Ghost123
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
Close SOCD
I relapsed again and triggered myself. It really tried to convince me despite the evidence.
ada110ada110
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
I had a really bad return to the worst overwhelming thoughts last week after an exposure (which previously hadn't triggered me so much). I felt so down about it but the next couple of days I felt stronger and better able to let thoughts pass, so I tried to remind myself progress isn't linear. It doesn't necessarily mean it's a setback if that feels like a super negative way to describe it. Sometimes it's not such a good day and there's not much you can do but to go to bed and hope tomorrow is a better one. OCD is never logical whatever evidence you give it. Keep going :-)
Ghost123Ghost123
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
@ada110 Yeah I relapsed again, but I’m proud of my journey. I am still making a lot of progress.
ada110ada110
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
@Ghost123 Good for you. I don't feel out of the woods yet myself but it's getting easier.
Ghost123Ghost123
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
@ada110 Good to hear. Do you have a trigger “place”? Like when you’re in the bedroom or when you walk past someone. I’ve noticed that my SOCD spikes when I’m alone in my room for long periods of time (+ social isolation). When I go outside and I see (well I guess) gay or bi couples, I don’t really get triggered as much. It’s only afterwards.
ada110ada110
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
@Ghost123 To be honest triggers can come from anywhere - My OCD finds a way in. But being alone is definitely worse for me too and I'm still on my own a lot while looking for work which can be hard. Just too much time with my own head and no distractions or exposures from the real outside world. Going out it can sometimes be triggered by seeing same sex couples or also just attractive women, or I've noticed sometimes any woman who is friendly or smiles at me, my brain goes "does she fancy me? Do I want her to?". But it's erratic, sometimes these things are triggers sometimes they aren't. Just trying to learn to let these thoughts come and try not to engage in the rumination.
Ghost123Ghost123
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
@ada110 I get these too but not as much. I normally don’t get triggered by same sex couples, it’s only when my OCD is already spiking beforehand that it latches onto anything. Children, teenagers, men and very rarely animals. And not to sound TMI but even like having “alone time” and those thoughts popping up really make it distressful. I’m afraid for my future relationships, in that I fear that I will suffer from sexual dysfunction. Which is not uncommon for people with OCD. I’m also scared because whilst my HOCD goes away, it can come back and seem realer every time. So I have to practice ERP or distract myself which does help. But man, some of the thoughts make me genuinely want to throw up. It’s like OCD is a predator pressuring me or something into doing things I know I hate and will never do. I’m scared:
Related posts
Uhhhh15
- Date posted
- 15w
I feel gross
I shouldn’t have done this (trigger trigger trigger!!) So about a month ago..maybe I watched this video (as a compulsion to prove to myself) The video was called “interview with a p3d0” And basically it was what it says, I watched or more like listened to half of it…after I was disgusted by the person, but now all I can think of is every little thing I do, I feel as if tho I’m monitoring every thought/moment and feeling I have it’s torturous and I hate it..I feel disgusting, the person in the video has empathy and sympathy and had those feelings yk, I can’t explain it you’d have to watch the video yourself but please don’t it will ruin your journey…I feel more hopeless then before, my OCD is telling me so many things trying to convince me things that Ik aren’t true, I’m just really scared I don’t want to be that person I want to be a good cousin and person to my family, I’m sick of my head and myself, I’m so tired that sometimes I can’t even think straight, my head is always in pain and idek how to help myself..compulsions have been becoming more and more exhausting… I need advice or even someone to relate to, I understand I shouldn’t have done what I did but idk how to forget it.. I had made this post already but when someone replied I couldn’t see it for some reason so I’m uploading it again
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Anonymous
- Date posted
- 14w
SOCD false attraction
hey guys, i’m almost fully healed in my socd journey but what’s stopping me is the false atractions. i get them almost 24/7 at this point and to every thing. they feel real and i hate them they make me feel disgusted. they also make me feel like hot and gross but then i see people saying thats what attractions feel like, but i have felt so much attraction to the opposite gender pre all of this and it felt nice and enjoyable not digustinf. i’m also getting false memory trying to show me ‘signal’ from my childhood to prove i’m gay amd i truly don’t know if they’re real. it’s so degrading and at this point i feel like govining up. pelesse if you have any advice or even if your going through the same thing just let me know. ocd is so terrible
bruner12
- Date posted
- 7w
Backsliding
Having a really really bad real event ocd episode that’s so horrible I feel like I can’t move on from it unless I’m 100% it’s just my ocd and I’m not an abuser. This is the worst my OCD/ mental health has been in years and I’m just so disappointed in myself
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