CT Scan Tomorrow

I am terrified. A few weeks ago I was hospitalized for low platelets and it was concluded after what seemed to be hundreds of blood tests, that a viral infection had attacked my platelets. Luckily I have been going to the Hematologist to check on my blood, and my platelets are back to normal. However, I was given a choice of whether I wanted a CT scan for peace of mind or not, and because I of course refused to live with any doubt of what my body was going through at the time or any other time, insisted. So I had an abdominal and pelvic ct scan when they found I had an ovarian cyst. I freaked out and started googling insanely and saw how most ovarian cysts are nothing to worry about but that rarely (less than 1 percent) can be cancerous so now I feel like I am going to die. Tomorrow is my transvaginal ultrasound where they are going to see my ovaries and I am beyond terrified. I keep living with this sense of doom that is just waiting to happen.

Username: AnonymousOCD23

Date posted: 126d ago

oops I meant to title "Ultrasound Tomorrow" since I already had the CT Scan.

Username: missbecki

Date posted: 126d ago

I have health/illness related OCD and anxiety, I totally get it. Last month I had an abdominal and pelvic CT to look at my kidneys, and they found not only a benign tumor on my kidney but also two “masses” on my liver. I had to get an MRI which showed they were a type of rare benign tumor. I had no symptoms or anything, I wouldn’t even know they were there if not for the CT. All that to say, these random findings are quite common, and I’m guessing the cyst you have is totally fine and harmless. Sending calmness to you for your appointment!

Username: AnonymousOCD23

Date posted: 126d ago

Wow! I’m very glad that you and your doctors caught the tumors and that they were benign! I hope you’ve been having a good recovery because you went through so much in so little time. That must have been a terrifying experience - especially with health ocd - but I’m happy you made it out stronger. If I learned one thing from the experience of being hospitalized is how powerful your mind is. I was completely convinced I had something deadly in my body, in fact, my body seemed to be mimicking the symptoms of what I was afraid of having or thought I had at the time. Thankfully I don’t have it but again this darn cyst has caused pain on my pelvis and leg (which they think it’s my nerve that is connected from my ovary to the leg) but they have reassured me that ovarian cancer in its early stages is known to have no symptoms which in of itself is terrifying so no matter how I look at it there’s no room to have a sigh of relief. Then I feel guilty for even being anxious about it because so many women have to actually deal with this…and I feel like I’m being inconsiderate or dramatic or a hypochondriac (which I am). I am feeling a glimpse of hope, although my ocd tells me to feel hopeful is a bad thing because if I’m hopeful then something bad will happen but I guess I have to stay hopeful either way as exposure?? I just want to stay positive. Worst case scenario if it is something, it was caught early…but again I need to invite the uncertainty in.