Username: Catlove9

Date posted: 2y ago

I need guidance

The other day I posted something about my harm ocd. I was so thankful that a few people gave me some great advice. A few days after, one of the therapists also replied. It was great advice. But something they said at the end has triggered me so bad that I’m spiraling. They said that if my thoughts change to actually wanting my harm thoughts, to contact my therapist. For some reason, this has sent me reeling because part of my harm ocd is worrying if I want these thoughts! And now I feel like I’m this horrible person and I’m changing. It’s not their fault. They didn’t know they’d trigger me. But idk what to do because now I just feel exhausted.

Harm OCD

Username: AlexisAlexis

Date posted: 2y ago

Ali greymond on YouTube watch pls! I also deal with harm & multiple other themes the content of your thought does not matter and each persons theme is as scary to them as yours is to you. Bad people aren’t scared of their thoughts and don’t see them as bad thoughts ocd is harmless, just anxiety tricking your mind 😊

Username: InkJoy123InkJoy123

Date posted: 2y ago

Hey there ! OCD latched onto your fears. Your fear right now is if your thoughts are true (! OCD) so your mind will make you believe they are to the point that it may seem real ! BUT they aren't. Your OCD has heightened your emotions, your feelings, and is doing everything it can to convince you that you are a bad person in which YOU AREN'T ! Also I don't believe your therapist thinks you will harm others. Its moreso of a warning given to actually anyone attending therapy ! Everyone is going to hear and know that when starting therapy ! I hear it when I started therapy. Its up to you on how you want to perceive that BUT your OCD is making you believe it to be something bad. You are fine and you can 100% tell your therapist that it triggered you and they won't be mad :) It is not their fault too ! Its no ones except one person and their name is OCD. Hope this helps !

Username: BeverlyBeverly

Date posted: 2y ago

I had the exact same thing. I remember when I was having a tough time with my harm ocd one of my family members asked if I actually wanted to do it. It’s not their fault since they didn’t understand what I was going through. It made me so scared and left me thinking if I actually wanted to do that. Clearly I didn’t, but I couldn’t stop thinking about it. No matter how hard I tried, it kept going through my head and I couldn’t get it out. I had to learn to sit with the anxiety and take it. At first I wasn’t sure if I should be doing that, left me so stressed. But I accepted the doubt, and it slowly went away.

Username: Catlove9Catlove9

Date posted: 2y ago

Thank you all for taking the time to respond. Unfortunately this wasn’t my therapist, it was a therapist on here who responded to a post. But I don’t think that matters. What matters is my OCD latched on and now it feels like I don’t care about anything and that I am this horrible person. But you all gave great advice and I’m going to keep working! It’s really difficult. It feels so different than normal.

Username: BeverlyBeverly

Date posted: 2y ago

I’m not sure if this is exactly what you’re having but, when I have ocd really bad I feel numb, when I work on myself I slowly start to feel normal again. You got this. Never give up!

Username: Catlove9Catlove9

Date posted: 2y ago

@Beverly Yes! Numb! That’s exactly how it feels. It’s that and switches with like I’ve resolved tk just be a bad person and then that scares me. It’s hard to explain.

Username: BeverlyBeverly

Date posted: 2y ago

@Anonymous I know exactly what you mean

Username: BeverlyBeverly

Date posted: 2y ago

@Anonymous I felt like there’s nothing I can do about it and I’m just a bad person. On top of that I felt numb, so I couldn’t really do anything about it.

Username: Catlove9Catlove9

Date posted: 2y ago

@Beverly Yes! Omg that’s exactly it. And it was like my reality was different. The anxiety was gone. It’s scary but it just felt blah.

Username: BeverlyBeverly

Date posted: 2y ago

@Anonymous Exactly!

Username: Catlove9Catlove9

Date posted: 2y ago

@Beverly I’m really sorry you know what this is like but it’s nice not being alone.

Username: BeverlyBeverly

Date posted: 2y ago

@Anonymous Don’t be sorry. When we go through these things, look at it as we’re growing and getting stronger. It may not seem like it, but we are!

Username: Catlove9Catlove9

Date posted: 2y ago

@Beverly That’s an awesome way to look at it.

Username: Anonymousalways

Date posted: 1y ago

Exposure or Therapy

I am probably a lot older than most members on here having had ocd for over 40 years and I have had every type of ocd but its always thoughts based and mental rituals around harming people I love. . I have been doing great using self help books, and thought I had everything under control at last. I had quit worrying about it and realised I was never going to do any of the things I feared and would never ever want to. However out of the blue a few weeks ago I had a weird but horrible thought pop up, which I tried to do exposure for, by telling myself we can say anything in our heads even if its not true, as the self help books taught me. . that then started a whole new ball game as I then started bringing the horrible thoughts up on purpose and made them the worst I could for exposure , thinking it was the right thing to do but now i am feeling even worse again as by doing that I actually said the things I feared coming into my head for example:..'I could say I want ******to happen to the people i love ( then I kept repeating in my head that I wouldnt say that) I would never want anything bad to happen to them ever , they are my world and I love them more than Ive ever loved anyone. has this exposure I tried to do become a compulsion? . I seem to be constantly repeating this and then praying to keep everyone safe,,, why am i being tortured like this its as though the ocd bully is now saying ah but what if you hurt people by saying horrible things. please, please someone help me as I am really anxious and upset over this.

Username: Sammy.2024

Date posted: 14w ago

Harm ocd

I was having a really good day at work and then all of a sudden, I realize that my harm OCD wasn’t there and then that reminded my brain to think about all these horrible things. I’ve been having really bad intrusive thoughts about wanting to hurt people or the fear of doing these things and I caught myself ruminating on things like oh well did this movie make me feel uncomfortable so I can reassure myself that I don’t wanna do these things and it’s just that fear like that I’m gonna wanna do it and it’s not even people that I’m close to. It’s literally anyone it could be like a random stranger thing about these things cause I know that’s a compulsion. So I thought I would put a message out to see if anyone could relate or has any advice.

Username: hopefulxmess

Date posted: 7w ago

This really set me back😪

The other day I made a post about being kind and supportive and not being judgmental when commenting on other people’s posts because someone made a comment on my post insinuating that I don’t have ocd and i’m actually just a bad person. At first it didn’t really bother me because I know i’m not a bad person but now my ocd is latching onto their comment and it’s making me feel horrible. My post that they commented on was about how whenever I think things to myself like how my pre teen daughter is blessed to have slim legs and not chubby thighs like mine and she’s growing up into a nice shape or my teen son has a nice shape jawline and neck and it’s good that he’s slim but he’s too slim or how all of my adult kids are so handsome/beautiful my ocd turns my random normal mom thoughts into something inappropriate. I know I don’t think of or look at my kids or any kids or young person in an inappropriate way. My ocd says I do and I was seeking support. That persons comment was so damaging for me. I tried to think maybe they have never had dark disturbing intrusive thoughts with their ocd themes and maybe they just don’t understand or maybe they have never had pocd theme or maybe they are not a parent but even if all of that were true, their comment was still so judgmental and damaging. I am struggling even more now because my ocd is latching onto that persons comment and making me feel like a horrible person. Has anyone else had this happen? How did you get through it?

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