Does anyone start having intrusive thoughts shortly after, a day, or a few days after sex. About getting an std or giving it to someone else. And then panicking if anything in that area looks “abnormal/different.”
Yep!! From ages 18-28 I was plagued by these types of thoughts. I am 33 now and it is no longer a theme of mine.
@krikri_ Did you get passed it while dating?
@Addie976 So, the shitty thing was I got HPV - which is very common and a nurse basically told me it's not a big deal. But, when I got it I was 18, and I didn't know much about it. I'd spend sooo soooo much time sanitizing the shower after I used it, and the toilet so I wouldn't pass it on. Obviously that's ocd, transferring it that way is not really possible. But yeah it was a HUGE theme for a while for me. I was dating on and off during those years. Eventually I just forced myself to not sanitize, and I got better info from various nurses. I also regularly would get tested, which is responsible to do. I think what helped most was when I was assertive and actually talked to professionals and got tested when needed.
@krikri_ When I actually started taking charge of my health, I was basically telling ocd to f off.
@krikri_ I’m sorry that happened. Thats really good advice. If you don’t mind me asking, did it effect your sex life, or did it not really go there?
@Addie976 Oh no it definitely did... I was terrified of passing anything onto anyone, so I compulsively would tell people I had HPV (often after sleeping with them because I felt embarrassed I was even telling them, because I was told it's super common and I can decide what I want to tell people. Often months later I'd build up the courage and like call people to tell them. I mostly had long term partners during that time, so obviously they were aware of my anxiety and fears about STIs. But it was embarrassing for a few of the shorter term things I had, and it probably affected how I felt about sex in many ways I'm not even aware of. A lot of it had to do with lack of sex posi education growing up, and also just being scared of what hpv meant because I also was a hypochondriac. I also went thru a period where I thot I was pregnant all the time and terrified.
Yes for sure I’ve experienced this even when I know im clean I worry that I’ll give something to my partner
@hiitsemmy How do you handle it?
@Addie976 It was difficult but I kind of just accepted the thought and thought “I’ll handle it when it happens” The theme wasnt that severe for me though. It has definitely been much harder for me to accept uncertainty with some other themes.
@hiitsemmy Okay that’s a good response thought
Correction.. it was embarrassing all around, but obviously more so for short term things. I didn't really do one night stands in my early 20s probably as a result of being so scared of getting someone else sick. Also!! I thot I must have aids for a while. Its weird typing all of this and remembering how bad my anxiety was about this stuff!! I had some similar type fears come up during covid, about spreading illness also. I'm a lot less scared of bodily things now I'd say, I just have different themes now! Lol. But there is hope.. my ocd is WAY less debilitating than it used to be!!! Wayyyy!!
@krikri_ Thank you for your comments they’ve really helped!
@Addie976 I'm glad!! If you wanna chat more I'd be happy to!
I don’t know what to do I’ve been seeing this guy for roughly 4-5 months and I like him so much like he could be the one. He was in town for something for most of the time we’ve been seeing each other but he recently moved back to his state which is pretty far away. I’m absolutely terrified that I’m going to accidentally get an STD from somewhere like a toilet seat or the other day after taking the bus home I forgot to wash or sanitize my hands before wiping plus I’ve had coworkers and even my roommate admit that they’ve had chlamydia and one has HSV. I’m terrified that I’ll get something and he’ll think I cheated and we’ve both been hurt like that before and I wouldn’t want to put him through that or have him think that of me. I’ve been trying to not google anything or go to the doctors bc those are my compulsion and reassurance seeking things but nothing is helping it’s to the point I don’t want to use the bathroom or do anything does anyone have any tips to help it’s starting to effect my life I know this isn’t possible but I keep thinking it would just be my luck that I’d the odd one out it does happen to
I started having intrusive thoughts about my sexuality when I got into a relationship with my ex and I wondered if it would seemingly go away but it hasn’t and I find myself ruminating about it constantly especially before or during my period. Has anyone else felt with this?
So everything has been going well recently. The only thing pressing is for peace of mind I am getting STD tested on Wednesday morning and I am pretty anxious about what the result will say. I go to certain massage parlors that offer extras. And I have made a point to not engage in intercourse but other non-intercourse things I have done. I was afraid that since those women do other things with people that maybe virtual things were left on the beds I would lay down on or something. I told this to a doctor I saw recently and they said it was highly unlikely. But I still have the health worry. But we will see come Wednesday. The only reason I am going is because I went to the urologist and they wanted me to rule things out since I had what seemed like a UTI but it turned out to not be the case. What's a good way to not focus on catastrophizing the situation. I keep worrying that my life is over if I am diagnosed with something and my future relationships will be tainted or I'll put someones health in jeopardy
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