The thoughts are here but the anxiety is gone

I’m not sure how to sentence the way I’m feeling, but it’s almost like I kinda just stopped arguing with the ocd thoughts and just let them be there, recently my hocd has turned into a voice saying “you’re gay” and I used to get anxious about it and start doing all this checking to see if I was and it would always end in me starting from stage 1 again However, recently I kinda just stopped caring, and even tho at first it felt like it was acceptance and it made me even more anxious, overall the anxiety came to a major decrease. Idk if you guys experience this but sometimes when I get a very detailed event or image of something sexual, it scares me and grossed me out, but then I really try to put myself in that situation to see if I would like it and my brain always spazzs out and my body tightens all across. That’s one of the ways Ik I wouldn’t enjoy it, but since it scares me so much my brain keeps bringing it back up