How have you guys explained ROCD to your partner? I feel like I’m in an urge to break up again. I know it will pass. I love my partner so much - he is honestly so wonderful. I feel like I can’t talk to him about ROCD because I’m afraid he will leave. Me leaving him is the easy way out, and one I know I’ll regret. Has anyone explained this to their partner? How?
Some advice I've heard from an OCD therapist on a podcast (I think it's OCD Stories Episode #317) is when sharing about your ROCD with a partner, it could be helpful to share process over content. Process = Thoughts get stuck in my brain & cause me anxiety. I feel like I have to do certain behaviors to get rid of the anxiety. It's really distressing & hard for me, especially right now OR My OCD is really bothering me today. I just want you to know that if I seem distressed, it's because it's really hard in my mind for me right now. Content = I'm having thoughts that I don't love you and that I want to break up because I'm worried the thoughts are true and the only way out of this anxiety is to end it but I'm not sure because I think I love you but I just feel all this doubt. There's a huge difference. Sharing process opens space for your partner to support you in a non-compulsive way or hurting them by telling them the awful intrusive junk that OCD throws at us.
@you.are.enough This is really helpful, thank you 💚
i was scared too, to tell my boyfriend about my ocd in detail mainly because i didn’t know how to put it into effective wording, til it got to the point where he saw me in the hospital for my ocd, then it was out of my power and control to let it be known to him, but the moral of that is you can’t control what other people will think or feel about you , and that’s what sections off the people who were meant to stay integrated into your life and the ones who need to go. i have so much anxiety about what anyone thinks about me wether it be a partner , family member, or random strangers. But at the end of the day, you can lay your head down knowing you said what you said and/or acted how you acted and they being human beings as well do the same and you then should never feel guilty like you’re the only one who has problems because that’s far from anyone’s reality. Of course everyone’s problems are different and some alike to know you’re never alone with what you think as your own struggle, no matter how lonely and isolating or however so it gets. No one is perfect , flawless , never messes up , and so forth or else the world wouldn’t function or be so unique in a humble , beautifully , creative , diverse way no matter the struggle , and that’s what everyone should understand.
@noriiiii Thanks so much for your help 💚
It will pass. You have to ignore it!!!! I know it’s hard but the more you give into it the more it’ll control you and ruin everything. I have this theme a month ago….I almost broke my marriage. Every relationship has ups and downs. Ocd wants you to be alone and hide so it can eat you up with these thoughts!
@Stardust777 Thank you. I’m thinking of you 💚
I want to be open with my partner about my relationship anxiety in the moment, but hearing about the heaviness of my feelings time and time again has pushed him away. How do I cope with my ROCD without pushing my partner away? He’s open to hearing me talk about it sometimes but not as often as I do.
I'm currently on a break with my new partner of 3 months because I haven't been able to make them understand what my relapse has been like. What has the conversation around OCD been like for you and your partner? Do you give them resources? How much do you tell? Do you tell about triggers as they happen?
Hi I’ve never posted here before. I just learned I have ROCD and it makes a lot of sense. I’m trying to find out what to tell my partner and what not to tell. I told him tonight an intrusive thought and then said “that’s my OCD talking not me!” But he got hurt anyway because it was a jab at him. He said he always feels like he’s under a microscope with me. I feel so bad. I feel like my thought was correct though but also feel like GOSH why did I say that to him? Idk what to do. I feel like there’s so solution to this except to break up.
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