Feel really unintelligent

I have a tendency to live in my head a lot which can make it hard for me to be fully present with big groups of people. As a result I’ve always gotten comments like “he never knows what’s going on does he.” I’m also just easily distracted, forgetful, and can appear airheaded in general. My closest friends know that I’m smart but also I know that most acquaintances have a tendency to think I’m dumb or kinda slow. Sometimes it just gets me down. Anyone else?

Username: ocdallthewayocdalltheway

Date posted: 2y ago

All the time really, even got to a point where I didn't want to take an IQ test from my therapist. I knew I would have a solid score which would only make me feel like an even bigger fool/failure for not being able to manage my problems and achieve my goals. For the close acquaintances of yours, it's more your fear talking as in you are just assuming that they think that. But yeah, it does sometimes really get me down, especially since I know that a few years back I wasn't nearly as distracted or forgetful as I am now.

Username: yun444gyun444g

Date posted: 2y ago

Thanks so much for your response. I’m glad some other people can relate too! I’m curious, do you ever get the comments like “you never know what’s going on do you”? I’ve gotten those for Ah while, and also yes I relate to that last part, I definitely wasn’t always like this. As a kid I was actually amongst the smartest people around me, I’d say. Lol

Username: ocdallthewayocdalltheway

Date posted: 2y ago

@yun444g I don't get those comments often but I often feel like people are judging me because I have problems staying focused and on topic. I would say that I'm actually quite good at multi tasking, just the people around me don't have to watch the game and have a casual talk while managing a partly neurological disorder with sometimes extreme levels of distress and million thoughts. It's really frustrating sometimes but my close friends are used to it. I do sometimes feel really angry about it, it's like someone is judging me for not being smart as them while deep inside me, accompanied by my ego, I think that it may be just the opposite. My OCD actually latched onto these thoughts as in them being amoral towards other people so I often went into a spiral of suppression and senseless self hate.

Username: yun444gyun444g

Date posted: 2y ago

@ocdalltheway Okay yeah that makes perfect sense. I think in my case, I typically am pretty laidback and kind of just go with the flow despite the storm of thoughts going on in my head. For whatever reason my natural social habit is to just act silly & goofy but that in turn makes people assume there’s nothing going on upstairs, which bothers me if i think about it too much. But yeah I’ve gotten that way too, feeling frustrated with people who don’t really know me and then also feeling super guilty about it. It’s crazy how much your OCD can have an effect on your social tendencies.

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 2y ago

Can’t control what other people think, maybe they think you’re dumb, maybe they don’t. If you want to improve your ability to be present try meditation and breathing and grounding exercises when around small then large groups of people. Anxiety will make it hard for you to think clearly so the more you can self soothe around others the better you will be able to connect.

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 2y ago

Also “feeling unintelligent” is a thought not a “feeling” what are you really feeling?

Username: yun444gyun444g

Date posted: 2y ago

@Anonymous In this case they’re pretty much synonymous, right? I said I’m feeling unintelligent because I was thinking about the times people have called me out for “not knowing what’s going on” when I really did know what was going on, for instance. I guess my biggest struggle here is that it makes me bitter toward them, it doesn’t seem fair that just because I don’t happen to give off this “super aware” vibe that people just assume I’m oblivious to everything.

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 2y ago

@yun444g Yea I totally get what you’re saying, just because you don’t present yourself in a particular way people make certain assumptions about you, I’ve def felt that way esp at work. Buttt what are you really feeling? I see a lot of thinking and intellectualizing going on with all this for you.. what do you *feel*? What are you afraid of? What needs are not being met?

Username: yun444gyun444g

Date posted: 2y ago

Hmm that’s a great question. Perhaps a lot of it is purely image-based obsessions—I just hate being seen as inferior so much whether it’s regarding intelligence, looks, work ethic, level of success, you name it. The thing is, I genuinely DO want to keep improving myself and get better in all of these ways (because i know I’m lacking in these departments), but it feels like people always allude to me being inferior in those ways anyway, no matter how much I work on myself. I want to somehow be successful or at least someone that people can take seriously and it feels like that just can’t happen for some reason.

Username: rye00

Date posted: 1y ago

Racing thoughts / fear of insanity

I’m wondering if anybody else deals with an intense inner dialogue. It seems like my thoughts overlap each other and sometimes don’t make sense. Whether it’s a song stuck in my head, a million thoughts at once or both. It seems to never stop, even my dreams are super vivid. More recently I’ve been noticing random words or sentences that somebody has said before that has no meaning to what I’m thinking about, it will just pop in my head for no reason. For example I’ll be in the shower and “hear” a sentence one of my friends said. It sounds like their voice but it’s just in my thoughts if that makes sense. My core fear is losing my mind, so this spirals and my ocd tries to convince me that I’m hearing voices. Can anyone relate? If so what are some things that you have found to be effective when it comes to staying present. I hate not being as involved in conversations or not giving my 100% attention to things happening around me

Username: kthompson

Date posted: 1y ago

being perceived is painful

for me, i ruminate like crazy. all day, every day. 24/7 my mind is reflecting, worrying, criticizing. it’s to the point where when i meet someone new and introduce myself, i am immediately in my head thinking of all the reasons they hate me and why. i’ll literally convince myself i’m a loser or a horrible person and no one likes me. it’ll send myself into anxiety or depression spirals sometimes. but it’s literally. all. in. my. head. im recently diagnosed, and i feel like my lifelong anxiety makes so much sense now. but now i’m sooooo aware of intrusive thoughts or when my ocd is spiking. it’s exhausting.

Username: sisterofthem...

Date posted: 41w ago

brain fog

does anyone feel like ever since they started with intrusive thoughts / compulsions that you feel as if your brain has turned to mush and your intellect has vanished. it’s really hard for me to string sentences together & i feel as if everyone who speaks about ocd has this way of putting it that i never will be able to. i’m still untreated & in the dark to be honest. when it comes about speaking about what ive been through as well i can’t remember everything only the really bad episodes, it’s like my brain is hiding it away from me waiting for a day for me to remember and traumatise me all over again. i’m also petrified of saying the wrong things to people and potentially worsening their ocd or seeming to be uneducated about it and like i have no idea what i’m talking about. i’m still learning but i’m frustrated that i feel as if i still don’t know anything. does that make sense?

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Feel really unintelligent

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