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It is not true. It is the OCD. It is very hard to remember in the moment but it will pass like the rest of the other obsessions. You cannot mind read and you have no idea what they are thinking. Here’s a tip: record your thoughts. Listen to it to externalize it and you will recognize that loop throughout your day. And when you hear it just remember it is that externalized voice that is the OCD- and it is looping in your brain. It is not you. (exposure therapy)

Remember, ocd will always latch onto something. So when one obsession quits bothering you, it’ll latch on to something new. I know it’s annoying. It’s like ocd has phases of what it latches too or is triggered by. Don’t let ocd lead you to suicidal thoughts! You are ok. I would recommend therapy if you haven’t tried it. Especially since you are struggling so bad. And rely on God! He is the very best and most important One in our lives. Prayers for you. Don’t give up!

You seem extremely disturbed. You’re letting the OCD win. These new fears should almost comfort you bc it’s a sign that what you’re dealing with is simply OCD — not reality. That’s what OCD does. It goes from one fear/theme to the next. You need to have faith in who you are and who you want to be one day. To me, it seems like you have no faith in yourself whatsoever. Believe in yourself. You got this.

Have you tried ERP therapy? It's helped me with my suicidal OCD obsessions tremendously.