I’m 16 and this thing started at 14/ nearly 15. I feel like I’m ‘too young’ to have this. People tell me I’m the age age of questioning and to just accept who I am. I believe I had another theme of ocd at 11-14 (real event ocd) but I feel like it’s impossible for me to have hocd. That scares me because if I don’t have hocd then it means my worst fears are true.
Your not too young to have a mental disorder like this. I’ve seen people that are 13 that have this. You aren’t special when it comes to OCD in terms of you being different. Everyone has it regardless of age and stuff, including you. You have OCD.
@Givenup I wish I knew if this was hocd. It doubt it every. Single. Day.
@Myheadhurts35 I wish I knew if I have ocd or not… if you’ve seen my posts, you would understand why I wish I knew so badly…
@Givenup If I’m honest. You do ask for reassurance a lot (like me) and that’s ocd thinking so…
@Givenup And you clearly obsess about your themes
@Myheadhurts35 I was 13 when the extremely horrible real events I did occurred… I didn’t know how horrible the real events were until I was 20… my mom and a former ocd therapist told me “Thirteen-year-old children do not have an adult's sexual understanding or responsibility. So, you can see why you didn't realise the horribleness of an event until you matured. So now, in the present, you know yourself to be a good moral person. It allows you to let go of the past.” Idk if this is true or not… my mom tells me that “it's not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I'm not a rapist or a P or a chomo... “
@Givenup I’ve been through the exact same thing. An event happened that I obsessed about and I believed that I had r@ped someone and that the police were out to get me. I was 8 at the time the event happens and I obsessed about it for 3 years
@Myheadhurts35 My real events were extremely horrible… I didn’t know how horrible they were when I was 13… I really didn’t…
@Givenup Me too. I’m exactly the same
@Myheadhurts35 Do you think I’m a monster, a P, a child r*pist, and a Chomo? Because I don’t ever want to ever be those things…
@Givenup You just said it yourself. One thing I know is a p word or a child r@pist know that they are one. And most of all… they want to be one. You very clearly don’t. Unfortunately ocd can convince you that you are one. I literally heard of a case of ocd where it made this man believe there was a carrot stuck up his ass… he genuinely believed that. And it troubled him so much. If ocd can do that .. if can do anything
@Myheadhurts35 It says you commented something but I can’t see it
@Givenup Can you see it now ?
@Myheadhurts35 No I can’t 😞
@Givenup You just said it yourself. One thing I know is a p word or a child r@pist know that they are one. And most of all... they want to be one. You very clearly don't. Unfortunately ocd can convince you that you are one. I literally heard of a case of ocd where it made this man believe there was a carrot stuck up his ass... he genuinely believed that. And it troubled him so much. If ocd can do that .. if can do anything
I'm 16 to and have this since I was in 4th grade snide then life been hard but you got it best of luck
*wish you best of luck and everyone else reading this ❤
@Nicholas225 Wow. So what age did it start for you (I’m from the uk and our school years are different aha)
@Myheadhurts35 Basically 9 years old its crazy never knew there school was different than us
@Nicholas225 Yeah there is haha. We start ‘high school’ at 12 here usually. And we call our ‘grades’ years. So for example ’year5’ and we are usually 9/10 in that year and so on. Untill year 11 and then college is after that at 16 years old. I’m sorry you was so young. Can I ask ..? How do you tell if it’s hocd or real?
@Myheadhurts35 Well I didn't know nothing I just wash my hands and touch outlets from urges then later on about 2020 I realized some things didn't know ocd till last year
@Nicholas225 Oh okay. Do you suffer with hocd too?
@Myheadhurts35 Well yes I get some I guess I could say but hard to understand from all the worry I do
I have no idea anymore. I guess this all started with me worrying about whether I was gay, then whether I was a P, then worried about being just attracted to teenagers. After that I started freaking out about not feeling “grown up” enough. Like “I’m an adult wtf is wrong with me for seeing someone who is probably younger and thinking they’re physically attractive. Then I started overthinking not finding older adults (like 30 or 40) very attractive. Like ofc I’m probably not gonna find them attractive, they’re not anywhere close my age. Maybe the desires are half real. Maybe as a 21 yr old young adult I do find older teenagers (16+) somewhat physically attractive. I still think it’d be weird to date one. Maybe that’s the normal reaction I’m supposed to have. If not, please let me know. I just don’t wanna do anything illegal one day and I’m super scared I will. I can’t tell if the fear is my just being afraid of the law though, in which case I might actually just be a bad person. I hate that my brain is just rationalizing thoughts now. I feel like I can’t do the ERP thing of “just accept that the thoughts are there but don’t engage.” Like what? How can I just think a thought that might be so integral to my identity and just ignore it? If it’s all true and I don’t like people my age anymore then I have to know and plan around that, that could change my entire life. I’m rambling, my b.
Im 16 years old and female and up until very late last year and this year I’ve been having thought almost every day that I’m a pedophile or that I’m sexually attracted to or want a romantic relationship with child. I don’t know how to explain it and I don’t want judgment because I’m genuinely so scared and disgusted, but anytime I’m around children I feel my chest tighten, my body feels warm and it feels like I don’t know how to breathe. I sometimes get a groomer response but even then I don’t know if it’s a ground response or not. Also I tend to stare at children when I’m anywhere near them, I feel like if I don’t I’m a weirdo and if I don’t look at them it means I’m attracted to them which I guess could be POCD but I feel like I stare at them inappropriately. Not too long ago maybe three weeks ago I went to the park with my family and there were two girls in their swim suits and I was looking at their backsides and I felt really anxious and scared like I usually do but I felt so upset by looking at them that way and now I’m scared to go to pools or splash pads because every time I do I feel like I stare at them gross and I just feel so disgusted with myself. When I tell myself not to look I end up looking and then I stare. I feel better when I’m not around them but even then, I look back at what I saw earlier that day and I feel anxious again and then I look up what’s been happening and then I feel more worried it’s not OCD. My friends who have OCD say I might have it but I can’t get a therapist, I can’t talk to anyone I’m scared I’ll be put in jail and that I’m not a good person. I’ve never head thoughts like this until this year and near the end of last year and they come now? I don’t know what to do.
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