- Username
- mrein280
- Date posted
- 2y ago
False attraction?
Before hocd I didn't once care for men bodies, but during hocd it felt like I started to enjoy it. I don't like this.
- Username
- Hmac Hmac
- Date posted
- 2y ago
So the very same thing happened to me with POCD. I said the exact same thing “it’s not the thoughts anymore, It’s the feelings”. For OCD specifically, fear can make us feel strange things. Also, some thing I’ve learned over the course of all of this we, OCD people, can often confuse fear with attraction. And my friend, please do yourself a favor, and stop trying to logic your way through it. Your feelings aren’t to be trusted. With that said the only way out is through. You need to find a OCD therapist Who will do ERP with you. ERP is really the only way out. It’s also the only way to feel comfortable again. Your fears and anxiety will probably tell you it will “make me gay.” But that’s crap. Believe me as somebody who was terrified that they were attracted to kids. I know the pain and discomfort quite well. ultimately I had to except that “maybe I am a p*****, ok whatever” and then set with all the anxiety that that brought and not try to push away. And eventually, my brain just realized that this is all bullshit. That’s not to say that I don’t still have it in the back of my mind some days, but it has zero input on my life anymore. You need to think of anxiety, induced by OCD, as going to the gym for your brain. When you go to the gym it hurts but after you’re done, you feel better than you did and you are stronger; Which is where ERP comes in and teaches you how to train to become stronger. Find an OCD therapist, who will do exposure response prevention therapy. You must do this!!! It’s the only way. And if I can do it, I know you can we too!
- Username
- ada110ada110
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y ago
Great advice and so pleased to hear you're doing better.
- Username
- NeverGiveUpNeverGiveUp
- Date posted
- 2y ago
I'm the same I wouldn't say enjoy it but men definitely appear more attractive than women and no offence to anyone gay that's just not my way of swinging. My whole life I had crushes on so many girls in school growing up and even have had multiple girlfriends. Hocd makes me feel as if I'm not the same person anymore. I really do hope after this my attractions come back and I feel like myself again because it's becoming extremely difficult to be happy.
- Username
- Hmac Hmac
- Date posted
- 2y ago
@NeverGiveUp That loss of attraction feeling can be one of the hardest parts. I totally get that. For me it was probably one of the most devastating parts. If I’m gonna be honest, I still to this day I don’t feel like I’ve fully recovered my attraction. However, I think part of that is some thing I need to go to therapy again for and figure out what’s really going on and other variables that might be contributing to it. Doctor Michael Greenberg has a lot of good information on that. Also, one thing I would say to try out is to start heavily limiting your porn intake and see if you notice a difference like give it up for two weeks and see how you feel. May need to give it up longer but regardless, that might be a contributor. Sometimes when I give it up for a long time, I notice a resurgence of my attraction. I definitely think there is something to the idea that we get so desensitized to it that we start to feel “asexual”. To clarify, I am not a psychologist of any kind. This is just my opinion. I hope this helps however, please please please go to therapy. That will be really the only thing that can help you the most. maybe even look into psychedelic therapy. That also could be very helpful for people with OCD as a lot of research is coming out about it. But do not try psychedelics on your own. That is a recipe for disaster.
- Username
- Hmac Hmac
- Date posted
- 2y ago
@NeverGiveUp LMAO, thank you for listening to my Ted talk 🤣
- Username
- mrein280mrein280
- Date posted
- 2y ago
I don't enjoy it but it just feels like I do or want it. I used to really enjoy women's looks and just really wanted to be with one.
- Username
- Hmac Hmac
- Date posted
- 2y ago
@mrein280 I know it’s strange isn’t it?
- Username
- Hmac Hmac
- Date posted
- 2y ago
@mrein280 I think another way of looking at this is to think of this whole experience as a journey instead of something that needs to be fixed overnight. Journeys are often hard, very difficult, and painful. However, once you’re out from the other side of this, whether that’s one year from now or ten years from now, you are going to feel better than you did before you started this journey and will have new perspective. And, I believe acceptance of the thoughts is the key to make this journey a more successful one. Speaking as someone who felt like I need to kill him in order to happy ever again while I was in the thick of it, you will appreciate what you learn from this and the life you live so much more.
- Username
- TnotesTommyTnotesTommy
- Date posted
- 2y ago
it’s ok. start to meditate , pray , think positive in am. every gets thoughts. keep fighting.
- Username
- mrein280mrein280
- Date posted
- 2y ago
It's not thoughts it's more of a feeling
Related posts
- Username
- Tolly537
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Ok I have a question for y’all. After you have a good moment with a guy, like when you think about him and want to be with him and it feels good, does anyone get the intrusive thought “what if I’m romantically attracted to men but sexually attracted to women?” Because that just came up for me and it is not fun and very worrying. Because I have been aroused by lesbian porn (I did this before my HOCD intrusive thoughts started) and now I’m worried because I was aroused by that I can only be sexually attracted to women ?
- Username
- iamokay
- Date posted
- 1y ago
advice on hocd pls
so i’m straight, but one thing that’s always bothered me was i was never the type to look at a guy and automatically think dirty thoughts about them like some girls do i would think they’re good looking and move on. but lately i have been looking at guys and think ways i never have before because i don’t really care for sex but this time i actually think about it when i find someone attractive and it started to worry me because i was like i never thought that much sexually before so why am i now? and then i get thoughts in my head that say why are you worried aren’t you straight why are you worried to think sexual about guys? and it’s the anxiety about the fact that i actually think dirty thoughts when i see a cute guy and before i never would and then hocd coming in to play making me wonder that i shouldn’t be anxious if i was always straight but it’s not that i get anxious because i never thought that sexually before but ocd makes me think i’m worried about liking a guy but that’s not true sorry if it’s a bit confusing
- Username
- Lavander
- Date posted
- 1y ago
so-ocd
New thought just creeped in: as I used to watch same sex porn, am I afraid of what this means (being gay) or am I just denying that I liked it? It seems like it's the same thing, but what if I, deep down, know I like it and am just denying it? Maybe this isnt even OCD. And my so-ocd latches on to this, to sexual attraction so much, bc it's not something we choose. But I want to be attracted to men. I've always liked men. I don't want to be with a woman. I'm so done with this, it brings me so much suffering. Please be mindful if you respond to this. I'm already feeling so bad..
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