- Date posted
- 2y
HOCD.
it feels so real guys. Ive always wanted a husband and kids and a family, but now these thoughts are making me believe differently maybe in denial. I hate these thoughts so so much i just want them to go away. any advice?
it feels so real guys. Ive always wanted a husband and kids and a family, but now these thoughts are making me believe differently maybe in denial. I hate these thoughts so so much i just want them to go away. any advice?
I’m feeling this too. I’m feeling like what if I don’t want that anymore, is that really what I wanted?? I cant even tell. I’m just leaving my trust in God as I cannot try and control my mind but God had control over me.
@Yeehaww yes!! keep trust in god and remind yourself that this is ocd trying to trick you. stay strong ♥️
To feel so stressed is not even worth it. I find peace in God and scripture. I’m not compulsions as much which I’m thankful for. Just day by day I know Jesus saved
I feel the same way. It kind of went away for a bit. I mean, the urgency and the thoughts. But after that I started thinking why don't I feel like having sex with him all the time and the only explanation from OCD was that I was a lesbian. I realize it doesn't really make sense and I try to be with the uncertainty but the feeling doesn't seem to leave.
I feel this deeply. Was just listening to a song called Prince of Peace by Hillsong United that I’ve found comfort in when it gets scary. The bridge says: “Your love surrounds me When my thoughts wage war When night screams terror There your voice will roar Come death or shadow God I know your light will meet me there.”
Hey guys so I have been suffering with sexual ocd due to the fact that I don’t feel that romantic spark with him anymore, I love him and I know I do but I get to much in my thoughts thinking about why can’t I feel that anymore what has changed what if I don’t wanna be with anymore I’ve been with him for 4 years and at first I think it was ROCD but now I started thinking what if I’m into girls now I’ve always been the type to say oh a girl is so pretty or I like this about her but now I feel like every time I see a girl I’m like do I see myself in a relationship with her oh she’s pretty oh I like her voice do I find it attractive and sometimes I do !!! Which is killing me I feel disgust thinking about because what if I secretly am no shame to people who are my sister herself is but I just feel wierd because I wanna be with my husband and feel happy there not with a girl and feel like a man because I see myself in the mirrior and I’m like do I myself being a man do I look lesbian? Do I act lesbian or bi? What if secretly I wanna be a man or I imagine myself being a man in a relationship with a pretty girl and idk what to think
I’ve recovered from HOCD before and got my attraction and my usual actual identity back. I was recovered from end 2022- start 2025 until I got triggered UGHHH😭 My HOCD is REALLY trying to convince me and it’s SO annoying cause I genuinely don’t want these thoughts. I know I naturally like men and always have done so. I can’t wait for my first therapy session in two days Omg! I need your advice, not necessarily reassurance, but more advice? My HOCD is throwing random “proof” I did/ saw as a child in my face, which back then had no meaning in my life and I continued to live a perfectly heterosexual life. I’ve educated myself about arousal non concordance / child’s play, but it still doesn’t remove the HOCD. I’ve read therapists great explanations on how it’s not a sexuality issue, BUT ITS AN OCD BRAIN ISSUE. So basically I’ve been straight and i will die as straight. But my ocd is still continuing with the intrusive thoughts/flashbacks. I’ve had some moments where I haven’t done as many compulsions and had less anxiety but still had those damn thoughts and I DO NOT want those damn thoughts. I have so much proof and factual/logical explanations but HOCD is still continuing to thrive. I absolutely hate this and I feel so alone. I wish there was a reset button cause I don’t want these thoughts to happen. I want a man and I stand by that. How do y’all deal with these situations? Cause sitting with the thoughts is clearly not helping.
I feel like I'm lying to myself, like I just don't accept that I'm gay, I don't want to be gay, I don't want to feel any kind of attraction anymore, I want to go to a psychologist to find out if I really have hocd or if it's just an excuse, because it feels like I really am gay, but nothing was authentic, it all started with thoughts that made me panic extremely hard and I felt like crying and I had delusions, I don't understand why this is happening to me, I didn't like any boys before the thoughts appeared, but exactly one day after they appeared, all the boys were attractive, of all ages, I want to recover :( I'm only 17 years old, for about 2 months I've been having thoughts, I don't know what to do, I can't go to a psychologist, I need help :(
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond