jordanpaulson
- Date posted
- 6y
Help is on the way! ??Help is on t...
- Date posted
- 6y
Gurl it’ll be ok!!! It’s ok to miss someone, but you don’t need him to be in your life because you should get out there and try to find someone new that won’t break your heart! Maybe this is God’s way of saying that there is someone out there who is so much more special and supportive of you and your heart! ❤️ The Lord works in mysterious ways! Wishing you love and happiness! ??
pureolifepureolife
- Date posted
- 6y
When we’re missing someone we tend to idealize them a lot. His faults now seem less important, his strengths more admirable. You’re not really even missing the real him, but the idea of him and all the things he represented. Whenever you miss EVERYTHING about a person, you know you’ve got on rose colored glasses. Something that may help you is writing out a list of his qualities and trying to evaluate them in a more rational way. Double check the good stuff: was it that good? And try to remember what used to bother you. Write out the stuff that used to spark fights and disagreements. And any doubts you had while in the relationship. The point isn’t to take him down or make him seem like a terrible person. It’s just to give you a more accurate view of what you’ve lost so you can grieve rather than ruminate. And so you can let go knowing you’re also letting go of all the things that really didn’t work in that relationship. I’m sorry you’re heart is hurting. Be kind to it! Surround yourself with loved ones.
pureolifepureolife
- Date posted
- 6y
Apologies are one thing. Showing someone that you actually wouldn’t take them for granted again is another. He gave you an apology: that’s great! That doesn’t mean he wouldn’t do it again. In fact, he probably would. Try getting that perspective I talked about. It’s important for you. It will give you clarity and set you up for better relationships in the future, whoever that may be with.
jordanpaulsonjordanpaulson
- Date posted
- 6y
@pureolife thank you so much for saying all that it really means so much to me and I know you’re right, I’m definitely just thinking about the good times. I know it doesn’t change what happened but he’s apologized for all of the things that went wrong and even said he admits he took me for granted and that just makes me really hope that maybe things will workout for us in the future but I really doubt it will. I’m just so confused
jordanpaulsonjordanpaulson
- Date posted
- 6y
@pureolife thank you again so much I really appreciate everything you’ve said thank you❤️ accepting all that just hurts more than anything has ever hurt more. Being taken for granted and losing someone really important to me has really hurt my heart
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Mika05
- Date posted
- 22w
Worried about not being anxious?
These past few days I was fine. Minimal intrusive thoughts ,no anxiety etc(to add I'm on medication so maybe it's starting to work although it barely is 2 weeks) and today I got a sudden wave of anxiety and it started latching on some thoughts like" what if I'm in denial and I wanna break up with my bf? And what if erp doesn't work for me because I actually wanna break up with my bf?" But they didn't really stay long usually those thoughts would make me spiral for days or so, now they lasted for some hours. And now I'm trying to trigger myself into being anxious again because if I don't it means I don't have ocd and if I don't have ocd it means I don't love my bf and if I don't love my bf it means I have to break up. Idk if it makes sense but the lack of anxiety makes me wonder if I actually have ocd or not.
bmaria
- Date posted
- 15w
Rocd?
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shopgirl
- Date posted
- 12w
New relationship and OCD spike
I’ve been really struggling the last week and I need some help. I’ve been seeing a guy for about 2 months who checks a lot of my relationship boxes. He’s so kind and we have a lot of fun together. The first few weeks I was totally smitten but had moments of fear about being committed. We talked about it and decided to take things slowly, and then I would have days of feeling like every thing was perfect with some fearful feelings in between. Two weeks ago now my SO-OCD and ROCD started to come back a little as well as my more anxious-avoidant behaviors. I started to get more scared of the future and it was more intense. At the end of last week, he asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes. He is exactly the type of person I see myself marrying and has great values and is so secure about me. Until last week, he generally made me feel so safe and secure. Ever since saying yes, I feel so scared and anxious and my SO-OCD and ROCD is on max. I also find myself getting more annoyed and irritated about things that were minor annoyances or non-issues before. I’m having intense physical responses to both OCD themes, and the nagging thought and feeling that I need to end things with him because we aren’t right for each other. It makes me feel so sad and guilty. Sex is becoming harder because of the thoughts too, whereas at first it was perfect. I don’t know who I can talk to about this without them telling me to just break up with him. Everything is so new so I think they’d chalk it up to my intuition. But I do want to be in love and have less fear around relationships, so I don’t want to give into the fear. I think it could help me to set boundaries and have space for myself more often. I think I need some advice or insight. I know I shouldn’t ask for reassurance, but having some around how other people have felt at the beginning of a relationship would help. Why is it that the label is freaking me out so much? How do you guys set boundaries to prioritize yourself when you feel this way?
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