I'm grateful...

For having this space to share everything that bothers me. I feel extremely sentimental and emotional about all I've endured and gone through. It's hard for me to grasp everything I've gone through in life, sometimes, even hard to remember. I've been through so much, seen so much, been to so many places, met so many people, cried so many nights, and it makes me feel really emotionally that, truly, no one in this world can say they know me as much as I know me. All I've experienced and felt. My home life is difficult because for all I've seen, change is not one of them. I hate change but I always wish for it in my household. I grow older now, and I get so nervous and sad because not only do I age, but so do those around me. I've developed depression and anxiety and have had them impact my life beyond belief. It's hard to remember how fucked up many days were and still are because I just can't realize it. Now I have this OCD, and it's a reminder that I have yet another thing I can't see impacting my life so much and terribly. It's so hard to believe that depression, anxiety, and OCD mess with our being and psyche so bad because out of all the things we experience, these are the only ones we cannot see. On days where I reflect like this, it lets me have some sympathy for me. And that's all I can ask for.