Distrust social media's influence on your relationship perceptions.

Don’t go on tiktok

Recently, I had a really bad bout of ROCD, but when my boyfriend came to visit for the first time in a while it settled down a bit because I was happy to see him, and things have been pretty good since then. But this morning I saw a tiktok about a girl complaining about how her boyfriend doesn’t do that many little things, which is a very minor problem I have in my relationship, and everybody in the comments was telling her to leave him. It was extremely triggering, even thought I’m very happy with my boyfriend and he treats me well. I wish I had never watched that tiktok.

Username: blazedblazed

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

Kinda related to what you said, tiktok triggers me too but with my SO-OCD! Especially when the topic is comphet and women coming out later in life. They talk about minor things that made them realize, and it makes me anxious. I’ve just always imagined having a boyfriend and the thought of me lying to myself about my sexuality my entire life scares me 😭

Username: kmobeskmobes

Date posted: 2y ago

@blazed I’ve dealt with that too!

Username: GvocdgirlGvocdgirl

Date posted: 2y ago

Same thing happens to me! It’s unsettling but I think we think if it didn’t bother us then why let it bother us now? We all have different ideas and have different mind sets but as long as we feel happy and fulfilled we shouldn’t worry about minor stuff, my boyfriend has done so so many things for me and just because he can’t talk to me for 10 minutes I start thinking he doesn’t love me 😭but Ik it’s my anxiety/ocd so I calm down a bit and don’t take things personally

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 2y ago

Thank you for saying this! I’m crying. TikTok has made my OCD so horrible. I started using it at the beginning of the pandemic and it’s convinced me that my children would be caught up in some sort of American version of the Holocaust, that my husband is a narcissistic abuser, that we were going to be broke and penniless because of inflation, that he’s leaving me. I literally couldn’t eat and then I started thinking if I eat I’ll ruin my life so I would go days and days not eating anything and when I finally ate something I would feel so guilty and my anxiety got so bad! I quit it a month ago because I started to suspect i has trained the algorithm to only bring me things that increased my OCD. I’m so sad that I can’t let my relationship evolve naturally cause I’m trying to always hold onto the past version of my relationship, and maybe I have put so much pressure on my husband that he truly wants to not be in this relationship with me. 😭

Username: bun-e bun-e

Date posted: 2y ago

Tiktok is seriously one of my biggest triggers 🥲 I try to remind myself that the majority of the things on there aren’t even how things are in the real world. People, especially strangers, are so quick to make minor problems into something seemingly catastrophic.

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 47w ago

First time sharing my ROCD

I’ve been with my boyfriend for three years. This past year we were at the best place we have ever been which honestly isn’t saying too because we’ve always had a pretty healthy relationship but last year we took a lot of big steps together. Moving in together, spending more time with each other’s family, sharing milestones like graduation with each other and our families. At some point I started getting real nit picky. Analyzing everything that he did. Constantly checking if I found him attractive. Comparing him and our relationship to what people around us looked like. It started to feel like everything he did I found a flaw in and it made me feel horrible. I’m with the best guy ever and he is so dedicated and loving. I would push these thoughts away, try and pray them away and that would work for a while. Eventually it felt like I was going insane. Things that I never( in all my years of dating) cared about now seemed to be all that I could focus on. I started measuring my attraction to everyone ( people who before this I never even gave a second thought to). I just wish I knew why it’s like this now or what triggered the intrusive thoughts. It makes me wonder if I’m settling but then I don’t feel like anything about him could ever be considered settling. I’m constantly praying for a sign or divine intervention. It wasn’t until I stumbled across a TikTok post that described Relationship Anxiety that I finally felt seen, like to a T every detail described what I’ve been feeling and doing. I’m not sure how ROCD differers from Relationship Anxiety but I’m hoping that by finally sharing and not holding this all in I can start to face and conquer this.

Username: Gettingbette...

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 38w ago

Delete TikTok?

I feel like half of my ROCD triggers come from tiktok and the other half come from my bf. I debate if i should just delete the app because i feel like it brings new triggers or makes me think of something my bf did/does in an extreme light (seeing yellow flags as red flags) But i worry if i delete it im running away from my triggers but idk if its good for me :/

Relationship OCD

Username: eb00

Date posted: 38w ago

anyone else feel like tiktok worsens their ROCD

Its good for exposures I guess, but everything on their is so black and white and opinionated. A lot of relationship themed tiktoks and other social media content makes me feel like if we don't do things a certain way we're not good together or we should break up. It can be really triggering at times.

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