- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 6y
Alissa I deal with those like really strange existential thoughts about existence and like I think they are true and it frightens me I put together all these different ideas and conclude it’s true and they always become more complex and strange and it’s wierd I had a problem with researching endlessly like these thoughts and ideas and they would just in turn put more wierd ideas in my head... I have cut out a lot of mental compulsions and physical I slipped up a couple days ago and it’s created a whole new existential thought torture lol how has therapy helped specifically and what tools do they give you?
It really is worth it, the thoughts still pop up but I haven’t worried too much about them! I kind of laugh at them at times because I know they aren’t true
Right! Mine were always unanswerable questions (like existential and religious) and also suicidal OCD (FEAR of suicide- in which OCD tries to convince u you actually want to do these things). Therapy helps sooo much. Not engaging in compulsions and falling for OCDs tricks is a gamechanger
And also- acceptance. Even accepting that some day I might feel as bad as I once did
My thoughts were more towards hocd (the fear of being homosexual or heterosexual) I was always so scared I was secretly gay. I mean sometimes it’s still bothers me, but I know that it’s ocd now. It stopped me from doing stuff I loved. I actually didn’t go through any therapy I did most of it at home by myself. I just try not to do things that may make me feel better (compulsions) Idk if I’m fully recovered but I can feel myself getting better and that’s all that matters!
I just completed a check in with my therapist today so naturally I reflected on my journey with OCD. Summer/Fall of 2023 feels like a swath of darkness. Bombarded with horrible intrusive thoughts, I thought my life was over. I did not see the light at the end of the tunnel. I hated myself. Life lost meaning for me and it felt as if every hope and dream was shattered. Needless to say my life was lost to me during a time when I should have been enjoying it the most. I was post grad with a good job lined up. But none of it mattered- my mind was as broken. Thank God, I had some small voice in me that urged me forward and to get help. So I did. I felt so scared and unsure. Was I doing the wrong thing going to therapy? I was not. It was the best decision I made for myself. Fast forward to nearly two years later, my life couldn’t be more different. I see and feel the light. I have so much love and gratitude for myself and for everyone who helped me along the journey. My therapist, my family, all the brave content creators who openly speak about their experiences, no matter how taboo. I won’t lie, it was a lot of work. And I had to learn to be uncomfortable and deal with frustrations. I had to learn to trust myself. I still deal with sticky and intrusive thoughts but my response and my daily life despite them can not be more different. So I am here to be proof to you that there is so much hope. If you don’t have the little voice in you urging you forward, than I will be just that. Go to therapy, get help, put in the work. It is so worth it. Every time there is a setback, and there will be many, push through. Feel free to ask questions! But no reassurance will be given.
My struggles with OCD began in childhood, but it wasn’t until after giving birth to my first child at 30 that I finally received a diagnosis. For years, I suffered in silence with intense anxiety, insomnia, and intrusive thoughts, but because my compulsions were mostly mental—constant rumination, reassurance-seeking, and avoidance—I didn’t realize I had OCD. I experienced Pure O, where my mind would latch onto terrifying thoughts, convincing me something was deeply wrong with me. After my son was born, I was consumed by intrusive fears of harming him, even though I loved him more than anything. Seven weeks into postpartum, I hit a breaking point and ended up in the emergency room, where I was finally diagnosed. For the first time, everything made sense. I didn’t discover exposure and response prevention (ERP) until years later when my son developed Germ OCD during COVID. I went through the program myself first, and it completely changed my life. ERP helped me sit with my intrusive thoughts instead of reacting to them, breaking the cycle that had controlled me for so long. Life isn’t perfect, but it’s so much better than before. I can finally be present instead of trapped in my head. Now, I’m working on trusting myself more and handling challenges without fear of “losing control.” As I prepare to help my daughter start therapy, I feel empowered knowing I’m giving my children the support I never had. If you know you have OCD but haven’t started therapy yet, what’s holding you back?
Just wanted to give some hope to those who are having ocd spikes, spirals and worries. This past year I have regained my life back. I went from beginning to isolate myself, being convinced by my ocd that my hobbies are bad and that I should avoid things I enjoyed, and having constant panic attacks. With the work of IOP, psychiatry and nocd, I have made great strives towards my future. I now don’t avoid things and instead embrace my life and ANY possibility that may come. Don’t let the ocd bully you. Yes, I have intrusive thoughts still but I am able to go about my day instead of obsessing over them. You can find this too. I encourage anyone on the fence to please seek help if you are in a tough time, it can literally save your life.
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