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I have existential OCD as well and have similar intrusive thoughts. Your OCD demands certainty which can never be achieved. The best thing that has worked for me which I learned from EPR is don't engage with those thoughts. Let the anxiety build up. It will eventually come down and your brain will learn that it's not so important. Uncertainty is a part of life. We accept it about every other aspect of life except our obsessive thoughts. And in reality those thoughts are the same as any other thought. They're just... thoughts.

I do not trust my family as well. I’ve been struggling with that a lot recently. I try my best to trust others but I don’t know how. I think lack of trust aids in OCD. OCD is a doubting disease after all. For those of us who have grown up in families we can’t trust, we teach ourselves that nothing can be trusted even ourselves and our thoughts. That’s what makes the OCD so tough.