Feel really unintelligent

Thanks so much for your response. I’m glad some other people can relate too! I’m curious, do you ever get the comments like “you never know what’s going on do you”? I’ve gotten those for Ah while, and also yes I relate to that last part, I definitely wasn’t always like this. As a kid I was actually amongst the smartest people around me, I’d say. Lol

@yun444g I don't get those comments often but I often feel like people are judging me because I have problems staying focused and on topic. I would say that I'm actually quite good at multi tasking, just the people around me don't have to watch the game and have a casual talk while managing a partly neurological disorder with sometimes extreme levels of distress and million thoughts. It's really frustrating sometimes but my close friends are used to it. I do sometimes feel really angry about it, it's like someone is judging me for not being smart as them while deep inside me, accompanied by my ego, I think that it may be just the opposite. My OCD actually latched onto these thoughts as in them being amoral towards other people so I often went into a spiral of suppression and senseless self hate.

@ocdalltheway Okay yeah that makes perfect sense. I think in my case, I typically am pretty laidback and kind of just go with the flow despite the storm of thoughts going on in my head. For whatever reason my natural social habit is to just act silly & goofy but that in turn makes people assume there’s nothing going on upstairs, which bothers me if i think about it too much. But yeah I’ve gotten that way too, feeling frustrated with people who don’t really know me and then also feeling super guilty about it. It’s crazy how much your OCD can have an effect on your social tendencies.

Also “feeling unintelligent” is a thought not a “feeling” what are you really feeling?

@Anonymous In this case they’re pretty much synonymous, right? I said I’m feeling unintelligent because I was thinking about the times people have called me out for “not knowing what’s going on” when I really did know what was going on, for instance. I guess my biggest struggle here is that it makes me bitter toward them, it doesn’t seem fair that just because I don’t happen to give off this “super aware” vibe that people just assume I’m oblivious to everything.

@yun444g Yea I totally get what you’re saying, just because you don’t present yourself in a particular way people make certain assumptions about you, I’ve def felt that way esp at work. Buttt what are you really feeling? I see a lot of thinking and intellectualizing going on with all this for you.. what do you *feel*? What are you afraid of? What needs are not being met?