compulsions. It'll prey on any little crack it can find. If we love our family, it'll prey on that. If we are scared of a burglar breaking into our homes, it'll prey on that. If we are insecure about our identities, it'll prey on that. If we are devout in religions, you guessed it, it's getting attacked as well. Just think of OCD has the leech I mentioned earlier. If you compulsions, that dumb leech gets a fat meal. It tricks our brains, so it can eat. Starve them out. Sorry for the long rambling message. I've had just enough coffee and just the right lack of sleep to not make a lot of sense. Basically, these mountains seem impossible to climb, but find a reason. What's at the top? Managing my OCD so I can be a functioning part of my family is at the top of my mountain, so what is yours? Find a good reason and things can start feeling a whole lot more flexible that you expected

I have a friend who has religious OCD and it gives him a hard time as well. His dad is also a pastor, so I bet that complicates things. There is a difference between being a really good member of the flock, vs being forced to do things against your will due to an illness. They just tend to look the same sometimes unfortunately. You're on the right track though! You absolutely do deserve a good and happy life! If you mess up, that's okay too. Lots of people do. If they didn't, pastors wouldn't have jobs :) Good luck!